The thought that counts?

[Mummmmo]

Right just disclaimer I’m not discriminating if someone is struggling etc I’ll just lay out the situation

2x DD with 2 weeks exact between birthdays. We know it’s tough and near Christmas, Dh has a big family but people want to buy so we say £20 max/gift card in a card is fine as due to them being so close to Christmas, they get plenty of stuff.

DD1 had her birthday, a close family member on DH side gives her the card with £20 in.

DD2 has her birthday, same family member gives her a card alone.

now anything might’ve happened I understand, however this family member has confided in DH in the past about close stuff so I feel if it was a money issue he could say listen bit tight right now. It’s fine as DD2 got loads it’s not that we need it

it was more just the principle and how it’s not been acknowledged

I would say if it was me oh sorry struggling right now or anything etc

or have they just forgot? Again no rudeness please I am just genuinely curious and I like fairness and feel DH’s family constantly forget DD2 (long story )

Probably forgot. This has happened with my boys too. One got £10 from an uncle, the other didn't, birthdays 1 month apart. Again, huge family (14 cousins) so probably an oversight rather than anything deliberate. Don't mention it, don't worry about it.

Yeh I’m just hoping and thinking it’s that!

I am a bit touchy over our youngest as like I mentioned briefly it feels DH family make less of an effort with her? Unsure why but that’s why I’m always wary

Did they maybe think that you meant max £20 for both children so they meant for the money to be shared?

Is dd2 quite young and maybe that's why they didn't think a cash gift is inappropriate?

You said there is previous history but I wouldn't mention anything related to a gift as they could just claim that you are ungrateful.

2x DD with 2 weeks exact between birthdays.

£20 was probably meant for both children to share but if that was the case, it really should have been made clearer by, for example, giving £10 to each of the children rather than £20 for one and nothing for the other.