To stop buying gifts for friend's daughter?

[Gemz406]

This.
My best friend since childhood (we're now almost 40) has 2 teenage daughters. One is the sweetest, kindest girl you could imagine. She always contacts me to say thanks for gifts (birthday and Xmas). The other daughter doesn't even acknowledge gifts I send for her. This has been going on for years and it's really starting to upset me. This girl (the one who never says thank you) is always rude and disrespectful in other ways. Shows no manners whatsoever.
WIBU to stop buying for the rude, ungrateful girl and just but for her sister?

YANBU. Do you have kids? Does friend buy for you / your kids?

How old are both girls? Might be time to stop buying for both of them as it’s likely your friend will not like it if you buy for one and for the other.

Does your friend not pull up her daughter on being rude and disrespectful? She’s not much of a friend if she just sees it happens and doesn’t stop it.

Yes my friend buys for me 2 kids and they always thank her. If they didn't want to say thank you then I'd ask her to stop buying for them.

Only buy for the nice child who is grateful. Will be a lesson in how not to be a spoilt brat for the other

In that case, could you tell your friend that you think it’s time to stop the present exchange as the kids are getting older?

I don’t think you can buy one and not the other at least without expecting a conversation with your friend as to why… which would be likely not well received.

So you could either say nothing and continue and try not to let it bother you, stop buying for either and just give a generic excuse as to why, or have the conversation BEFORE buying just one gift and try to explain your predicament. (Depending how good a friend she is and whether you can somehow tactfully explain).

Can you just agree with your friend that ye both stop buying gifts for each others kids, it has to stop sometime anyway and her daughters are now teenagers

After 16 or 18 I think it would be fair to continue exchanging cards or gifts with one but not the other if you want to. Prior to that, of course it's up to you, but it passes the problem to the sisters or the mother and may cause problems. Remember that we don't all have sunny dispositions, easy teen years, or a smooth passage through life. Hopefully this young person won't get stuck in the role of being negatively compared with her sister. I guess the gifts may not be wanted though.

I’d stop buying for the ungrateful one and tell her mum why. If she doesn’t like it tough. But you do have to be prepared to lose the friendship if she gets the hump.