BPd or adhd

[Madgirl25]

I got diagnosed last year with adhd ..... but for some reason I don't feel this is right.
there's some things I am good at or can do that don't fit with ADHD.
for example I can remember lots of things fine I just can't always seem to act on them
I am impulsive in eating and with money but I'm also very cautious about somethings
when I was a teen I was fo plenteous reckless with alcohol drugs and sex

to an aquaintence I'm fine and likeable but if you get close to me I get scared of abandonment and scared they will leave. then the next day I won't care and will cut people off.
mom wondering if I have BPD which a lot of my family members have been diagnosed with too (aunts and uncles)
many experiences ?

None of that rules out adhd. The worry about abandonment could be rejection sensitive dysphoria, for example. Lots of people with a combination of adhd and autism get a bpd or cyclothymia diagnosis but the therapies for bpd don't work well for autistic people or people with adhd so it doesn't always help them much.

Have you been around many women with adhd?

Do you mean borderline personality disorder (EUPD)?

I was diagnosed with EUPD years back with all symptoms you've described but in the last few years diagnosed with ADHD and I actually think I was misdiagnosed with EUPD (BPD) and in fact was just dealing with undiagnosed ADHD. They cross over really, I don't feel there's much in it and its subjective to each individual

Yes

I just really need help with emotional side of it all dealing with self doubt and abandonment
I really push people away and avoid people

Having parented a child with eupd or whatever you want to call it. My DC and I are now at nearly 18 years. I'm absolutely broken as a mum. My lovely DC has been given a diagnosis of autism and ADHD aged 6. We are now very many years on from that. Now they are under adult services and I've been told it's eupd. Luckily they are continuing to prescribe the enormous amounts of ADHD and antisyschotic drugs that keep my child vaguely stable. It's so hard. Believe me no one would ever sign up for this. I think possibly the hardest part is watching your kids peer group fly the nest to uni, apprenticeships, fulfilling their potential. I'm hoping to teach my kid how to use a washing machine

I’m in a similar situation, daughter awaiting an assessment for ADHD as per psychiatry diagnosis. Also complex PTSD after the trauma of gynaecological issues, culminating in a hysterectomy at 27 and no children.

We’ve been paying for a psychotherapist for a weekly session and she’s due to see a psychological for EMDR. She also has a colloidal brain cyst (Davina McCall) and FND. It’s just unbelievable and I completely understand how you’re feeling, I’m heartbroken for her and myself, it pains me to see her suffer.

My Godaughter gained two degrees, is now a radiologist, has a lovely home with a second child on the way. Completely healthy with boundless energy, it’s just, so, so, unfair, I feel cheated 😔

I hear you. Believe me I never signed up to 12 and a half years of camhs followed by the new world of adult services where you can't do anything, unless you can. Took a week and a half before adult services agreed my DC did not have the capacity to do their own meds and I had to do it. It's the no end point I find hardest

Was the psychotherapist useful? Something I haven't tried yet, we've done everything else, family therapy etc you name it

My daughter loves her session every week. They have to get on with the therapist, thankfully she’s gelled to this one, we’ve had some horrors in the past, not psychotherapists, other types of therapies.

Whatever you do don’t use Better Help, they made everything so much worse. In fact the she had 4 sessions and asked for a refund, and got it.

I’ve come to the conclusion that she’ll always be reliant on us. She currently can’t work, living with her boyfriend, life can be so cruel 😔

OP, sounds very adhd to me. Perhaps the other people in your family also have adhd.