How to keep 3 year old in her room

[farmerinthedell]

Please help before I collapse!

My family is having a really, really difficult time at the moment due to various factors outside of our control. What is compounding it all is that our just turned 3 year old wakes up numerous times in the night and either shouts out for us or opens her door and walks to our room to see if it is the morning.

When we tell her it is not the morning she does go back to her room. She isn't upset.

I am literally at breaking point because I am so tired. Occasionally if I promise her a food based treat in the morning she remembers to stay in her room (bad parent I know). Sticker charts hold no interest for her.

Gro clock just ignored.

She is a bright thing and capable of understanding and a conversation.

She goes to bed happily at 7 but is up for the day at 5 with numerous wake ups.

Please throw any advice or ideas this way!

Take turns to co sleep with her? Or just let her in your bed after first wake up?

Stop telling her it's not morning, ask her what's on the gro clock.

We just let her in bed with us, she comes in every night but I don’t even wake up most of the time so get a better sleep.

Most of the time I just sleep in her bed with her 😴 I don't remember the last time I slept a whole night in my bed without being disturbed

I'm too tired to keep putting her back on her own
And she doesn't sleep in our bed just spins around and ends up kicking us in the face

Does she nap during the day? Some kids naturally need a little less sleep than others, maybe shifting her bedtime to 8pm could help her be more tired and stay in bed at night

Later bed and let her come in to sleep with you when she wakes up. When ds2 went through this phase at 2.5, he learned to just come to our room and climb into the bed. Often didn't even wake us.

Mine are nearly all grown up now and had bed time tokens, they got three tokens they could use through the night, any they had left over were exchanged for different things 1 token = 5 minutes colouring 2 = choice of song in morning and 3 = 5 minutes tv time, always redeemed the following morning, and start again the next day. It's amazing how soon they started staying in their rooms!

Co sleep or a bed next to yours. She can learn to stay in her room then your other stuff is sorted.

Is she being affected by whatever it is that your family is going through? Is it possible that's why she is waking up throughout the night?
If you can understand the why, it's easier to try and solve. She might be sad, scared, feeling unsafe, she might not even realise it or know why, and actually needs reassurance at this time rather than strategies to keep her in her room?

Broken sleep is so so hard, my middle child didn't sleep through the night til aged 4 and it was a nightmare. He ignored the bunny clock too 😫

Put her to bed an hour later.

I co-slept with mine until she was 4 because sleep was premium as a lone working parent.

Does she sleep ok if you do that?

Two of mine used to creep in during the night , it barely woke me up. I agree though that if there is stress in the house it is likely to be rubbing off on her and this might be her wanting more reassurance.I know that when I was under stress I found it a lot harder to summon up energy for consistent parenting so you you might have to go with the easy option for a while until things are better.

With the groclock we had to start by setting it really early, like 5am, praising her for staying in bed til then (!) and being ok with her getting up that early for a while, and gradually move it to a more sensible time by 5 min increments, every few days. Otherwise there wasn't enough "success" for her to get the hang of It. It doesn't sound like it's the right time for you to do that though.

Put a cot mattress on the floor next to your bed. You do what you need to do to get sleep. They all grow out if it eventually. I did this with my 4.
I don't understand why people expect young children to stay in their room all night.

Thanks for the tips so far. I do let her in the bed sometimes but she just chats and chats! When she does go back to her room she at least usually falls back to sleep.

Maybe what I should be asking is for tips on how I can get back to sleep because I just don't!

Sounds like I just need to man up and accept broken sleep for the forseeable.

She doesn't nap and hasn't for a year.

@Maximinus I'll try this - thank you