New neighbours cat

[butterflycatching]

Not so much an AIBU, because I am not going to change my mind, but it has been playing on my mind for a few days now.

I moved into a new-build a few months ago. I was the first one to complete, and the development has been gradually filling up. I have the house on the end of the development and next to me is woodland.

New neighbours moved into the house next door last week and popped round- I thought to introduce themselves. But, they actually asked if before I let my dog out in the garden if I would check that their cat wasn't in my garden so it doesn't get hurt, and if I would consider removing the pyracantha (spiky plant) I have planted on the woods side fence so their cat can use that as access to the woods.

I told them no, I had planted that for security, but I would happily plant more along their fence side too if it will keep their cat away from my dog. I then got a whole explanation of they were hoping to encourage the cat to use my garden side towards the woods for roaming- rather than the other gardens which eventually lead up to the road. I was left thinking they thought I was very difficult.

I am not wrong in thinking this is bonkers and entitled? I can't be checking the whole garden for their cat every time I let the dog out. And you can't train a cat to roam in a particular direction anyway!!

I’m a cat owner. Your neighbours are being completely unreasonable - they have no say in your behaviour, the pets you choose to have and the plants you grow (unless it’s of course going to damage their property - which your plant won’t). If they don’t want to live next door to a dog then they need to buy a detached house with no neighbours - even if you didn’t already have a dog you could at any point in the future and they get no say in that.

i understand their anxiety regarding their cat getting hurt - and id never want any animal to be hurt- but that is what you weigh up when you get an outdoors cat and choose where to live. You can’t expect people to change their behaviour/ property to facilitate that.

im a bit surprised that on your first interaction they’ve been so cheeky! You haven’t built up a relationship yet for them to be able to ask favours!

They're batshit. And I doubt their cat will adhere to their demands either.

I can just imagine Tiddles deciding it doesn't like the woods anyway and other people's gardens are so much more interesting. I can picture it fence-walking like a pro, deciding which garden it will grace with its presence today.

You were absolutely right to say no to both pieces of batshittery. The cat will be quick enough to vacate your garden when the dog goes out (and may decide not to bother coming in at all), and they're effectively asking to treat your garden as a corridor for the Great God Tiddles. No, it's YOUR garden, fuck off!

God only knows what their next demand would have been if you'd said yes! Because they clearly think their wants should have precedence over everybody else's.

You're absolutely not being unreasonable! Your new neighbors' requests are both impractical and entitled. Here’s why:
Their Cat, Their Responsibility: Cats are free-roaming animals by nature, but if they’re worried about their cat’s safety, it’s their job to manage that—not yours. Expecting you to survey your garden every time your dog goes out is a massive overstep.
Your Property, Your Rules: Your garden is your space. You’ve planted the pyracantha for your security and have every right to maintain it. The idea that you’d remove it or adjust your landscaping to suit their cat’s convenience is unreasonable.
Training Cats? Good Luck: Cats are notoriously independent. The idea that they can train their cat to roam in a specific direction is wishful thinking at best.
You Offered a Reasonable Solution: Offering to plant more pyracantha along their fence to keep the cat away from your dog was generous and practical. It shows you’re willing to accommodate in a way that works for both of you—but it’s on them to protect their cat.
It seems like they're trying to shift their responsibility onto you, which isn’t fair. If they think their cat's safety is at risk, they might need to explore other options like keeping it indoors or building a cat enclosure. You’re well within your rights to set boundaries.

As a cat owner, they’re being utterly ridiculous. The very notion you can get your cat to follow your preferred route anywhere is genuinely funny, and that’s without commenting on how unreasonable they’re being expecting you to do anything about it!

I'm a cat owner and they are bonkers.

Pyracantha is great for security, and the berries are great for birds. Plant a row of them along the wood edge.
Just ignore the cat, and the neighbours!

Cat owner here and I voted YANBU.

If they are that concerned - keep the cat in.
If you let the cat out (which I do) you accept that you have no control over the plants, animals or people they come into contact with.

A bit cheeky of them, really.
Maybe suggest they instal special fencing around their garden to keep their cat in their garden.
Especially if they are that worried about the cats safety.

these people are arseholes

I've also got a cat and totally disagree with your neighbours request. Their cat, their problem.

And if they were that bothered about access to the woods, then maybe they should have snapped up your house first!

I too am a cat person and agree this is your neighbours' problem not yours.

Hopefully your saying no to both requests will mean they aren't going to make any other ridiculous requests

Hahahahaha. You need to tell them to have a word with the foxes that live in the woods (even if there aren't any) and ask them to leave the cat alone too.

Some people!

And thank goodness you do have a dog so you hopefully won't have to deal with their cat's poo.

Cat's are nippy little fuckers! The ones I my garden always beat the dog to the back fence. It'll give your guy some exercise!

I wouldn’t check before I let my dog out because he would be absolutely overjoyed to potentially befriend a new cat however, if he didn’t like strange cats, I would check as I have and love cats and would never want one to be harmed. The plant thing is batshit though!

YANBU, they are CFs. I would put citrus peel with eucalyptus oil there. It deters cats because of the smell but doesn’t harm them.

If the cat really wants to go to the woods it will find its own way. It will also leave the garden of its own accord if it doesn’t like the dog! They sound a bit bonkers.

It is hardly your problem they didn’t know they were buying a property next to a dog. It’s also irrelevant. They still don’t have the right to make demands on you. They are essentially asking you not to let your dog out if their cat is in your garden and to rearrange your garden.

Have you got an XL Bully? If not, Yanbu.

Cats aren’t bothered by Pyracantha anyway. We had a big one growing up the previous house, and the cat used to sit in it.

Mr Tiddles thinks your neighbours are nuts.

Cats roam everywhere. They are contrary and make their own choices.
Mine goes at least 10 houses away in every direction.
Am I going to knock on every door in the vicinity and check their plants and dog status?? Of course not!!
The cat will decide where it wants to go, and if it doesn't like the environment it will go a different way.
Totally bonkers and complete CFs.
In fact it feels like they must have been trying to wind you up for some reason.

Honestly just when I thought people couldn't get crazier I'm proven wrong! You haven't been unreasonable at all. If they didn't want neighbours with a dog buy a house in the middle of nowhere! I don't want to live next door to a cat (given the choice) and when we bought our home our neighbours didn't have a cat, but now they do. If they are that concerned they need to find their own solution like a catio or cat proof fencing. They are bonkers!

If they bring it up again, tell them to take responsibility for the animal they bought and cat proof their garden.

My neighbour’s cat used to spend house snoozing in our garden. Haven’t seen the sweet thing since we brought our dog home. Cats are very smart and will now to stay clear now

Ha I have two cats (and a dog) and never heard of anything so ridiculous.