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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To tell you about my dog

11 replies

justmeandmydog · 23/01/2025 11:54

Prompted by a survey that Mumsnet is currently running about how dog and cat owners look after their pets. The last question asks about what your dog means to you.

I'd like to tell you about mine. He isn't my fur-baby or child. He is my side-kick, wing-man, companion.

I was in a shitty relationship for 6 years, financially abusive and generally unpleasant. It was very lonely and my dog was beside me through that. When I made the decision to finally end things with my ex and told family and close friends, they were incredibly supportive and really encouraged me that I was doing the right thing.

The day my ex left however the support stopped. It was as if they went "she's done it now, well done" The thing is actually that's went things got harder. I was so lonely. Having someone around at the end of the day, someone (however shit) to talk to, or exchange a few words with). I suddenly went from having companionship to being on my own 7 days a week.

Friends and family had said they were supportive, but it was just words. But unless I called, or asked to do something there was nothing. After a few weeks of me always being the one to reach out I felt like a burden.

I then started dating again, and it was great. But the difference is, early days you might see them once or twice a week, but I missed that daily interaction.

Through all of this my dog has been there, making me smile, being dependable, accompanying me or trips to the pub or on a day out (when all my friends are too busy).

What do I want from this thread? Firstly, when a friend is going through a difficult time for people to realise the break up isn't the hard part; its what come next- the silence, the quite, the long hours alone. Being a good friend, isn't about always answering the phone, sometimes its about you reaching out so the other person feels wanted.

And secondly, when you see me and my dog in a pub or a cafe, yes I can leave him at home, but I don't want to; in fact I'd then probably stay at home with him. For me he is my support into the world, he isn't part of my family- he is my family. When people say I dont know why people have to take their dogs everywhere- well he's all I've got. And as I try to rebuild a life, he'll continue to support me and help me through, more so than anyone else ever has done.

OP posts:
StarDolphins · 23/01/2025 11:57

I feel exactly the same about my dog! I love him beyond words and he’s nearing the end of his life now. The love & joy has been immeasurable from him.

SpringleDingle · 23/01/2025 11:58

Mine is my camouflage. I am autistic and find speaking to people hard. The dog gives me somewhere to look that isn't at their faces (which I can't do) but which looks natural. He gives something easy to exchange a few words about. He is a dsitraction or a reason to leave the conversation quickly. Him leaning on my leg in a pub or cafe makes me feel calmer and I can always look down and stroke him if I feel anyone looking my way. Without having him to go with me there are lots of things I wouldn't do.

justmeandmydog · 23/01/2025 18:16

SpringleDingle · 23/01/2025 11:58

Mine is my camouflage. I am autistic and find speaking to people hard. The dog gives me somewhere to look that isn't at their faces (which I can't do) but which looks natural. He gives something easy to exchange a few words about. He is a dsitraction or a reason to leave the conversation quickly. Him leaning on my leg in a pub or cafe makes me feel calmer and I can always look down and stroke him if I feel anyone looking my way. Without having him to go with me there are lots of things I wouldn't do.

I love this, it is so empowering. A real partnership and team. Sending a head scratch to your dog!

OP posts:
Busywithsomething · 23/01/2025 18:21

Ours went into a quick decline after kidney disease was diagnosed. Desperate for another greyhound. My heart swells up when I see pictures of them. Now - without meaning to belittle infertile women's experiences - I think I understand what they mean about feeling broody..I just can't wait to have another dog. But agreed it's not fair while we are both still working. ----

To tell you about my dog
LaurieFairyCake · 23/01/2025 18:27

I adore mine. Their simple happy dispositions joined with their adoration of me just makes my heart physically hurt.

hookiewookie29 · 23/01/2025 18:33

We got a puppy 4 years ago for our daughter to help with her mental health. He's her absolute rock,and she has said that he's her reason to get up in the morning and if she didn't have him then she may not even be here .....they adore each other.

LouH1981 · 23/01/2025 18:54

I miss my beautiful doggo. He was pts on 19th December. A big handsome 15 year old Labrador.
Since bringing him home, I’ve been engaged, married, changed careers, lost my Dad, had two children, one miscarriage, lockdown and redundancy. He was absolutely my best friend. I swear we knew what each other were thinking. The pain of losing him is unbearable. The heart break is unreal.
I cuddled him as a pup when we brought him home and I cuddled him as he took his last breath. Dogs are flippin awesome and seem to find us just when we need them ❤️ Please give him a big, well deserved scritchy scratch from me xxxx 🐾

Enko · 23/01/2025 18:59

YANBU

Mine is my friend my main cuddle. My mischief maker. My daily laugh. I love watching his relationship with the children (all adults now) he adores them.

Dogs are the best and I'm loving hearing all thse good boys amd girls.

justmeandmydog · 23/01/2025 19:10

Busywithsomething · 23/01/2025 18:21

Ours went into a quick decline after kidney disease was diagnosed. Desperate for another greyhound. My heart swells up when I see pictures of them. Now - without meaning to belittle infertile women's experiences - I think I understand what they mean about feeling broody..I just can't wait to have another dog. But agreed it's not fair while we are both still working. ----

What a kind face. One day, when its right, they will send you another

OP posts:
Jackiepumpkinhead · 23/01/2025 19:26

I could not imagine my life without a dog, they are the most wonderful souls who just bring joy and no drama.

So nice to read a dog positive thread.

Busywithsomething · 24/01/2025 07:52

justmeandmydog · 23/01/2025 19:10

What a kind face. One day, when its right, they will send you another

Oh that's making tears well up. Yes he was so kind. Never known a dog like him. Thanks Justmeandmydog. All the best 🙂

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