For asking to be put on the mortgage?

[Isthismykarma]

Posting for friend.

Friend has been with her DP for 2 years, she moved into his place 1 year ago. Not married, no children. Before that friend lived at home with parents.

Her DP has a shared ownership owning 70% of the property and 30% owned by a housing association that rent is paid to. Her DP pays the mortgage and they split the rent and bills. Because of this friend has managed to save a chunk of money.

Her DP eventually wants to buy more shares of the property but has never mentioned my friend being a part of this. He saves a little every month but realistically wouldn’t be able to mortgage the whole property even if he did get enough of a deposit to (need 5% of the remaining value).

Friend was wondering if it’s cheeky to ask him if she could be put on his mortgage then she would happily put down the money for the deposit and they can jointly own the whole property - no more paying rent. They could speak to somebody who can help them ring fence her DPs current equity and her deposit and then pay the remaining mortgage 50/50.

YABU - this should be led by her DP and she will see grabby
YANBU - it makes sense

It's not cheeky to float the idea. He may not realise she has that level of savings, or think it's grabby to ask her to use them for this. But they would need to be clear what this means. Is it a sensible financial arrangement that means they will jointly own a property that will appreciate in value and be able to stop paying rent? Or is it the first step in spending the rest of their lives together?

Either way, if they do it, they both need proper legal advice and to work out whether they own it jointly or half each. What happens if they split up? What happens if one of them dies?

They've been together 2 years. No way would I do this if I were him.

Would any of those factors changing, affect your opinion? They have spoken of becoming engaged this year, and both do want children in the future so there may come a time when they do get married and/or have kids.

Haha I she was asking me about it and I just said I’ll post on here if you want and she said yeah alright

Ah okay, so maybe it’s too early in the relationship to consider this, but perhaps in the future is what you mean?

Yes she feels very lucky to be paying so little rent

Of course it would be a good deal for her to go on the mortgage she has everything to gain and nothing to lose
he on the other hand has already paid some of the mortgage and presumably a deposit
has nothing to gain but a lot to lose

She would look at ring fencing the deposit and mortgage payments so he’d never lose out on that part, but the risk for him is that he could lose his entire home if they split up as he wouldn’t be accepted for the 100% mortgage. That’s the main factor stopping her from broaching the conversation with him she doesn’t want to look grabby.

After two years and no marriage on the cards I would just advise her to keep on saving as much as she can. It’s insurance for the future depending. Could be a future deposit for the two of them or something to help her if she needs to go it alone.

Sounds reasonable to me. She could buy the remaining 30%, register the split of ownership 30:70 with the land registry, and go on the mortgage paying 30% of the mortgage (or 50% if that feels fairer).

She would become liable for 100% of the debt though (both parties are liable for the full amount), so she'd have to trust him and the relationship. Getting married could be a good idea.

What's in it for him?

Together 2 years no way would I consider this if I was either your friend or her partner. Normally you would say go on the mortgage if you are subsidising the house. She is not it is allowing her to save, she is not financially disadvantaged.

Whilst a deed of trust can protect her share, if the relationship were to break down she would need him to buy her out (which he can't afford to do), or the place would have to be sold which could leave her financially tied to him for months.

I would suggest she continues to save. If she wants to get on the property ladder get a smaller place on her own, or put the money into high interest savings or investments.

2 years is too soon in my opinion to tie yourself to someone like this

He wants to stop paying rent rather than have 70% ownership but can’t buy the housing association out alone. He also would have to pay less monthly mortgage instalments as she would then start paying half the monthly payments.

This is my advice really. She could even look at a small one bed flat in a cheaper area as an investment property. In that case though would she share the proceeds because in a way he is facilitating that?

Just from personal experience I owned a property with an ex- he only owned a 10% share. When we split up he continued living with me until the property was sold (with me paying 90% of his housing costs), when we'd get an offer he'd reject it as too low. It was only the threat of a court order that eventually made him accept an offer. Yes you can ring-fence your deposit and make sure you are financially protected- but it is an absolute fucking cage. I would never recommend it to anyone as a 'good' option

Thanks for your perspective. I also jointly owned a property with an ex and it all went sour, I was lucky that we were both on the same page and accepted an offer quickly but it still is such a tie to somebody!

At the point they seriously discuss marriage, kids and a long term future, then this suggestion could form part of that conversation.

Prior to that, carry on as they are now.

PP just explained it much better than I could. Why would he want to get into such a web of legal agreements? It makes it sound grabby and that she's trying to pull something. She needs to stop thinking about getting a slice of his house and invest the money she's saving elsewhere.