Street Harassment

[Gallstoned]

AIBU to think the vast majority of teenage girls have encountered some form of minor (or major) street harassment whilst they are still at school.

I talking about on a train or walking down the street, unwanted staring, comments, unwanted attention from adult men.

I definitely did, as have my DD's.

Is this unusual or very common.

YABU - Neither me or any of my friends encountered unwanted attention from men when we were still at school (under 18)

YANBU- I have or my friends encountered unwanted attention from men whilst we were under the age of 18.

I think it is hugely common and intimidating. Why do men do this?

10 out of 10 so far...depressing

Very common and clearly the men who are doing it know that the girls are under age. My daughter and her friends experienced it particularly when they were 14 and 15 - eg some horrible incidents such as men coming up and asking if they could unzip their hoodies to let them see what was underneath. So totally sleazy and I wish it was easier to have men prosecuted for this kind of behaviour.

That's so grim @MrsMalaga sorry to hear that.
My DD's had a man leer and follow them down the road when they were 11! They took refuge in a shop but were quite shaken.

I'd be astonished if it wasn't all girls (purposely saying 'girls' because thankfully the older I get the less it happens, and school uniform was by far the biggest trigger for this behaviour apparently).

@JazzyJelly do you think it's a power thing?

I've never had it happen while walking with either a man or my German Shepherd. Even when I was a very short, slight teen, it didn't happen with my (then) GSD.

@JazzyJelly
me neither.
Funny that.

This happens so often when a young girls is alone or with other very young girls

When I was a student (16 or 17) I got a holiday job in the local 5 star hotel. I was meant to be covering reception. The manager said he had ripped his trousers and could I sew them. I lied and said I couldn't sew. Left and never went back. WTF.

Didn't happen in the street obviously but this thread just reminded me of it.

yuk!

Totally about power and control.

Well done for getting the hell out of there.

Totally. Several times I also gave short shrift to grown men leering at my dd when she was about 14.

Yes unfortunately. To almost every female I know.

I've seen DD14 be leered at and yelled at from a van full of men while she was wearing her school uniform. It was repugnant

Age 14 in my school uniform walking home from school, every other day

Same age, in uniform walking dog after tea on my own, every.single. day.

Yes I had this pretty much every time when walking about, especially in the summer. But, according to a recent post on here apparently I should have been flattered/shrugged it off/made polite friendly banter as women were more hard skinned back in the day! If only having a hard skin could save you from potential physical and sexual violence.

If I was to start listing all the times a man had made a creepy move towards me from the age of about 12-13 onwards, we'd be here all day, I grew up in a busy city and walked and took public transport everywhere and it was just relentless.

I was so happy when I finally started driving and could escape some of it, mid 20s. They started on my daughter in her school uniform when she turned 12 or 13 too. When she was 18 and passed her test I gave her my car and took a car loan I could ill afford so she could drive around and at least be able to escape the street harassment of mindless predatory men some of the time.

This, too. We would go out shopping together and some freakish creep would be leering at her only to meet me standing in front of her with a glare on my face. I had to get security once because we were in an underwear shop, I was buying her a few nice girly things, and some vomitous goblin was standing at the door leering in at her.

Not that it matters, but she was a perfectly normally dressed, pretty little girl, if anything she tended to cover up more than show any flesh to try to avoid male attention.

I'm 70 and can't think of a single woman or girl of my acquaintance where this issue has been raised who has not had unwelcome sexual attention - leers, whistles, shouts, touching, from boys and men from the early teens onwards. Not one.
So we're talking late 60s to date.

Why do men do it? For the same reason dogs lick their genitals - because they can.

It’s bc they’re easy targets. Less likely to shout something back or react negatively. Its power. Younger men are usually more likely to do this in groups for back up if it’s an adult woman. It’s mainly about the approval of their peers and male bonding, the woman/girl is almost irrelevant. Also the school uniform isn’t necessarily a trigger for them being involuntarily sexually attracted to them - more like another indicator that they are likely too young to have the confidence to challenge them, and a ‘badge of honour’ if you will or stereotypical symbol - I’m leering at a school girl bc I’m a bloke etc.

They see young girls who they believe they can get away with intimidating. Yes, it's all about power.

Going against the grain- but absolutely never that I am aware of. Older now, but was conventionally enough 'pretty' when you get and genuinely have absolutely no recollection of any occasions as a school kid/ young adult that I was made to feel uncomfortable.

Same here. Never happened to me and I only left secondary school 5 years ago. As awful as it sounds, it does make me wonder if there is/was something wrong with me!

They probably assumed you wouldn’t take it. I wouldn’t take that as a negative!

This is a misconception. Guys don’t heckle, harass, follow, leer, assault or rape because girls are pretty.
It is not driven by lust or amazement at such beauty before their eyes.

It’s 100% about control, power, humiliation and objectification. In other words misogyny.

There was a brilliant work in the Tate Modern a few years ago with items of clothing worn by rape victims. There were jeans, jumpers, coats, hoodies, cardigans and pyjamas displayed on a wall. Amongst other things, it highlighted the ridiculous notion that men rape because of what women are wearing.

I am glad you never experienced it.