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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH has booked and paid a deposit for a hair tattoo without telling me

49 replies

Coffeequeen123 · 15/01/2025 20:45

AIBU to be annoyed about this? He looks great for his age and has been bald since the day I met him, but I guess I have the odd bit of injectables now and again so I can’t really talk! It’s just he’s not mentioned this to me before today at all, and booked it without even checking with me first.

He said his mate from work has had it and it looks good but I’ve been googling and there’s some bad work out there which I’m worrying about. Do you know anyone who looks ok with it?? Trying to make him think this through first

OP posts:
barelybold · 15/01/2025 22:36

Weirdly my brother had this done recently it must be a new trend? We all thought he was going mad 😂 but the result actually looks good! Make sure he researches the place. He had it somewhere called Replikhair in Manchester I think but there seems to be loads of places offering it now

EliflurtleAndTheInfiniteMadness · 15/01/2025 22:36

Mentioning it before hand would be nice, but it's his body and he doesn't need to check with you first before he does this.

Catsbreakfast · 15/01/2025 22:39

StMarie4me · 15/01/2025 22:02

I think there's many men who aren't keen on fillers, lips, tattooed eyebrows, Botox etc but not their choice and neither is this!

Show quote history

Exactly, lots looking like they’re on duck hunt but have an issue with their partners having equally as unreasonable procedures done.

LostittoBostik · 15/01/2025 22:40

devilspawn · 15/01/2025 22:32

I know a multimillionaire who had it done, no one realised until he said that it wasn't hair. It looked fine.

Yeah the money might be the key here....

Glockenspock · 15/01/2025 22:43

Menopants · 15/01/2025 21:42

I get it, I would not want a man with hair tattooed on his head

I didn't even know fake hair tattoos were a thing! It might fool the eye in a dimly lit room but I'd imagine it would look ridiculous on closer inspection in broad daylight.

Then again maybe I'm holding an unfair opinion on what constitutes manliness as I also consider men who dye their hair rather ridiculous. It looks awful when the roots are growing through - instant ick.

2025willbemytime · 15/01/2025 22:43

I'm disappointed there are no photos.

RomComPhooey · 15/01/2025 22:43

I plucked my first grey eyebrow hair recently. I said to DH that it must look strange if you’ve had eyebrow tattooing and then your colouring changes with age. Isn’t this a risk of hair tattooing? You switch one (perceived) problem for another (actual) one further down the line. 🤔

Theextraordinaryisintheordinary · 15/01/2025 22:44

I’d worry about them
fading and bleeding out. My sister had her eyebrows tattooed and they looked great for 12 months but not so much now which is really sad. Waste of money.

bluebee17 · 15/01/2025 22:45

Not really sure what it's got to do with you, he a grown man isn't he and it his body

Eenameenadeeka · 16/01/2025 01:32

It's his body. Do you request his permission before your hair appointments?

ThatEllie · 16/01/2025 03:51

Theextraordinaryisintheordinary · 15/01/2025 22:44

I’d worry about them
fading and bleeding out. My sister had her eyebrows tattooed and they looked great for 12 months but not so much now which is really sad. Waste of money.

Aren’t eyebrows supposed to be done every year? Back when I looked into it the place did the initial session, a touchup 6 months later, and then touchups every 10-12 months after that. Apparently it fades and discolours rapidly because of all of the face washing/makeup remover/etc and requires regular maintenance.

CatsndtheBear · 16/01/2025 04:59

This isn't the same as botox really... But I suppose he can attempt to get it removed if it looks bad.

I don't believe in Partners having to ask permission to do things to their own body, but I do think a discussion and letting the other know is polite.

I can say, I have never ever seen scalp hair tattoos look okay. They look absolutely bizarre, especially in the sun.

I would be really hesitant if my DH said he was doing it and would try to encourage him not to.

CatsndtheBear · 16/01/2025 05:01

RomComPhooey · 15/01/2025 22:43

I plucked my first grey eyebrow hair recently. I said to DH that it must look strange if you’ve had eyebrow tattooing and then your colouring changes with age. Isn’t this a risk of hair tattooing? You switch one (perceived) problem for another (actual) one further down the line. 🤔

Most people just dye their eyebrows. It takes about 15 mins a month. My 70 year old mum has had microblading and her hair is now a gorgeous silver. She dyes her brows to match the microblading and it looks super elegant.

bloodyhellthishurta · 16/01/2025 05:48

I'm confused.

He has mentioned it ... today!

MJconfessions · 16/01/2025 05:52

I didn’t even know this was a thing! Fair enough if he feels more confident afterwards.

ThejoyofNC · 16/01/2025 06:21

Am I right in thinking he wants to get hair tattooed onto his bald head? I couldn't even look at him after that tbh.

Wildwalksinjanuary · 16/01/2025 06:23

I would hate this, and find it deeply unattractive which would definitely impact the relationship if you feel the same.

I do think conversations are needed, I have never agreed with MN on this - as it iI might be a dealbreaker for some and surely all communication is good.

No you can’t stop him, of course, but you are entitled to leave a relationship if you no longer find him attractive and get the ick. I find it immature when married couples say silly things like my head, my choice.

In the real world couples discuss big decisions. Or at least they should!

MartinCrieffsLemon · 16/01/2025 10:11

Wildwalksinjanuary · 16/01/2025 06:23

I would hate this, and find it deeply unattractive which would definitely impact the relationship if you feel the same.

I do think conversations are needed, I have never agreed with MN on this - as it iI might be a dealbreaker for some and surely all communication is good.

No you can’t stop him, of course, but you are entitled to leave a relationship if you no longer find him attractive and get the ick. I find it immature when married couples say silly things like my head, my choice.

In the real world couples discuss big decisions. Or at least they should!

Big decisions regarding the house etc

Not their bodies! It is their choice. And if you would be shallow enough to leave a partner over a choice they made to their body for their ownn aesthetic then I'd suggest the relationship wasn't that strong to begin with

Glockenspock · 16/01/2025 11:58

It might fool the eye in a dimly lit room but I'd imagine it would look ridiculous on closer inspection in broad daylight.

I should have looked it up before knocking it like an ignoramus. I imagined a longer haircut 🤤 but no! Fair play to the lads on this one.

DH has booked and paid a deposit for a hair tattoo without telling me
Oreyt · 16/01/2025 12:13

People slagging it off obviously don't know what they're talking about.

If done professionally you can't tell the difference.

Zippedydodah · 16/01/2025 12:37

So it looks like he has blackheads all over his scalp?
🤢

Thirstysue · 20/01/2025 18:31

To what point do you consult him when you have your tox, hun?

CatamaranViper · 20/01/2025 18:48

I'm a huge lover of tattoos and a firm believer in having full autonomy of your own body, but I'd be quite surprised if DH booked something like this without a discussion first.

Has there ever been talk of him disliking/being insecure about being bald? If not, it seems like a very odd decision. If so, not so much.

Surely most men who get this are in the process of going bald and doing it to hide the fact, if your DH has always been bald it's going to be incredibly obvious to everyone he knows.

As patronising as it sounds, id be trying to find out what made him make this (seemingly out of the blue) decision.

Kazzybingbong · 20/01/2025 18:56

Honestly, they’re really good. My husband has one. It’s hundreds of tiny dots and it looks so much better than before he had it. Like he’s chosen to shave instead of gone bald 🤣

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