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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Am I took fussy/is annual leave a deal breaker for you

103 replies

Ladyoftheapple · 04/02/2025 11:19

New to a new role. Smaller team, I work part-time, my husband works full-time. In my old job, I could pretty much pick the weeks I wanted off and they would be approved the majority of the time.
In this new job, one person can be off per week so it's limited. I love having two weeks off over the school summer holidays so that I can have that time with my husband and children but it's looking like I'll be lucky if I get a full week approved!
I'm struggling with this more than I thought and actually I am feeling like the quality time with my small children is more important. However, I have family members telling me that I need to suck it up, "I'm lucky to have a good job and I should want to get somewhere in life" 😳

OP posts:
AirborneElephant · 04/02/2025 11:31

Having restrictions on how many people are off at one time is very, very common. Whether it’s a deal breaker for you is your choice, it would be important to me but probably rank below how interesting the work is, how much autonomy I have and what the team is like. You can play the game to some extent, make sure you get your requests in the moment the system allows, plan ahead ect, but ultimately you also need to compromise with the rest of your team.

So YANBU if it’s too important for you, but if so it’s something you need to really bottom out before accepting another role. Speak to people in the team and your prospective manager as well as to HR to see how reality differs from their policy.

TimeForSpring · 04/02/2025 11:36

Not getting a full week off (in school holidays) would be a deal breaker for me.
Less bothered about 2 weeks - especially if PT meant I could technically get 10 days.

Do you think it will be easier next year when you aren't new, and so get a chance with everyone else? Or is this going to be an ongoing thing every year??

BoldBlueZebra · 04/02/2025 11:38

How many people are in your team? Is there enough weeks for everyone to have one each?

UnbeatenMum · 04/02/2025 11:40

Yeah it probably would be a deal breaker for me, assuming you can get another job with similar hours/pay etc. Is the rule there for a good reason (e.g. safety) or could you ask them to vary it for you?

smallchange · 04/02/2025 11:40

It depends on how much you need this job or whether you can start applying for ones with leave policies that work better for you.

I wouldn't love it so I'd start looking elsewhere, but no way would I leave a job, and certainly not in the current economic climate, without another to go to.

Hercisback1 · 04/02/2025 11:41

Yes it would be

leftorrightnow · 04/02/2025 11:41

I also hate it when my leave options are restricted. It’s a real deal breaker for me.
same situation, Small team and max two can be off at the same time. Recently had a conflict w my manager about it as she just went ahead and booked her leave and left me and the other team member to work it out between us. She doesn’t have kids either and yet goes with her first choices for school holidays etc.

FiveTreeHill · 04/02/2025 11:49

Yes it's a deal breaker for me

I don't live to work. I want to be able to plan holidays and spend time with love ones and when annual leave is restricted like that it becomes harder and you end up with a week by yourself in late january

bigkidatheart · 04/02/2025 11:50

I run a team of 10 and we are not allowed to approve more than 10% holidays.

Original poster
Ladyoftheapple · 04/02/2025 11:52

I haven't been here long but when I discussed this prior to interview etc, and i explained I liked my two full weeks off in the summer, I was told "it should be okay", but it's really not. It's a small team (less than 10) and everyone has children so want the same weeks. I feel like I'm in a pit of doom today 😳 I request half a week off on one of the Easter weeks but that's been declined too

OP posts:
prelovedusername · 04/02/2025 11:58

Check with HR. If you were told you could take two consecutive weeks you should be able to. It would have been a factor in your deciding to take the job.

BoldBlueZebra · 04/02/2025 11:59

The issue is everyone likes two weeks off in the summer holidays. We got around this by agreeing as a collective to take 1 week each and draw straws a for the others with Christmas on a year on year off rota . But this only works is no one in your team is a selfish twat

AyrnotAir · 04/02/2025 12:12

Yeah that wouldn't work for me. I want a week at easter, summer and October when the kids are off and usually go abroad. If I couldn't then I'd be looking for a new job.

Bjorkdidit · 04/02/2025 12:35

prelovedusername · 04/02/2025 11:58

Check with HR. If you were told you could take two consecutive weeks you should be able to. It would have been a factor in your deciding to take the job.

If it wasn't in writing the OP doesn't have much of a leg to stand on.

But it might be better next year if you've just missed the boat this year OP.

However, you don't need a full fortnight off to have 'quality time with DC' so you'll just have to make the most of your time off at other times of year, presumably you still have time to use then that can coincide with other holidays or inset days?

AirborneElephant · 04/02/2025 12:55

bigkidatheart · 04/02/2025 11:50

I run a team of 10 and we are not allowed to approve more than 10% holidays.

That’s just not going to work though? If you get six weeks annual leave that’s 11%?

Amba1998 · 04/02/2025 12:57

prelovedusername · 04/02/2025 11:58

Check with HR. If you were told you could take two consecutive weeks you should be able to. It would have been a factor in your deciding to take the job.

I don’t think the issue is getting 2 weeks together, it’s that everyone else in the team has kids and wants the same weeks

madamweb · 04/02/2025 12:59

This would be a deal breaker for me. I have generally always been able to take leave when I want it.

bigkidatheart · 04/02/2025 13:01

AirborneElephant · 04/02/2025 12:55

That’s just not going to work though? If you get six weeks annual leave that’s 11%?

Show quote history

That'sm 10% of staff off at one time, sorry think i worded that wrong? We can all put holidays in for the 8 bank holidays and Manager doesn't count towards productive staff

HorrorFan81 · 04/02/2025 13:06

Yeah this would be a deal breaker for me and I'd immediately be looking for something new. I take a week each in Easter, May and October. 2 weeks at Christmas and at least 2 weeks in summer (this year it's closer to 3). I couldn't work somewhere that restricted my ability to have good holidays with the kids

Then again, that's not the kind of industry I work in. Is this common in your industry, will you struggle to find an alternative with better leave arrangements?

jolota · 04/02/2025 13:42

I probably wouldn't like this either but I also work in a small company & the alternative is tough too.
All the work just gets backlogged if several people are off at the same time and it makes coming back to work really stressful playing catch up and its also stressful for the people working as they can't cover everyone who is on holidays workload so customers get frustrated etc.
I suppose whether or not your situation is a deal breaker depends on you.
I thought that most jobs honoured your holiday if it was booked prior to taking the job if you give them the dates in advance so that is particularly annoying I imagine.
Is this common in your industry? Are there other jobs with more flexibility? Can you ask for confirmation in the interview?
Though I imagine most companies have a policy that leave has to be approved just to cover themselves even if they don't generally bother.

Ferrazzuoli · 04/02/2025 13:45

This wouldn't necessarily be a deal breaker for me but it would be a significant negative. I wouldn't resign with nowhere to go but I might start looking around for other jobs.

Catza · 04/02/2025 16:20

AirborneElephant · 04/02/2025 12:55

That’s just not going to work though? If you get six weeks annual leave that’s 11%?

Show quote history

Six weeks is pretty unusual for most workplaces. It's more typical to get a bare minimum of 20 days plus BH.

Crushgrape · 04/02/2025 16:26

deal breaker for me I’d have to look for an new job.

stichguru · 04/02/2025 16:38

You ARE "lucky to have a job". However that does not mean you can't be struggling with aspects of your job or want to find a different one. Leave being a pain could well be a deal breaker, good luck.

SleepToad · 04/02/2025 16:42

As someone who managed a large team with only a few parents in it I always prioritised them often having to point out to the younger staff they would be better off going on holiday during term time.

To not get much chance of 2 consecutive weeks in the school holidays is pretty poor and I would be looking to leave and telling them why.

I would also be having a chat with hr given you were told it would be a huge problem