Page 5 | In trouble at work

Dottiemay · 2025-02-01T18:15:55+00:00

There's been Teams interviews for a junior role at work. The interviews include an on the day task for the first half an hour of the interview. I'm not on the panel but my manager asked me to join the call at the start of the interview alone to introduce the task and say the panel will join the call in half an hour and will ask you to introduce the task. All fine. I did six interviews this week and I was on the call for max two minutes to introduce the task then left. The last interviewee had been scheduled at school pick up time. I'd asked around to see if someone could pick up my kid from school but couldn't. So I asked the school - where I've been a governor for many years - if I could come early to use the meeting room to jump on this call for a couple of minutes. That way I'd be at the school for pick up. The head said yes, no issues. When I got to the school, the head was away at a meeting and hadn't told the deputy, and the meeting room was being used for a safeguarding meeting. They offered me the school reception area but it was full of parents wanting to speak to staff. As I didnt have time to drive back home, I jumped in the car and blurred the background. Introduced the task and then left - took a minute or two. The candidate then sent my manager a screenshot of me on the call clearly in the car. My manager has now raised it with me and said we'll have to chat on Monday about it. I'm shitting myself. They know I'm a single parent. I start work at 7.00 and work through my lunch break to get an earlier finish so I don't think I've done anything wrong and who cares if the background was a car. But I feel like I'm in a lot of trouble. Do you think I've done something terrible?

Strawberryfruitcorner · 01/02/2025 19:25

I can’t believe someone did that to you, I don’t use this word lightly but what a C*NT!!!!!!!!!!

adviceneeded1990 · 01/02/2025 19:25

Dottiemay · 01/02/2025 18:56

I do get this and perhaps I should have been upfront. I think being a single parent can feel overwhelming and you're always trying to make all of your obligations. I was trying to sort it in a way that would mean I could do both and don't always want to say to managers that you're struggling to meet commitments for fear of being deemed a liability . And it would have been fine otherwise. Maybe in future I should be more upfront.

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You say you’re a single parent but then mention his Dad doing collections on other days? Couldn’t his Dad have swapped you on this occasion? That’s what my DH and his ex do when these things arise. It’s probably not a sackable offence but it also wasn’t the most professional decision. If they already know you do school run I’d expect a brief chat about it then to move on.

surreygirl1987 · 01/02/2025 19:28

If you have explicit permission for doing the school run at that time if you're supposed to be at work, then I'm surprised you were asked to do this task. Why didn't you just say 'that's when it's been agreed I do the school run'? If I was a candidate I would be a little surprised. Probably wouldn't raise it, but it does seem a little unprofessional. If you DON'T have explicitly permission for doing the school run at that time, then I would be concerned, yes.

Urgenthelplease · 01/02/2025 19:29

I'd tell the truth but hope the candidate doesn't get hired. I also agree with the internalised sexism comments. During covid we had a lot of issues with kids being sent home from daycare with coughs. My husband always got the "how cute, what a wonderful dad" comments if he was on calls with our daughters. I got the snotty comments from bosses about being distracted and colleagues avoiding any statement at all.

Namechangefordaughterevasion · 01/02/2025 19:30

The candidate is a total snitch. Not a team player. I hope the door doesn't hit them in the arse on their way out.

PennyApril54 · 01/02/2025 19:30

Do you think in any way she felt she got a poor experience/ a disadvantage? I can't think of any reason why someone would be such a snitch for no reason. For example, did you have a good signal?
I think just explain what happened and hopefully they'll understand.

Banyon · 01/02/2025 19:31

FTHC · 01/02/2025 19:18

Why apologise to the candidate?
Candidate should be apologising to OP for taking an unsolicited screenshot of her.

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That not the issue, is it?
is her manager wanting to talk to her about appropriateness the screenshot?

If she wants to continue positive working environment, it’s better to be willing to work together to resolution.
And not get combative about a not-employee.

Her company might feel that to attract high quality employees, they need to present a professional image snd that might not be employees interviewing in a car.

I’m 100% ok for her to read suggestions and make up her own mind how to not be in trouble in work.

hotfirelog · 01/02/2025 19:31

Everyone is allowed an emergency situation. Non issue for me with an explanation.
You didn't not turn up.
No impact on interview.
Private space.
No one else in car with you etc.
I'd not want to employe the candidate.

mirrorglitterball · 01/02/2025 19:32

Candidate is a weirdo.

in the grand scheme of things such a boring non-issue that I can’t understand anyone getting worked up about

mumedu · 01/02/2025 19:32

ExtraOnions · 01/02/2025 18:26

Honestly … if I was interviewing that candidate would be right at the bottom of the pile.

Agreed. This is not someone I would want to hire.

FictionalCharacter · 01/02/2025 19:33

If I'd been one of the hiring managers and a candidate sent me a screenshot of my assistant with a complaint, I'd have been very unimpressed. I'd have told them it's absolutely not acceptable to do that, and told them that whatever they were trying to achieve, that isn't the way to do it

OolongTeaDrinker · 01/02/2025 19:34

Poppyseeds79 · 01/02/2025 18:27

I'd say you did nothing wrong. You were in a private space with the background blurred. Nobody could overhear you and it's not a big deal. The interviewee sounds like a prat.

I agree with this, what is the problem here exactly? If you don't want to bring the school run into it, just say you had to leave your house as there as something going on - noisy neighbours, building work etc and your car was the quietest place. That candidate sounds like a real twerp.

JaneAustensHeroine · 01/02/2025 19:34

Ridiculous. As a manager I wouldn’t give two hoots that you were in your car. The candidate sounds like a nightmare - who would do that? Are they using this as an excuse for not performing well? Maybe your manager wants to get her story straight before she gives the candidate some feedback. Honestly, some people are crazy. You did nothing wrong at all.

RamsaySnowsSausage · 01/02/2025 19:34

This is outrageous. What on earth is the candidate thinking. I really can't think what outcome they expect? If the signal was bad then it was up to them to communicate and clarify at the time- I can't see what else they'd be upset about.

FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 01/02/2025 19:36

No, it's definitely better to tell the truth if your boss is likely to be understanding.

If not, lie. Fuck them. And fuck him.

Viviennemary · 01/02/2025 19:36

Should you have been at work when you were picking your child up from school? It would give a very bad impression if you were meant to be working, But were in the car picking up children and driving and on the phone. Shows really poor judgement.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 01/02/2025 19:37

Does your manager realise that this candidate has most likely taken screenshots of every member of the panel as well?

Handy way to be able to track somebody down, that.

surreygirl1987 · 01/02/2025 19:40

OolongTeaDrinker · 01/02/2025 19:34

I agree with this, what is the problem here exactly? If you don't want to bring the school run into it, just say you had to leave your house as there as something going on - noisy neighbours, building work etc and your car was the quietest place. That candidate sounds like a real twerp.

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See, this is an issue. If she has to lie about why she left the house, then she HAS done something wrong! If she had an agreement to do the school run at that time while working from home, then there's no need to lie...!

surreygirl1987 · 01/02/2025 19:40

Viviennemary · 01/02/2025 19:36

Should you have been at work when you were picking your child up from school? It would give a very bad impression if you were meant to be working, But were in the car picking up children and driving and on the phone. Shows really poor judgement.

Well hopefully she wasn't actually driving at the time. If she was, that would be much more serious!

HardenYourHeart · 01/02/2025 19:41

So many of my coworkers are on the go all the time and so are many of our clients. It's not always for strictly business reasons either. People have doctors appointments, etc. We don't use video when we are in the car, but it's almost impossible to avoid having to be on a Teams call while in a car at least once or twice per month and nobody bats an eye. This is just the reality of a lot of workplaces and we are all flexible and treat each other with trust.

This candidate didn't even know if you were doing anything wrong. For all he could have known, this sort of thing happens all the time and he will be expected to do the same, or at least put up with it, if he were to get the job. He sounds like he likes to make drama. When you go into the meeting I would point this out to you manager. Maybe only apologize for not clearing this before hand, but really, this candidate just doesn't sound suitable.

MelisandeLongfield · 01/02/2025 19:43

Take a photo of the inside of your car and start using it as your regular Teams background 😄

But seriously, the candidate is a plonker - you haven't done anything wrong.

Birdie280125 · 01/02/2025 19:43

whydoihavetowork · 01/02/2025 19:20

This would be perfectly normal in my company where we are all multi-site and travelling. Candidate clearly doesn't get out much.

Agree, if I was a manager I would be put off by this candidate

surreygirl1987 · 01/02/2025 19:44

HardenYourHeart · 01/02/2025 19:41

So many of my coworkers are on the go all the time and so are many of our clients. It's not always for strictly business reasons either. People have doctors appointments, etc. We don't use video when we are in the car, but it's almost impossible to avoid having to be on a Teams call while in a car at least once or twice per month and nobody bats an eye. This is just the reality of a lot of workplaces and we are all flexible and treat each other with trust.

This candidate didn't even know if you were doing anything wrong. For all he could have known, this sort of thing happens all the time and he will be expected to do the same, or at least put up with it, if he were to get the job. He sounds like he likes to make drama. When you go into the meeting I would point this out to you manager. Maybe only apologize for not clearing this before hand, but really, this candidate just doesn't sound suitable.

Edited

And if that's allowed and agreed, that's fine. What's not been clarified is if this is the way OP's job works.

IdaGlossop · 01/02/2025 19:47

Viviennemary · 01/02/2025 19:36

Should you have been at work when you were picking your child up from school? It would give a very bad impression if you were meant to be working, But were in the car picking up children and driving and on the phone. Shows really poor judgement.

She wasn't driving. She was stationary.

EvangelicalAboutButteredToast · 01/02/2025 19:48

Viviennemary · 01/02/2025 19:36

Should you have been at work when you were picking your child up from school? It would give a very bad impression if you were meant to be working, But were in the car picking up children and driving and on the phone. Shows really poor judgement.

Of course she wasn’t driving and on the phone! She was sitting in the car with a blurred background.