You can’t buy time but you can always earn more money?

[Uion]

Obviously shouldn’t be applied to every area of your life as you’d wind up in a lot of debt… but booking a holiday while you don’t have to consider school holidays even if it means paying it off monthly with no interest, dropping your hours at work to spend more time with your children, working less generally as you’re approaching retirement so you can enjoy having energy to do things and just taking it easier… would you do this providing you could still meet all the essential bills and outgoings?

It's always women who this is said to though isn't it? It's always women who are expected to cut their working hours / pension / career goals under the guise of "why have children so someone else can raise them" type shit.

When men start getting asked the above, then I'll get less cross about this.

I did. I always say that I would rather have time than money so have taken jobs with limited hours. I earn 'enough' money, I could earn a lot more but that would mean a long commute, more hours spent working or thinking about work. I value my free time and can cut my spending much more easily than I can cut the things I want to do. But I am single and my kids are adults and I'm winding down to retirement, all things which fed into my decision. It can be harder if you have dependents and a lot more working time left to you.

I understand your point.

it's true though isn't it.

We outsource loads of things to give us extra time.

I am self-employed and I often check whether something is worth the cost by asking myself: is this worth an hour (or 10 or 40) of my time? If it is, I am happy to pay it. I won't slave away, doing something I'm not good at when I could pay someone else to do it better or faster and earn the money to pay them by taking on more work that I enjoy and find relatively easy.

Absolutely.
My late partner died at 49. Life is too short to spend saving for a tomorrow that may never come.
I am sensible and have a basic plan for retirement, but I refuse to deny myself or my kids things or experiences in the here and now based on unknowns of tomorrow.

I'm not sure that men don't get this advice ever.

My dh worked abroad a lot when the kids were young and an nearly every older man he spoke to said you will regret it, you are just a number to the employer, your family are only young once.

You're not wrong.
I could earn more, but being able to drop off /pick up my daughter etc is a privilege for which I'm grateful.

The time has flown by and I'll have 45 to (currently) 68 left to earn once she's 18.
Hopefully I can build a career afterwards that allows me to increase my retirement fund and stop working long before 68.

To a degree, yes, but I do want a certain standard of living for me and my family - one which seems harder to get these days despite both of us working full time.

I grew up poor, never getting to do anything until I was 16 and we had our first family holiday (Italy!), I don't want to just be getting by. There's a balance and I won't work the crazy hours I used to in my 20s.

Totally get this

I wouldn't book a holiday if I didn't have the money to pay for it, but I would absolutely work less hours if I could. We are fortunate to both be good earners. I started a new job late last year, 3 full days, 2 * 1/2 days, I think it's hard to find anything with less than 30 hours/week. I was working before this, but could take all the school holidays off. This is the first school year where the kids have had to manage with both of us working in the school holidays, I have my 2 afternoons off and my husband is going to do some half-days, but I'd still rather one of us be off the whole week with them, even though they are no longer tiny (youngest is 10). Annual leave just doesn't stretch to that though. Work is really quiet at the moment and I was asking my husband whether I should raise the option of taking unpaid parental leave to be off over the Feb half-term, but he thinks it will look like I don't want to work. He's probably right, I am very new. I'd happily max out the unpaid parental leave though, time with them is precious.

On your retirement example I would like to retire before state pension age, so would rather earn more sooner to make that happen. I would also rather not have to struggle financially when I can no longer earn money in old age.

I get what you are saying but it is a balance. You have to earn it at some point.

@Uion not sure what you're asking

It's not always automatic that you can earn more money. You might get ill etc

Whoever says this must be wildly optimistic

I had the opposite. Took two short breaks between contracts in my 30s and had horrified people asking questions about it. Only three months off!

seems a lot different now I'm older.

often depends on the people in terms of comments. I also get people thinking my life must he more expensive due to being single but it was more expensive when I had a boyfriend

everyone's situation is individual but I don't get the "you can always earn more". That's never guaranteed. Possibly said by the type who buy everything they want and would consider me tighter than a gnat's arse 😂

That is the attitude dh and I generally have.

Which is also a big part of the reason we both choose to work part time days opposite each other.

This means there's always one of us home for the kids. But obviously, we earn much less as a result of it. We make it work and we manage on what we earn though 🤷‍♀️

You can't buy time in career progression either.

The reality for most (women) is that you have to choose between more time with your children and a senior career / rewarding job / high paying job.

This is why I always say stay at home with your kids for a few years if you want. Work can wait. It's just money.