Have £245 until the 27th Feb, does this sound ok?

[Cantwaitforaholiday33]

This is what's left over, all bills etc. Are paid, This is for food, toiletries, transport and anything else, for me and an adult cat, I live alone.
Not intending to buy anything else like clothes, make up etc.
Supposed to be meeting up with a group of friends next week but worried I'll have to cancel. I don't drive and the place they want to meet at will cost me around £25 return on the train, and it's a high end restaurant. Wish we could just have a coffee or something but I know they're all high earners.

I've got the credit card as a last resort but really don't want to use it. I'm sure people would manage on less but grateful for any suggestions.

Hopefully! Just worried that he'll then refuse to pay it or drag his feet..

Well I have two teens and I have £200 until the 21st so on your own that’s plenty.

I could do it with that budget quite easily. Although you mentioned the cat going to the vet - have you already allocated the cost of that?

I think careful planning and going to the restaurant will be cheaper than inviting people to yours. I had 3 people for a few nibbles last month - not even proper food - and it cost me about £50.

If you really want to go to the meet-up, I think it’s doable.You could eat big lentil casseroles, pasta, jacket potatoes, end-of-day reduced price fruit &veg etc. for a couple of weeks. https://realfood.tesco.com/budget-meals.html

Then splurge on a nice meal at the restaurant (you don’t need to have 3 courses or expensive drinks, but make sure you each pay your own bill rather than splitting it all between you). There’s no shame in telling your friends you’re on an economy drive because of the expense of buying your flat.

Keeping in touch with friends is important.

I'm not sure but I'd be surprised if he isn't told by the court when it must be paid back by . If not , your solicitor will be on it !

Yeah, I have a monthly pet plan which luckily covers what she will need.

That's a good point, I suppose it's also saving on time but the principle as well. Of just seeing if they would actually make the effort to come..

There is a lot of info on using Aldi for shopping for meals that cost around £20 a week. Those meals feed 4 so you could put meals in the freezer. Lorna from Feed your family for £20 a week puts up her shopping lists and recipes ,all on the net. I would cancel the expensive meal. You have your travel costs to get there firstly. To me it is not for now. You could spend that money on a lot of groceries. Maybe just meet those friends for coffee another time.

Why are you worried about asking your friends to come for a housewarming? What is making you feel so anxious about asking? I think that’s by far the best move and for the money you would save on rail fare you could probably make a nice simple buffet and just ask people to ‘bring a bottle’. If they say no then you have good reason to skip the dinner as they aren’t being good friends to you. Explain that you’re a bit strapped for cash because of the boiler but that you would really like to see them all.

Thank you ! I think it's because I declined it last time.. I just cant justify spending £50 to meet friends, even if I had more money. It's just the way I am, maybe my expectations are too low?

Shop at Lidl or Aldi if you don’t already. If you are open with your friends about the situation, might they offer to chip in for you? Or could you request that you all meet somewhere more affordable for a catch up?

Many landlords are selling up anyway due to the changes in legislation that are due to come into being shortly, and that it's hard for some landlords to make sufficient profit from their rental property. (with the current higher mortgage rates, many would make the same or more by sticking the equity in a bank, with none of the risks associated with renting.
Many landlords would see being taken to court by their tenant as a breakdown of the tenant/ landlord relationship, and would then issue an eviction notice.
There's really no excuse for landlords not to pay the deposit into one of the deposit schemes within the initial 30 days, it's very basic compliance with the law. but and can be fined up to 3 times the deposit amount.

I am an incredibly cautious person money wise, I’m fine now but remember those times. I value friends more than anything else. So would try to go to the meet up after some fact finding. But if they are proper friends you should be able to be honest. Did you say last time you couldn’t afford to? And they should consider everyone’s purse. I remember going out in London almost 30 years ago and DH wanker banker mate from uni booked a place that was £50 a head, hadn’t considered anyone else budget.

When you say high end, what’s that per head?

We're in a similar position and have put some old & outgrown items to sell on FB market place for collection only. I've also put an old coat (£35) & a bridesmaid's dress (£30) to sell on vinted. Hopefully, selling those will add to our emergency budget if required.

I was leaning towards going until you mentioned the restaurant
Yes you could use you your credit card but you wont fully enjoy yourself
Why wouldn't she enjoy herself?
She missed out last time so it would nice to be with her friends. If you keep cancelling, people will stop asking you out.
If she pays it off before the next due date it should be intest free.

A credit card is just a money management tool,not the work of the devil.
I would economise on everything else. Social contact is important ( to me)

The judge will give them 14-21 days to pay so I'm afraid you'll have to write off that money for this month.

However if you win absolutely know the money is coming within that time frame you may feel happier to use your credit card for an evening out with your friends. For what it's worth though- my friend group has a range of earners. We wouldn't mind in the slightest doing something cheaper so that everyone can come along without being put to financial difficulty

I agree with what people on here are saying about prioritising seeing friends - but by inviting people to a housewarming you are still seeing them. Plus it’s an opportunity for them to show how they appreciate your friendship.

There are lots of good tips on here for economising with meals and maybe it’s a good idea to follow this for a while anyway so that you can put any savings on your food budget in your rainy day fund.

I prioritise going out with friends, because I don't do it that much and with living alone, I know I need to get out more. It sounds like you don't keep a lot of food in stock - it is often cheaper to buy in bulk and keep enough in stock to last a few days if you can, but that's hardly helpful advice now I know

I would do the dinner with friends, but try to contain the cost (don't drink, tell them you're a bit broke this month and order something cheap?). Is it possible to get a bus rather than the train? If you could keep the night out to about £125 max, then keep your groceries as cheap as you can for the rest of the month -plan meals, downgrade the things you normally eat a little. ?

I understand why you feel like that, you were probably brought up to be careful with money, as I was, and can’t afford to splash out often. But saying you wouldn't spend £50 to meet friends even if you had more money makes me feel you need to think carefully about your priorities in life. Do you have other, more local friends? If not, don’t be hasty to drift away from the friends you do have. Friends are important for your mental health.

And do be aware that people with very young children can sometimes find it very hard to make childcare arrangements so they can travel far to socialise without them. If they say they can’t come to your proposed housewarming it doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t like you or wouldn't like to come, just that the logistics might be too difficult.

A couple of things strike me - you have bought your own place, that is fantastic.

The amount of money you have for food and transport is adequate. As someone said use Chat GPT - you could tell it what you have in the fridge/cupboard, the number of days and the budget and ask it to meal plan. Then you can say I don’t like X and ask for new suggestions. Even if you don’t follow it slavishly it will give ideas. Remember basic things like eggs and potatoes etc are filling and cheap.

Start saving regularly into a separate account. preferably one that is a little awkward to access. Even €5 a week, and pay it first before anything else. On more flush months, pay more.

Have a good think about your friendship group. Friends should support each other. If one of the others said to you “things were a bit tight this month, would you mind if we did something more affordable?”, what would you say? I bet you’d say it’s no problem and suggest alternatives. If you try this and they don’t say it’s no problem then they are not true friends and you know where you stand.

I have a group of friends, four of us. Two are very well off, I’m more in the middle. The other lost her job, went back to study and had a very tight budget. For years we met for a shared pizza/ice-cream/cinema which cost us £20 each. We were all well bored of it but we’d still do it as it was a cheap night out and we’d see each other. Now she’s back on her feet, we go out for nicer meals and nights away but still we are just as happy with a walk on the beach and fish and chips or pub grub. You don’t sound sure of your friendship, the way they don’t visit etc. I think you need to give them a chance to show they care enough about you to compromise, and if they are not willing, then let that friendship slide and look for nicer friends. You sound lovely, and maybe if you are honest with them, they’ll step up.

It might be worth signing up to Topcashback (Topcashback ) - it's free to sign up (though make sure you choose that option as there is a paying option too) and then some things you buy online you can get cashback on, but more usefully for your immediate situation you can buy gift cards Topcashback gift cards for major retailers e.g. Tesco, Argos etc and get cashback on the gift card straightaway. The cashback means you effectively get a discount on your shopping. It depends on the retailer but it might be around 3%. If you buy insurance and such like through that website you can get quite substantial cashback but it can takes months to come through.

if your (distant & high spending) friends haven't responded on the housewarming, combined with trying to clear existing credit card debt I'd turn down the invite to the expensive meal - with transport could easily be £100 with travel, & would you enjoy it if you were concerned about the cost.

stay home, enjoy your new home, research community things you can get involved in closer to you.

My Uni student has £50 a week food and transport / entertainment budget.

She manages to eat well, and cooks from scratch: How are your cooking skills?

This is one area you can really improve on, make decent meals, plan ahead and even if you cook 2 portions at a time, it means no cooking the following week. It also means buying cheaper as you can bulk buy.

Your update about not spending money to see friends even if you have it is a really big attitude reveal. It means you either haven’t ever made really good friends or you are incredibly tight. I’m much older than you and after years of friendships with the longest being 50 years as we met on the first day of primary school the difference between us financially is vast. I do not know exact details but you pick up stuff. One of my friends relocated last year and just bought an 800k house outright, her house was still up for sale in the next road to me after she moved, another is worried about putting on the heating.

I am agreeing with what @Felicityjoy has pointed out.

@Cantwaitforaholiday33

Firstly, £245 for just food and toiletries is more than enough for 1 person and a cat! That's over £13 a day!!

Secondly, why on earth are you using a solicitor to get a deposit back?? If the LL didn't protect it, you just send them a letter giving them 14 days to return the deposit in full or you'll sue them for 3X the amount. If they didn't pay then it's a straight forward small claims court procedure done online where you pay a small fee that the LL then pays when you win.

If the LL didn't protect the deposit, then of course you'll win. The court may award up to 3X, but it's usually just the full deposit plus the court cost. A decent solicitor would have told you that you don't need a solicitor to get your deposit back, and depending on how much work they claim to have done, then it will likely eat up the entire amount you get rewarded.

The LL will need to pay within 14 days, but if they can't pay, then they'll end up with a CCJ and you'll have to hope they have some assets.

You really don't need to spend £50+ a time to spend time with friends, it's not a case of being tight, there are just plenty of things to do that don't cost 50..