Residential trip to France age 10 too young

[J578]

My 10 year old is due to go on a residential trip to France at the beginning of year 6 (this sep) he will still be 10.
it’s for 5 days, going ny coach so around a 9 hr journey.
my son isn’t too keen on going so we haven’t paid the deposit yet, but worries he may miss out.
AIBU to think this is a bit young to be doing an overseas residential?

I went to France on a 5 day school trip when I was in year 6. Some year 5 children came too. We have a brilliant time. I have very fond memories of our trip. I'm sure the school has carried out the necessary risk assessments, etc. That said, if you don't think your child will enjoy it, and they don't want to go tjen don't send them.

My DS did a 5 night residential in France in the autumn of Yr6 when he was still 10 - loved every minute, had a great time. It really depends on the individual child and whether you think they will cope - but don't let your own anxieties colour your judgement, because 10 is absolutely not too young for many.

@Dithercats I understand entirely why trips abroad might be off the table for a variety of reasons, but it seems very sad and quite controlling that your DC “know not to ask” for a trip abroad. Surely within a healthy family dynamic members of the family feel able to raise things, suggest things, ask for things? Even if ultimately they cannot have them, the dialogue around matters is surely important?

OP I do not think year 6 is necessarily too young. But it’s very child specific. Two of my 3 would have been ok. One most certainly would not. In reality they did UK trips in year 6 and one went abroad in year 7.

We'll don't send him then if you're worried

'He has focal epilepsy, which is well managed. But if he ended up in a French hospital without me that worries me a lot!'

You'd have to go and collect him yourself from France because the teachers would be busy looking after all the other DC if he did have an episode

If you're happy for him to go make sure you take out your own separate travel insurance for him. I did that for my DC for all school trips just in case. French hospitals are excellent so he'll be fine

I'd send him

Also why on earth would send him if he's not keen

My ds did a residential in France sort of mid to late y6 when he was still 10 (July baby). I hated every single second. They posted pics regularly and before he went we discussed a hand signal for to show he was happy in the pics, which he promptly forgot! By all accounts he had a great time, but I missed him horribly.

I think that’s great. You must be more south than us. In the late nineties I went as a year six (but a summer born so still aged ten) to the French alps from north west England on a coach with school. 24 hour drive. We had great fun. I wish my kids school did the same but he gets two nights away!

He will be gutted he missed out once he hears how much fun everyone else had. He definitely should go.

Nope, not joking! We’re in Northern Ireland and I’d struggle to think of a school local to us that doesn’t take a doctor on their ski trips due to the injury risk. It’s a good idea and a nice safety net in my opinion. My best friend’s DH is an anaesthetist and he went with DD’s school most years! Also remember quite a few GPs with kids in the school who volunteered. @BBQPete

I'm definitely a bit of a helicopter parent although I try not to be. I think it's too young

I'd be scared of him missing out though. I'd fly as a family and get accommodation nearby. Drop him where they are staying and make him aware that we are nearby should he want to stay overnights with us. I'd go about having a nice time whilst we were there.

I appreciate this isn't in everyone's budgets but this would be my solution.

How lovely. Pack 'em off.

It's not too young but will depend on the child. If yours doesn't want to go he should be able to opt out.

I don't think it's a case of 'too young', OP.

Some children aren't able to cope away from home/mum until they're a bit older - it's developmental. I was one of them (was always homesick but was signed up to do orchestra residentials etc. from a young age).

DS1 is AuDHD and didn't want to do the Y6 residential. I left it open until the last minute but he was adamant he wasn't going. He needs lots of downtime/alone-time and I respected that. He's now keen to go on Y7 residential.

Your DS will be ready in time.

Oh Lord!

You would really do this? You'd look completely unhinged.

My dd didn’t want to go on her residential, so I didn’t make her. She never felt she missed out & all I ever heard from the parents of the other children was that their children said it was boring and they had to wait around a lot.

However, your child enjoyed the three day residential so he may well regret it. I’d gently encourage I think, but like you, I’d be very anxious about it.

Sounds like you need some help for your anxiety.

Oh id have been so embarrassed at that age if my Dad had done such a thing. Cringe

Pretty standard trip for year 6 here.
2 of mine went and loved it. My other one didn't go and felt like she missed out but knows she wouldn't have coped.

S4 it often is common to go overseas. It's unheard of where I live for them to go before secondary age.

Its up to each parent but I would not have been happy with my child going abroad without me at that age.
DD did a similar trip in Y8 and that was fine

Y6 here was UK based and although my confident 11 year old enjoyed it over all, they were homesick. For me, 5 days in France, with a very long journey is too much for Y6. Even Y7 I would be concerned. Of course it depends on the child but I feel they need to be able to completely look after themselves and be pretty streetwise. No teacher can possibly look after all those children, as a parent would, in a foreign country. I feel for the teachers.

We do a guides trip every other yr to Disneyland Paris via coach. Age 10 plus. It’s a very popular 4 day trip.
If you think he’s too young don’t sign him.

I've never heard of an overseas residential from primary children! Is it an exchange (staying with a local family) or in accommodation all together with teachers? If the former or would be an absolute no from me at that age!

We went to the IOW in middle school and my DC's had 5 nights on the IOW too. Semi abroad!

@lompi our school wouldn't let parents do this as all the children need to be treated equally and would be upsetting for some if their parents weren't nearby when you were for your DC

Do they? I’ve never heard of schools taking doctor?!