To think they don't believe DD about sexual abuse.

[awaywiththecats]

New poster need to talk to someone. My DD was sexual abused. Had first camps appt this week. The report has come in the post. I wasn't there when she was talking to them etc. the language in the report suggests they think she's lying, doesn't it? I'm so confused

what was it she found strange about the process?

A professional in a therapeutic role wrote that about a child?! WTAF

It would be worth talking about it at the next CP meeting and getting the views of the other professionals. No one here will know the ins and outs, most of us will find it very uncomfortable that a child is being talked about in a sexualised way. However, it may be that there is a reason for that and professionals may feel it needs to be addressed so she can have healthy relationships. If they feel the same way you do they should support you in getting another practitioner for your DD.

I don't read it in that way. I read it as her inability to distinguish between appropriate and inappropriate relationships makes her vulnerable.

in the transference I was to feel both close up and intimate with her in the relationship, and at other times far away and placed in a voyeuristic observational role
I think it's totally inappropriate to use the term 'voyeuristic' when referring to a child. Her behaviour maybe inappropriate, but the way in it which it's written reeks of her being a 'temptress' and it's deeply misogynistic. For a health professional I don't think the language is acceptable, there are other ways it could have been written. If this was written about my dd, I'd be incredibly upset.
How the hell do you infer 'placed in a voyeuristic observational role' from body language?
I'd be asking him exactly what he means by that.

I don't think it reads as though they think she's lying. It does read as in they think she's exhibiting some sexualised behaviour, and are falling between this being a standard age developmental milestone, and potentially a result of the abuse.

@awaywiththecats maybe its just me but if this is a little girl then I do not think it was appropriate for a man to interrogate her!! I feel that is should have been a female, even though they have the same training!!

I'm sorry to pick on you for this response, but it sounds like you're not educated enough, as with many of the people with very certain 'expert' replies here... all offering quite reactionary and naïve advice.

The language used in that letter is jargon, and probably shouldn't be so unprocessed in a report, but it is perfect reasonable psychoanalytic theory. NICE guidance would be for psychoanalytic psychotherapy in sexually abused girls, so this should absolutely be the right person for her. Yes the phrasing is crude, and I'd guess they're newly qualified (or a final-year trainee who isn't getting their letters checked any more) and a little out of their depth with the administrative side of the work, but it seems to me like they're doing a good assessment and DD engaged really well (considering that this kind of therapy is strange and often very non-verbal/body-language heavy, so the comments that feel uncomfortable to many reading are probably evidence of a good potential for successful therapy, as long as DD and mum can think about it objectively.

The letter explains very clearly why a man would be best for this situation... how do you explore safe relationships and learn to trust men, if you're never allowed to have safe contact with male strangers?

It's very common for abused people of all types to blame themselves, so learning that you're not a temptress in therapy is surely better than self-blame and carrying a misogynistic trope as part of your identity?

The comments about the transference mean that they 100% believe DD was abused.

I hate the word allegations, it does to me sound like you don't believe someone. However in my role we have to write allegation's unless it has been proven in court. Which I HATE. I try and use other ways of saying it without that word because I know as a victim of any sort if I read allegations I would feel that I wasn't being believed

It’s okay, you would only be picking on me if I cared about your opinion.

Considering the child involves feels uncomfortable, alongside the parent, I don’t think your analysis is particularly accurate.

Therapy is supposed to be uncomfortable, you're talking about sexual abuse. It's not a tea party is it