To say I'm not coping?

[Hollowvoice]

Both DC diagnosed ASD. Both high anxiety, EBSA and youngest also PDA.
It is currently an achievement if I get into work with both DC in school. Happens maybe one a week. Most days I stay at home for some/all of the day trying to get one or both of them to school.
I'm lucky I have a very understanding boss, I can WFH when I need to, make up time evenings/weekends etc. But I am definitely not doing my job properly and being always "on" whether on DC duties or working is exhausting.
DH does his share, he WFH a couple of days a week and is always here when I have to be in. Some days I just go to work and leave him to it. We tag team helping DC cos quite often one of them is annoyed with one of us so we switch around.

It's hard. It's really bloody hard every single day. Today youngest has decided they hate me and I really don't think I did anything wrong (and I usually think I do everything wrong!), there was a sleepover last night and I think DC is just overwhelmed/needs quiet time etc and I am the punching bag (having already facilitated the quiet time..)

Also I hate when the youngest kisses me. I know how horrible that sounds. I always have, I don't know why. I've never let them know. I just physically hate it. It's really hard right now cos they need a LOT of physical interaction/regulation and that means hugging and kissing me multiple times a day.
I never discourage it, it's something they need and helps them but currently I am really struggling to deal with it.

Sorry. I just needed to vent. Scroll on by!

This sounds so so hard and I really feel for you.

Maybe have a conversation with school if you can’t get your DC in and make sure there’s some support from school or any reasons they don’t want to attend are adequately addressed to make it easier?

It sounds exhausting but does also sound like you’re managing. I am genuinely filled with admiration for you and your DH.

I do think though that you are entitled to have boundaries regarding physical contact. Can you try “Don’t squeeze me so tightly, I might break!” or “OK, love fest over, I’ve got work to do!”. Maybe that could reduce the amount of time?

I don't have any advice for you I'm afraid.

Just wanted to say I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling at the mo. This sounds difficult, but you're doing a great job; all kids sometimes hate their parents for no reason. You're not alone! X

Just to say I hear you.

My youngest two daughters have autism.
I was called to the school over and over because they bit people,trashed classroom , got excluded and sent home continually.
Had to give up work because of it.
I really should have home schooled mine as the school admitted they "were on their knees".
My youngest used to pour water all over herself and lie screaming on the floor. I would like beside her trying to calm her
Her sister growled at people and tried to bite them if they visited the house.
Eventually,both daughters were put on Risperidone which helped somewhat.

Been there done that got the t shirt.

How old are they?

I'm sorry, that sounds so tough.
"Luckily" mine just explode at home.

13 and 11

They are at different schools. We've talked a lot to both schools and definitely one is more supportive than the other. There's lots of accommodations, some of which each DC can't or won't access, reduced timetable is about the only thing right now but I'm starting to think i might have to home ed.