To think she didn’t need to be rude about my hair?

[moccachovva]

I went for a consultation for my hair this morning and I felt like I encountered just rudeness.

As I sat down in the chair she immediately said “is that an extension I can see?” And lifted it up. Erm … yeah it is but maybe give me a chance to speak first? I’m not hiding the fact I have extensions in.

She immediately dissed the quality of my extensions, and when she said I’d need to buy brand new ones from her from a brand I wouldn’t ever touch she got really snotty when I said “I don’t want to use that brand”. She talked about bleaching my hair and I said no and then she said the state of my hair she wouldn’t put bleach anywhere near it.

Aibu? I want the truth as you need to know what’s realistic. But I think slating something so much that I felt so self conscious (there was one other customer in there who had no choice but to listen as it was deadly silent in there)

Exactly. It was the “is that an extension I see” like I was trying to be sneaky - I hadn’t even had chance to say anything apart from “I’m here for the consultation” … and she said with such distant “where did you purchase these from”

Eurgh, I just left feeling so shit. Like you said I don’t need to be given compliments but I don’t need to be made to feel worse.

I agree. She likely just didn’t want to do my hair for whatever reason .. not enough profit for the work maybe.

Thankfully I’ve been to enough hairdressers (I move around a lot due to work) to get a sense now when they just don’t want your business.

She was rude and there's no need for that. I would be done with her.

I find this a lot from hairdressers I’m 46 and I’ve found as I’ve got older they seem to want me to settle for boring colours, don’t want to listen to me about what I want or try to do what they want. The owner of the hairdressers told me my long hair was like a little girl, it was shoulder blade length and v good condition etc she was too busy sucking up to all the staff and being cool than actually paying attention to me. So that was the end of that, it’s not cheap and I think there are a lot of hair people who don’t really care. My search for someone who does and is good continues, just don’t want anymore expensive mistakes

YOU might not be wasting your time and money, the hairdresser certainly is.

Extensions obviously change a lot of things you can or can't do. She can't guess if your hair is too damaged for bleach without seeing you, but she can know what is possible or not with extensions, it sounds obvious it was a complete waste of time

🤦‍♀️ Stop embarrassing yourself by arguing a point everyone knows you’re wrong on.

They offer free consultations. If that loses them money then they need to change their business model. I think you don’t quite understand what a consultation is and what it’s about …. You also know they do consultations whilst they have other clients in and only see you when for example their hair is processing and they have “free time”.

Extensions change nothing sweetheart on what you can and can’t do. Because guess what they come out (wow imagine that?!) and you also pay around £85-£100 for that service. She could also easily see my actual hair.

It wasn’t a waste of time. I could have booked in with her to have a new colour, extension removal and new ones put in - I’d expect that to cost around £600-£800. But her attitude made me know I will not be going ahead with it.

You clearly know nothing about hair or services provided.

you do sound like such a lovely customer, I cant' for the life of me understand how the consultation went badly 😂

Oh yea the typical response on aibu when there’s no better come back than “oh you sound so lovely” or “you sound unpleasant”

Said by someone who doesn’t know me beyond a few words on a screen. Now stop making yourself look silly and leave the thread - off you pop. I’m sure you’ll continue to hang around but you will be ignored as I actually have a social life and I’m out to dinner with lovely friends.

"off you pop" 😂

Loving the passive aggressive replies when someone dares disagreeing with you. It's a non-issue, you won't see the hairdresser ever again. You can move on.

I can’t speak for everyone obviously, but I’ve booked consultations before and not mentioned I have nanobead extensions in until I get there for the consulatation, never been an issue. The hair dressers I went to did have their own extensions which were a different brand and fitting method to mine, but they didn’t even try to get me to have mine taken out etc. They were great, managed to do my hair and my extensions into a silver grey colour. It took around 5-6 hours as it took a lot of time to do my natural hair and then the extensions at the same time but making them match 😂 I guess it depends if you were asking them to just do your hair or do the extensions too, they might not want to incase they ruin them and become liable or something.

Wow! OPs responses are next level.
Bullet dodged, I’d say.

Eugh she sounds rotten. She’s defo not for you.

Hair dressers are really funny about using different people for extensions and colour and styling. Some offering extensions aren’t even qualified hairdressers these days. I tend to go to the same person for everything and there is no problem. If I turned up with extensions to my usual hairdressers he would definitely ask me about them and would certainly make comment if it’s not a brand he is on board with. Don’t feel bad. Just move on and find one that works for you.

i wouldn't return.

Consultation should mean assessing the situation and finding out what the client wants, what their expectations are... and then working out if they're reasonable or if there are issues with that.

At that point you tactfully discuss why xyz won't work/isn't possible, if you need to.

Im not a hairdresser, im a dog behaviour consultant but the same shit applies - don't upset the client, make them feel like shit. If they've made poor decisions in the past, only bring this up, tactfully, if its totally relevant and necessary.

No one wants to spend time with or hand money over to someone who makes them feel like crap!

She's trying to sell you services and products that will result in the most profit for the business. She's doing this by trying to convince you that you have an 'issue' or something substandard so you become concerned and allow her to 'fix' you at a cost. Don't take it personally. Don't fall for it. Don't go back.

Unfortunately some hairdressers have to act like they are the only one who knows anything about hair and all previous hairdressers you have used were shit. I’m lucky to have an amazing hairdresser but even though I’m always happy with what she does my DH has a friend who is a hairdresser and every time I see him he starts critiquing my hair and it really pisses me off - I would never use him and he does his own wife’s hair and it’s shit but I’d never say that because I’m too polite. It’s important you find someone who isn’t an overbearing twat and I’m sorry they made you feel this way, there are plenty of good ones out there. Don’t go back to this one and Good Luck finding someone nice who wants to make you look fab.

Definitely find another
I have the best hairdresser and won't change now. He knows what I mean when I try and explain stuff, listens to me, sits next to me instead of standing over me for a consultation and generally works miracles

I was having a really bad time once, he took one look at me walking in and handed me a coffee and a puppy

I come out feeling lighter and happy

My mum always says that hairdressers will always slag off the work of the hairdresser who came before! if you don't like her don't go to her. She's a bad fit.

The problem is that I would think what’s the point. If my hair is so bad then I will live with it

Why would someone return and pay money to someone like that

Negging only works on certain people who .

The rest will just think

Rude or

Whatever

and move on

Only been to a hairdresser a few times in my life as an adult and remember one hairdresser saying what a good cut my previous hairdresser had done

Told her I cut my own hair with wallpaper scissors from B&Q