How do you get past...

[Jane958]

Your mother telling you that shouldn't have children, because you would get ginger twins with IQs of 50.
She was really cross to be pregnant with you, because she never wanted to be anyone's mother (seemed to be ok with my younger siblings).
Anything she wanted was cased in "your father" which I do not believe ever to be true (now).
Having a completely different upbringing to my siblings as my beloved grandmother came to live with us when I was 2 months old and looked after me until I was 2 and a half. She was born in 1888 and was a "lady" so never worked and had staff.
Mother is dead now, but I organised and gave the eulogy at her funeral, which my sister said was "spot on".

Have you tried counselling?

That sounds really hard, OP. I don't think you can really get past it, but I suppose you just learn to live with it as best you can.

There's a thread called 'But we took you to stately homes' you may find a helpful place to talk to others with difficult parents.

No idea how you get past that. Just be better with your kids than she was. See her for the nasty peice of work she was.

Honestly?

You accept she did her best. As an obviously flawed human being.

While accepting you deserved so, so much better.

Thanks for the replies. I do not have children, but get on very well with any I meet.
She is dead, thank goodness, so no more barbed comments!