My toddler doesn’t do enough activities?

[Korr]

Ds 2.5 goes to nursery four days, then a day with me in the week to do soft play or food shop etc. Weekends sometimes swimming (not a lesson), walk, meal out, a national trust etc. Apparently by now he should be attending activities like rugby toys or swim class or something structured? Any opinions on this? We have no money left after nursery!

I've always enjoyed going to structured classes with my little boy (he's just about to turn 4). I don't necessarily think they are a waste of time/money.

We've done swimming, balance bikes, dance/acro, breakdancing, football, forest school style class, rhyme time and I'm happy to try anything else if it is at a time we can make. We still do swimming and football and might go back to the cycling class now that he's been riding his bike properly for a while- they do a mini mountain biking class which sounds hella fun!

Often it gives me ideas of things I can do with him myself; and teaches me how to be a bit braver and let him do things that would perhaps be outside of my comfort zone. I don't think I'd be as happy taking him into water without buoyancy aids if I hadn't seen what he (and I) are capable of in a safe environment. We go swimming whenever we get the chance because we both love it so much.

At this age you join the classes (and sometimes join in!) so it's still a quality time activity to do together. Swimming is one of the most bonding activities I can think of, and I'm sad now that he can swim a bit and float for short while by himself that he doesn't need me!!

But they aren't necessary, it's just what works for you. So there's no need to be doing them. It sounds like you are doing a load of amazing activities already.

I smell competitive parenting here!

Just do what works for you. I did baby sensory and all that jazz on mat leave but now I'm at work I personally don't want the hassle on a Saturday morning of getting out the house to do swimming or football (if DH wanted to do it without me I'd obviously be game!). My parents take DS swimming and he does preschool three days and with me it's often the park or the supermarket or a soft play. We do plenty of national trust and seeing family or friends etc. We might do an intensive week of swimming lessons in the summer holiday when he's 4/ when he can listen 😬 Everything else I'm going to wait until he shows an interest!

Ah. Well you can safely ignore that then. 😁

Children need time to chill and potter and just be. He's got tons of "structured time".
Many toddlers survive without it!

That's been my experience as well. I think the first time I had any from of structured activity was rowing club I joined at 14 and the membership fee was low enough for me to use pocket money to join. My parents didn't even know I was doing it until months later.

Well that someone at toddler class is probably one of those that spends a lot of time on social media and feels the need to keep up with everyone else that have friended!

In the real world, you just do fun stuff with your toddler. Jumping in puddles is fun! Making mud pies is apparently fun too! Baking, reading books, dancing to music etc... just do what is fun!

Toddlers don't need structured activities! He's in nursery 4 days a week - surely that's enough structure for a 2.5 year old? The rest of the time should be pottering at home, in the garden, playing outside in the woods, park, feeding the ducks... basically just enjoying being with you. He's got years ahead for doing classes - let him just be ☺️

A toddler needs to be running about , they don’t need to be playing football or rugby in any organised sense . It sounds to me like you are doing plenty , it’s competitive parenting

someone selling structured activities😋

Let me guess, someone's 2 year old is already fluent in 3 languages and working towards grade 8 piano or something (and that's in between lectures for their engineering degree). It's all BS. I think I sucked my thumb and watched Trumpton in my spare time at 2.

Save your money for school trips and afterschool clubs
you have a lovely set up

My now 13 year old DS didn’t like baby/toddler groups/classes pre school so we didn’t do them. He still remembers fondly the walks into town to get a magazine and sitting in the local cheap cafe to get a sandwich with me. The highlight of his first birthday was riding in a trolley on those travellator things in the supermarket. Not doing such classes has made no difference at all to him now.

I work 4 days a week and do Mini Movers (dance) with my just turned 2 DD on a Friday. She's one of the youngest (pre school) and she loves it - the best thing is her learning all the words to the songs and her language is really coming along. DH does swimming with her on Sundays as he missed out on all the groups during mat leave. Apart from that we make it up as we go along!

OP...all this 'children must have twenty thousand structured activities' is a fairly new, utterly ridiculous, money making scam!

Ask ANY parent of a child born pre-2000 (or possibly ANY parent with a modicum of common sense now!)

Read to your children, take them to the park and spend time in the outdoors with them. Teach them to swim. Kick a ball around with them. Clubs are not a 'requirement'...they are 'optional extras...if you want' 👍🏻

Oft fuck that. I see all my child's friends mum's running the kids off to do tennis, footy etc and I just wonder why they can't just go home and relax.
People have been sucked in to thinking they just do all these classes and they absolutely don't! Maybe when the child is older and can decide for themselves

The sort of activities he needs are - someone talking to him, someone playing with him, someone reading to him and someone taking him to the park. No one needs rugby tots!

Swimming classes at this age aren't really swimming classes, they are kids being bobbed about by their mothers in the pool with few songs and a bit if splashing. You aren't missing out in anything by taking him yourself. My kids didn't really interact with any of the other kids in the class until much later. As a pp has said, the class was more for me to fill my day and get me out of the house.

Absolutely not necessary at all. Sounds like he's doing plenty. I had one child who started an activity at 2 that they love more than anything and still do at 9, but mostly at that age it's just to fill time and sometimes not worth the cost. Don't worry about it at all at this age!

At 2.5 my ds went to nothing structured- he did nursery 2 days, my mum looked after him 1, preschool another and me the last. I took him to an under 5 stay and play at the library.

My dd started gymnastics at 2.5, but she's very different! She goes to a specific music and movement group once a week, and a nature tots thing another day.

Rubbish. Nursery is one long toddler class - they do art, games, exercise, play and socialising literally all day. When your toddler isn't there it's enough for them to have time with you.

The only thing that was important to me for my older girls and my current 4 year old was/is swimming lessons.

My 4yr old does her swimming lessons and that’s it for weekly classes. We do ad hoc stuff as and when they turn up. We do loads of ‘activities’ though as a family. Outdoor stuff, craft things etc.

Lol as a mum of 3 this made me laugh. DS3 is the most chilled of my kids probably because he got taken everywhere including shops, school runs, park trips, soft play, to watch his elder siblings swimming lessons because I had no alternative but to take him.

OP toddlers as someone who works with kids I can say toddlers do not need structure activities like rugby etc. The only real structured activities my kids ever got a toddlers was there swimming lessons but they were one to one and tailored to them. DC1 and DC2 still struggled to learn to swim whist DC3 is like a fish in water. Your doing a great job from the sounds of it.

My toddlers didn’t do any of those things! Playgroup a couple of days a week, playing at home, playing outside, going for walks, doing daily chores/shopping with me. Occasional trip out to something at the weekend

That's ridiculous, there is plenty time for activities when they get a bit older, I would say at least 4-5. If he is in nursery 4 days a week it will be much more beneficial for him to spend the time with you.