My boyfriend not spoken to me for over a week

[Lufclfc]

Hi just after some advice been with my boyfriend for Over 3 years we don't live together as both had our owe homes before meeting earlier 30,s he bought a house last year and moved from his flat and told me to move in after buying it . He didn't ask before buying or show me the house before doing this . I have been hard work this last year I had a miscarriage and then ended up getting sectioned for a month due to ptsd all OK now.
but just to give background I know I been hard work .I had a few family deaths and legal issues so he , so we only seen each other one a week for a while now I am my mums full time carer he now not spoken to me for a week I have no clue why.
I messaged and called but not replay I just don't know what going on and not a clue how to deal with this when I was sectioned he never come to see me in hospital and only texted my family member one to check in . I just don't know what to do I do my best to support turning up to family funerals ,going to see him the day after I come out of hospital to be moaned at that I am hard work I we haven't sex in ages he left me to have a DNC with frenids support cos he had to work ( was his child) just not a clue what going on can anyone offer insight on to what I can do better going forward thanks please be kind frist time poster and I know I am hard work thanks

You deserved better from this man when you were in hospital losing his baby. You deserved better when you were in hospital suffering with your grief. And you deserve better now. You deserve love, compassion and understanding. Any decent partner would offer you that. You're getting so much less than the bare minimum.
It's hard just to be ghosted like this because it provides no closure. I hope you can take the advice from previous poster who suggested you tell him yourself that it's over - and then block him.
I am very sorry for your loss. Please try not to think of yourself as 'hard work'. You were grieving and unwell. Give yourself the grace and kindness that he did not.

Thanks all I have now booked him not messged again just bloked as you say whatever the reason he made his mind up and not told me so it is what it is its annoying as he 33 so you think at the very least he would be able to say i even asked him about the mh issue being a problem as it a lot to deal with he said no all OK bur officially his actions for whatever reason say something different have a good day all

100% agree with this. You need to forget him and focus on your own wellbeing.

He’s no longer your boyfriend. Block him and refuse to be treated like you aren’t worth an explanation.

Narcs do this when you need them most. Silent treatments are their fave little game, just to let you know they see you as worthless.

My mother was literally dying in a hospital and my father dgaf, for shits and giggles. They’ll drive you to suicide if you let them.

So sick of reading about these fckn men. Get the 💩 GONE

And after three years, you’ll have a trauma bond going so please go study up. Don’t be like me, thinking you’re having a mental breakdown when you’re really with a gaslighting, manipulative self esteem wearing POS for years.

You've described yourself as hard work 3 times. Let me guess, that's what he he tells you.

He didn't visit you after a miscarriage and a breakdown? I'm sorry to say, he doesn't love you and he's a nasty, selfish prick.

Don't contact him, don't let him worm his way back into your life. Focus on your own mental health, self esteem, friendships and interests.

Im so sorry for your loss.

I didn't want to read and run, you've had some good advice here and I hope you now get the time to spend taking care of yourself and building up your self esteem. You're not hard work, you've been through a very tough time and to be fair so has he, it's not just your loss and grief is a complex emotion and it can cause great rifts in relationships.

Do take care of yourself you are valid and worthwhile.

You're not hard work

You've had a terribly hard time thrown at you and you've had a lot to cope with, with no support from him

Please get rid of the horrible man and look after you 🥰❤️

Good that you've blocked him. You have enough to deal with without worrying about a man who shows no care for you and may actually have contributed to your breakdown.

This times a million.

I'm so sorry for what you've been through.
You're not hard work. A kind and loving BF would have supported you and at least visited you when you were sectioned even if he didn't understand MH( I have been there)
As for you going through a miscarriage alone. That is disgusting and unforgivable.
One text saying I'm done we are over.
Prioritise yourself and surround yourself with those who value you.
I promise you, your MH will improve and your confidence will grow without him.
Wishing you well.

None of the things you describe that you have been through make you "hard work".
This man is not kind and is not good for you, keep him blocked and enjoy the rest of your life.

Please read a book called it's not you by dr ramani it might change your life

'I've been hard work' my ex made me feel like this. What you should be made to feel is 'I've had a tough time and I've been through a lot and I deserved a lot of care and support'

What is the point of him he's not a partner he's so so very cruel

This. He's not the one for you.

"Do better" by not speaking to him either, ever again. Why do you want to have a relationship with (let alone be pregnant by) someone who plays such infantile games? And why do you seem to assume that he gets to call all the shots and you have to go crawling? You don't need him.

He is NOT your boyfriend. Sorry, but true.

OP I hope you're starting a new week with new resolve.

He's proved he doesn't want to be with you.

Time to grow your self respect and independence, hard though that is.

All the best. Stay strong.