To think that no-one, in the history of humans...

[AMurderofMurderingCrows]

has ever calmed down when someone has told them to calm down?

I see so many threads on here with posters telling each other to calm down and it kills me every time. Poor Barbara was just wanting a wee rant about her neighbour and her bins and before you know it there's a gaggle of posters telling her to calm down 😂

YABU - I am so grateful for someone to tell me to calm down as I would never have thought of that myself and I calm down immediately

YANBU - calm down? Who the fuck are you telling to calm down?

Like a red rag to a bull for me

When my DH has said it in the past I've genuinely wondered if he thinks it's groundbreaking advice that I may not have considered 😂 does he think he's offering up a genuine pearl of wisdom and I'll be really thankful?

I agree, nothing more annoying. And yet I have been guilty of saying it myself!!

I've only ever said it once in my life and I felt immediately embarrassed by what a dick I sounded like so I've never said it again.

‘Turn any sofa into a sofa-bed - just by telling your partner to calm down’…

I’m normally perfectly calm already when DH tells me to calm down. It’s completely enraging and has the opposite effect 😂

Ditto.

Patronising bollocks. Totally the opposite effect on me. In fact just reading the words "calm down" triggers me!

I've actually never had a problem with the phrase. I totally understand the red-rag-to-a-bull reaction, as I have that with other things (eg when my DH tells me something makes me look "like you value comfort over aesthetics", my general response is to buy two of the thing), but I don't see it with "calm down". I've never had it said to me as I don't often find myself not calm. And I've never said it to an adult (no grown person needs another person telling them what to do), but when DS is losing his mind panicking over being late or forgetting something, I'll totally tell him to calm down, chill, it doesn't matter. Seems to work!

YANBU. We are all human and need to let off steam. I think it lacks emotional intelligence (unless done in a sympathetic way)

I think the only way I might appear to 'calm down' from it being said is at work, or perhaps a larger social event. I would see it as evidence that I might be making a fool of myself, and so try and reign it in. But inside, I'd still be fuming 😬.