To ask for best ways to offer support during bereavement?

[Carswell]

My mother lost her mother last week after a long illness. I was also very close to my grandmother. I am worried about her because my gran was the last immediate family member who lived locally. When it first happened I stayed with her for nearly a week.

Now I am back home (half hour drive) I am wondering the best ways to offer support. I don’t want to ask how she is every other day, because how is she supposed to answer? What else could I do to help?

So sorry for your loss 💐💐
What about getting some food delivered for her so she doesn't have to think about that each day? Either a standard supermarket shop or one of the meal prep services that do it all for you?

Just be there for her , ring her for a chat everyday that's really all you can do.

Having lost both my parents the thing I really remember is the people who were offering support a month after the loss.

Everyone comes out of the woodwork immediately and wants to talk and offer condolences and meals but then it's like you're supposed to be over it within 2 weeks.

The people who would still check in every now and then and make sure I was ok a month later or on the anniversary were the ones who really made me feel cared for.

From now to the funeral the number of things to do will carry her through. Prepare for a big slump after the funeral when reality hits.

Ring her regualrly and let her talk about what she's doing, and look out for things you could help her with. Has she registered the death yet? Would she like support for that? Be prepared to talk over funeral arrangements and all the associated decisions - it's good to have other people's reassurances tht you're making the right choices.

Later on, help with clearing the house, even just driving to charity shops and tip.

And don't forget about yourself. Who's supporting you?

I'm posting from the perspective of someone who lost their dad last week.