Do you tidy up if your child makes a mess when out?

[Moonnstars]

Just that really. At the weekend we were staying at a hotel. Waiting to check in and the family in front of us had a child who picked up one of those little plastic pots of milk and was walking round with it. They then squeezed it and it squirted across the floor. The brother pointed this out to the family and said 'oh look what sister has done' and laughed. Parents told her to come and stand with them (so they were definitely aware of what happened). They were also with another adult checking in (so 3 adults in total).
Am I being unreasonable in thinking one of them should have said something to the receptionist?

To avoid drip feeding, the child was older and clearly had additional needs (hence the pacing round and picking things up. They also went behind the reception desk and were picking papers off the desk). Maybe the parents have enough on their plate without worrying about a bit of spilt milk, or despite this would you still expect them to have mentioned it to the receptionist for them to make sure it was cleaned up?

YABU - children have accidents, receptionist should have been more alert to what was going on (especially as child was pacing round, behind the desk etc)
YANBU - family should have said something

Oh god yes! We always offer as husband is a restaurant manager and it's only fair we clean up our toddlers mess and often ask for the dustpan and broom to do it ourselves..... very rarely have we been taken up on it but it's always nice to offer!!

I always clean up after my child, no matter where we are, but especially in restaurants.

As the mother of a child with additional needs YANBU.

With that many adults one of them could and should have been watching closely enough to stop anything disruptive.

when travelling alone with DS I have often had to take him somewhere he can let off some steam before going to check in to minimise chance of issues.

I was with my daughter at soft play yesterday. A kid had been sick on the floor of the seating area, and the mother sat there watching the staff clean it up. Unbelievable.

Yes, I would ask for a cloth or tissue and wipe it up.

I'm usually the only adult with my kids. I do find that the more adults that could take responsibility, the less likely anyone is to do something.

One parent might be expecting the other parent to clean it up or be quietly seething that they do it all the time and they are putting their foot down that they won't do it so it is the other parent's turn. Or one might think "I'm dealing with the check in - you deal with the kids" but not say anything. They may have thought the kid git milk on herself and hadn't realised it went in the floor.

Especially spillage of liquids, someone could slip over in it. I bet they’d have something to say if there was liquid on the floor and their child slipped in it and injured themselves.

Yes always. I’ll pick up dropped food from the floor, wipe down the high chair and the table. It’s basic manners.

Generally, yes I do.

There have been very occasional instances where DS has been having an epic meltdown and it’s taken all my ability to keep him safe and no other adults to help. But in that case I’ve been very apologetic which is about all you can do in those moments.

I've noticed this in restaurants. Not posh ones, I mean chains like Nandos, Zizzi's etc., where you'd expect to find families with kids. I was in Pizza Express the other day, and there was a large table with 4 adults and 5-6 kids probably aged 3-10. Looked like two families. When they departed, they just left a complete mess of serviettes, crayons & paper (provided by PE to occupy kids) all over the table and floor. There were also spilt drinks and food debris everywhere. Looked like a bomb had hit! You'd think they'd make an attempt to clear the worst up, but no, they just walked away.

Always yes - most of the time I don't do it myself but the 'rule' is before we leave DS will clean up the mess he's made, same as we do at home! I can't stand people who leave the mess everywhere (and get a friendship ick when someone I'm out with will attempt to leave mess everywhere too!)

Are you expecting posters to come on and say they wouldn't bother? 😁

Yes, always. I try and get my boy to help me with any spilled food etc, to try and get him into good habits.

I also judge people who leave restaurants/public areas in a state. Maybe with a couple of rare exceptions like the poster above who said she was very apologetic to the staff about it all.

It’s scumbag behaviour to just expect people to clear up excessive mess that your child left behind under the excuse of “but I paid for the meal/soft play entry/hotel room”.

You paid for your toilet roll too, do you wipe your arse then chuck it on your floor? Probably not.

I had to change the time of my sons swimming lessons. A woman would always come sit next to me on the balcony. Her child made so much mess it was unreal. She didn't remotely attempt to clean it up. And I didn't want people thinking it was my child!

In that case the staff will probably have certain cleaning procedures they have to follow. But I would still offer to help if it was my child.

Mine have ate out regularly since being born and I honestly don't remember any time they've made a significant mess (obviously there's been a spilled drink/dropped food here and there when toddlers). We tidy as we go and would never leave a mess.

Yes, always, although they understood not to make a mess, for making a mess’ sake very quickly. There’s no reason for it beyond the very early weaning stages (unless additional needs). Parents should clean up after their children.

For some reason, people round here seem to think if you go somewhere like Pizza Express, all bets are off as it’s a ‘family’ restaurant, and you can just get up and walk out leaning a mess. It’s disgraceful, IMO.

😂 This sounds like something I’d do.

At a bare minimum, I’d need to loudly declare “Right, that’s us, let’s go home. Have you got all your rubbish? Great, let’s take that with us!” so the other parents knew I wasn’t a scumbag.

That’s a bad example because the staff will have procedures they have to follow and will need to use chemical products covered in their training and they won’t be allowed to lend them out to members of the public for health and safety reasons. So not much the mother could have done.

But yes obviously normal non-biohazard scenarios you wipe up a spilt drink with a napkin, pick up any dropped food from the floor etc. In OP’s example they should have definitely told reception- someone could have slipped and hurt themselves if it was a hard floor, or if it was carpet then cleaning products would be needed to avoid that awful old milk smell.

@Kibble29 me too! I couldn't say anything to her, and I couldn't let anyone think it was my mess. I've grown a bit more of a backbone since. 🫣

always but the Inhave worked in hospitality so know what it’s like to have to clear up after others.

They didn't need to say anything, they needed to pick a tissue and clean it up.