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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Weird Facebook Issue - is he being deceptive?

6 replies

Alwayskeepbelieving · 03/02/2025 22:17

Hi, I am hoping someone might understand Facebook a little more than me…
So, my partner has been acting a little strange lately. Then I noticed he was no longer on Facebook… or so it seemed. He was no longer my “friend”, nor did he show up in the friends lists of our mutual friends (his mum, his brother etc) or anyone for that matter (his friends). I can’t see him at all. So one might assume he had just deactivated his account. Right? All good so far…
However, using a friend’s account, I have found that he is still showing in his mum and brother’s friends lists, and that of various other friends of his (and his ex!), it’s just that I can’t see him at all on my account. Immediately, I assumed that I had been blocked…. but bizarrely he’s still showing up on messenger, and at the top states “you’re friends on facebook”. I therefore don’t think I’ve been blocked.
I would also add that neither of us particularly use Facebook save for groups etc, it’s just all very odd and added to the strange things that have happened lately has made me feel very anxious and unsettled.
I am very confused and I don’t really understand what’s happened. I want to call him out on the Facebook issue, and find out what’s happening, but I want to be sure of the situation before I do. I don’t want to make any wild accusations if it transpired that there could be a perfectly reasonable explanation.
Does anyone have any idea ideas as to what may have happened to cause this situation? Can you manage to block somebody just on Facebook but not on messenger? Any ideas? Thank you 🙏

OP posts:
onwardsup4 · 03/02/2025 22:51

I no longer have Facebook but pretty sure you can choose who can or can't see certain things , have a look on your own privacy settings and you'll see it

POTC · 03/02/2025 22:52

Yes, when you block someone it asks if you want to block on fb as well as messenger. Not sure about the other way around though

Ablondiebutagoody · 03/02/2025 23:44

Call him out? I think that you are the one acting strangely here. Why do you care about his Facebook settings?

Catza · 04/02/2025 09:02

The only idea I have is to actually not befriend your own husband on Facebook. You seem to be going through quite a bit of angst over something which, on the surface, appears inconsequential. Using friend's account is a full on "secret squirrel" mode and is a slippery slope, in my view.

Yawningisinfectious · 04/02/2025 09:30

When you say your partner had been "acting strange" lately OP what exactly has been worrying you about his behaviour?

NewYearNewDietAgain · 04/02/2025 13:28

It looks like he's blocked you on Facebook but not on messenger. I'd say he's hiding you from someone or hiding something (someone) from you.

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