To have given a present

[TwentySecondsLeft]

Over Xmas, my friend and I agreed to tone down the present buying, and go to a show instead with my children.

Friend wanted to buy the tickets, but I insisted not as she’d already bought for another show plus concert in the future.

I knew she’d probably still get something for my children. She did, so I got her a gift back. Gifts would have been equivalent in price.

She said she was cross with me (nicely) and that she can’t accept the gift.
I’ve not heard from her now for over a month.
Did I do the wrong thing?

I’d hope it’s just unrelated but saying that people can get stressed over reciprocating in terms of presents (but she’s probably just been busy x )

I think you were trying to be thoughtful.

Some people do get offended when you try and pay them back or gift them items when they tell you it’s not needed. She wanted to do something nice for you and pay for the tickets. She didn’t want payment or a gift back.

If she is ignoring you or distancing yourself because you got her a gift I think she’s a bit petty but maybe it’s just life being busy. Have you reached out to her?

Her giving a present to your children is not equivalent to you getting her a present. She will now feel bad that she didn't get you a present. You should have let her just buy for your kids if she said no presents for the adults.

I have no doubt that we’ll be in touch soon, but it feels like a stand off at the moment! We do love each other dearly.

Last year, she paid for a weekend festival plus accommodation for me. She always gets such thoughtful and expensive gifts for my children. I enjoy buying something for her…