To think this is due to ADHD?

[Bollocksmorelike]

My colleague has ADHD. It can be challenging to work with her as she talks over me, interrupts me and often stops listening as soon as she has finished her sentence, so if I talk she ain’t listening 😆. She struggles with time management and is quite chaotic.
But I like her, we are all fond of her in the office and support her as best we can.
Anyway, my question is, can the following be excused due to ADHD.
She will regularly suggest that I buy her a coffee, or a snack. Absolutely no problem, happy to do that. But then two/three hours later she will say she is popping out for a coffee/snack but won’t offer to get me anything. I have mentioned on her return (as she carries her hot coffee passed me) “oh, did you get me one?” and she looked genuinely shocked and said “oh god, I didn’t even think about you, I will go back and get you something “. Yet the habit doesn’t change.
This is not a financial issue, we have free drinks and snacks, but prefer the take aways from down the street.
It does feel like she is focused on getting her own drink and hasn’t thought about the etiquette involved. But my OH thinks she is just a CF and she knows exactly what she is doing.
So AIBU?
YABU…..she is totally taking the piss, deliberately.
YANBU…Cut her some slack, it’s the ADHD causing this.

But would you be happy/expect to do that while expecting others to meet your needs?

Both things can be true... that it is down to her ADHD, and she is also a CF.

CF, actually telling you to
go to the cafe yet sneaks off to get herself stuff. Start saying no or ask her for £

I have ADHD, sometimes I just don't think about things, but I would really appreciate you saying "when you get your coffee at 11, could you get me one too please", I don't do reading situations very well, but I respond well to directly being asked.

A common trait for us is also having a thought triggered in our brain when someone else is talking and waiting for our turn to talk rather than engaging in conversation. It's not to be rude, but it's just our brains being pretty chaotic and not wanting to lose that train of thought.

If so, she ought to stop asking OP to buy her snacks and drinks then.

ADHD might explain why she forgets (every single time) but it doesn’t excuse the fact she still carries on expecting food and drink from OP and never reciprocates.

She sounds extremely rude, ADHD or not. It’s an explanation, not an excuse. Someone telling you to go the cafe for them and then not offering a drink in return or money is a joke.

I prefer to be left out of group drinks.
It's exhausting.

Thanks so much for this, it makes a lot of sense. “Hyper focused on their own immediate needs and impulses “ is exactly how I would describe her. Less compassionate people would describe her as selfish and thoughtless in lots of ways, as she does lack social skills. (Forgets to say “hello, how are you” in the morning and will just instantly start talking quite aggressively about work. “You need to do the filing and pricing this morning “, which understandably puts people’s backs up)
But it feels like she just doesn’t have room in her head for more stuff. The same in conversation, she is interested in saying her bit but no space to hear others. You can see when she has finished what she wants to say, she looks away and it feels like instantly her brain is on to something else. Whilst the poor person who thought they were in a conversation is still stood there, talking, participating, then realising she isn’t listening at all and has to walk off (looking confused if they don’t know her!).
I think it is important to be understanding though. She suffers from anxiety. I try to lead by example (I am very big on “good morning, how was your weekend” etc before she can get a word in with colleagues.)

I have anxiety and potentially ADHD.
In ADHD the thoughts are not regulated and come at me all day long.
It's exhausting tbh.It is constant chatter.
I agree just tell her what you would like then see if she is trying to get free coffee with nothing in return.