Giving up cats

[Miserablehome]

I have come to the end of my tether with cats and I need to rehome them. I have asthma which never was a problem before in the past but I've recently adopted these cats and it has triggered my asthma. I have another long term health condition as well as I am likely to need hospital care. I'm not coping.

DC will be devastated but I can't cope. AIBU for wanting to rehome the cats? How can I let DC know that this may be for the best. Currently can't sleep as I've been cleaning the litter trays and its brought on my asthma.

Sorry this has happened. But if you had asthma, why did you take on more than one cat? I'd have thought this was far more likely to trigger your asthma.
Anyway, it's a shame but one of those things I guess. I hope the cats get an excellent home.

YABU cats are living creatures that stress easily. You should never have gotten them.

Get cuddly toys for your children.

Plenty of asthmatics have cats and cope fine.

I voted YABU because I don't understand why you have posted this. You have clearly decided that you are going to get rid of the cats. I don't understand what you hoped to achieve.

Don't mess around, take them to a shelter asap.
Wasting money and time on a garden room is only pushing the issue downhill.

Don't be tempted to put on Facebook/Pets4homes etc as free, please, some scumbag may take them for use as bait.

If it's since having your cats could it be an allergy to them? You can get medication for that now pereze I think, try that.
IMO the rescues are full & I wouldn't trust rehoming directly via the internet I'd try everything I could to solve the problem & keep them.

Your health is more important than having cats. They need to go to new homes.

Is there anyone in the wider family who could offer them a home, so your children could still see them?

I recently got myself a cat and found myself with the asthma dilemma myself.

I'm allergic to most cats and stay well clear. My asthma is solely triggered by animals or sport, so I have avoided both all my life and never needed an inhaler. For the one-in-5 year situation something brings it on, I borrow a family member's.
Then last year my parents got a bengal cat. I was sure i'd never be able to visit but to my surprise I was 100% fine. I lived in with house with him for a month while they went on a cruise, I totally fell in love with the cat. All fine. So finally i thought I'd found my breed!

Cue - my own bengal last November. Within 2 weeks I'm coughing and short of breath and absolutely beside myself with upset on what to do.

I've got inhalers from the docs, I'm a bit in two minds about having to take medication for the sake of the cat but I'm giving it a go. In a few more weeks I'll allow her outdoors and I'm REALLY hoping being able to have windows and doors open will improve the situation.

Otherwise me and my parents may have to do a cat swap!!

OP you have my sympathy.

Cats find rehoming stressful but only temporarily so. It will not cause lasting damage to your cat to rehome if you need to, but I'd be tempted to give yourself longer before giving up on the idea. It will be temporarily sad for your kid too, but also a lesson in funderstanding everyone's needs.

Also - if you haven't already, keep the cat out of the bedroom, that honestly makes a big difference!

Ah sorry, must be a horrible situation to be in.
I'm sure your children will understand (depending on their ages) if you explain it to them.

We got kittens (moggies) and had to return them 24 hours later because of my mum's asthma. The change in her breathing was noticeable so although it was a shame it was understandable.

I hope you've not had them too long as the younger they are the easier it is to re-home them.

Obviously the cats welfare is more important than a mum's who is run ragged and difficult health issues.

Unfortunately OP there are a lot of people who think just that. The "oh I love animals so much more than any people, people are awful and animals are amazing" lot.

Yes your child will be upset but come on - your health is FAR more important. Asthma is no joke.

All those people gleefully putting the boot in are ignoring the fact that op has another recently diagnosed health condition for which she is likely to need hospital treatment. (Never mind, op, just pop a couple of anti-histamines, that'll sort it, no need for hospital.)

If you have inhalers (NOT antihistamines) to manage your asthma, you may well find it soon settles as your body gets used to the cats. I have asthma, and new cats always set me off, as well as giving me hayfever-type symptoms (which I use a nasal spray for). Then once they've been with me a few weeks, I'm fine again, rarely needing my reliever.

It's why I much prefer a separate preventer/reliever - I can up my preventer if I'm looking after someone else's cat or dog, or adoptng a new cat.

But if you have decided that you don't want the cats, then it's better to rehome them and asthma will lessen the blow to your children.

If they're badly affecting your asthma, you may have to give them up. The people castigating you for this may not realise how badly cats can affect a minority of people with asthma. I've actually been in the position of having to tell parents that it wouldn't be safe for their child to go home until they had not just got rid of the cat, but also the carpets, and cleaned very thoroughly. The conversation was held on ITU, because the cat allergy triggered such a severe asthma attack that he stopped breathing. Bloody lucky to be alive.

You may want to consider using wood pellets rather than a clay-based litter.

If you have no alternative but to rehome your cats, please return them to the rescue centre from where they came. They may find a permanent home then together.

To echo some of the other posters here, please don't bring an animal into your home for your children. They will be understandably upset to see them go, but I understand your health is important.

Please don't use social media to rehome your animals either. You haven't suggested that you will I know, but it may be a temptation.

This. It will be far easier to cope with losing the cats then losing their mom to a asthma attack.

The OP still hasn't been back to confirm that they came from a rescue in the first place.

Has OP actually said the cats were from a rescue? There would be no problem returning them, isn't it in a contract? I suspect cats came from a friend or advert.

I had asthma as a teenager and got a kitten . This triggered new debilitating asthma and I had to use a pump four times a day sometimes more I was devastated coughing constantly and with a runny nose and itchy eyes . I was in the same situation as you but after two months and a tonne of anti histimine I stopped reacting to the cat at all . I now have two and I don’t react to them unless they sleep
in my bedroom when I wake up with itchy eyes. I don’t take or need any medication at all . I have heard lots of other people say the same.

Yes agree, the contract for my rescues said to return them to the rescue if anything changes regarding the adoption conditions.

How long have you had the cats?

Only because the first 3/4 weeks of having cats after a gap I thought we would have to return them. I had sleep sitting up and my allergies were crazy. I could barely breathe.

Then it settled, I'm still allergic and react if they scratch or rub their scent glands near my face.

Asthma is another kettle of fish though it's life threatening.

There's a food you can get that can reduce the allergens https://www.zooplus.co.uk/info/about/pro-plan-liveclear

Sometimes we have to re-home our much loved pets because something happens that is harmful to us and we can't control that.

I had to give my cat back because he had severe behavioural issues that we couldn't get to the bottom of even with numerous vet checks and professional behaviourists.

If we didn't have kids we may have been able to cope but I wasn't willing to have my children grow up in a house covered in cat poo and spray. I got some stick for giving him back because "we should just clean it up and what's the drama" "shouldn't have had children because of the cat" but several years down the line I know I did the right thing for us and him.

If you genuinely feel like you need to re-home your cats for the sake of your health then that's what you need to do and do it guilt free. You've been around cats before and never had an issue and as far as you were concerned your asthma had gone. I've never been allergic to dogs so I would quite rightly think it was fine to go ahead and get one.

We can't predict the future, we can just deal with the information we have from the past and the current and sometimes things go wrong. Animals move on, they are capable of being happy living with someone else.

I adopted a cat from a friend and he was just as happy with us as he was with her.

Don’t feel bad OP. I think you are doing the right thing . Your health is far more important than keeping pets who will be rehomed.

There are some people on Mumsnet who are mad when it comes to animals who will flock to comment.

Your children will understand .