Help! No childcare...

[Nochildcare]

First time posting!

I really need some suggestions with what people do for childcare over the school holidays.

Half my childcare plans for the school holidays has fell through. There's no after school service and I work 8-6 three days a week.

I'm at a loss I don't know what to do for childcare. My dm will take my dc half the school holidays. My holidays only cover 3 weeks and I've already used them for school holidays.

I can't go term time in work or work from home. Holiday clubs are £££ a week! And pay childcare for younger dc so I can't afford it.

Anyone have suggestions?

Tia x

Also in Scotland and I’d defer a Feb child. Especially early Feb birthday.

I hope recovery goes well for your father!

Scotland doesn't do Reception. All children start in P1. Will be at least 4.5 years old.

85% is a lot to be able to claim back. More than most. Suck it up and pay for the clubs or take unpaid parental leave.

Yes people seem to struggle to understand that not everyone lives in England. Both my kids are summer born so I didn't need to think of deferring but both have February born kids who were deferred in their class.

Well cut your cloth and struggle! We’ve all
had to do it!

I don’t agree with deferrals
I’m in Scotland
My experience is the bigger older children that have been held back cause issues , particularly boys , they are bigger physically and it’s not fair.

I think a lot of people have missed this, but this is really the problem. If he’s barely making any money then it is little better than a hobby job. He has children so he doesn’t have the luxury of doing that.

Are you the breadwinner? Or would you be if you were full-time? Either he gets a proper job that actually pays or you go full time and he does the childcare/school run/whatever. You can’t be financially drowning and desperately searching for childcare while he buries his head in the sand with a self-employed gig that barely pays.

I was wondering why your OP sounded like you were a single parent.

My DD is an end of January birthday, started school at 4 1/2 one of the youngest in her year. Academically very able was fine all throughout school until university, the course she wanted to do involved moving away, she didn’t feel ready at 17 1/2 so she chose to leave school end of 5th year and do a HNC first at a local college. I much preferred her moving out as an 18 year old adult.

As a teacher I see it all the time, children who could have really benefitted from another year in nursery?, they are at school for years let them play for another year.

i totally understand that @Nochildcare !
what I found helped was to take it slow and start early doing little bits every day.
i used to start with a making a calendar or schedule layout that worked for me visually. . Then block in public holidays and time you were planning to take off and maybe any key summer camps (I didn’t use these until DC in year 2) Then gradually chip away at remainder of days.
Send out a few messages to family who you think would do a few days and offer them as much flexibility as possible in choosing what works for them and pencil them in.
Ask a couple of school mums if they would be up for looking after your DC if you look after theirs for a few days. (I had this arrangement with a SAHM and looked after hers at weekends which she really appreciated).
Then maybe look for a nanny: au pair student for summer help - I always used Gumtree or an agency. You may not want to do this - but I found it brilliant and had same person from 5yo until 11 years old!
i used to try and work a 4 day week in some of the holidays.
i used to work on the schedule every day from March just doing a few things a day and usually by July I had filled up the summer and anything that I couldn’t think of I would take unpaid leave!
Hope it all works out … it does get easier…!! X

I didn’t say as much as he wants, but in most SE jobs you can take more than the tiny amount this guy is taking?

I used to be SE for many years and one of the things I liked was not being tied in to set amounts of holiday

I think it’s very obvious I’m not saying that!

What?!

I work three mornings a week (Tues-Thurs) and get 22 days, on average, depending on when the bank holidays fall (as I don’t work Mondays or Fridays I get BH allowance).

Do you work Mondays? You sometimes lose days for this because of the way BH allowance works.

If DH is self employed why can’t he work Saturday and Sundays in the holidays and therefore have his weekend during the week with the children.

that would leave one day per week to cover.

Well obviously the comment about Freshers week was a joke 🙄 as I didn’t base my decision on deferral for that reason alone. My son was born over 3 weeks early and had he born when he was due there would have been no need to defer. He’s the end of February so someone born a few days after him wouldn’t be starting school until the following year.

I didn’t want him to struggle through his school years academically trying to catch up with the older kids in his class and wanted to give him the best start. It is very common in Scotland to defer and as we get the funding to do that to me it was a no brainer.

In Scotland a February baby will be the youngest in the year.

4.5 will make him the youngest in the year.

Holiday clubs are all very well and good but one of my kids is autistic and can't cope. I spend all my time getting her regulated for school as it is - putting her in a strange environment with strange people would be a bit much.

when dc were little we sometimes had to tag-team for childcare.
one of us started work at silly o'clock with a changeover at lunch time.
important thing is that both parents pull their weight.

You have my sympathies, but this is not the issue OP has.

@BlanketLanyard one of my DC is September born and was deferred. He is P4 now and I have no regrets. His speech was delayed and having extra time in nursery was a blessing.

Thank goodness for living in Scotland!

My DS that is September born is built absolutely solid and plays rugby but he does need loads of extra support (OT assessments are currently in motion re: provisional diagnosis of dyspraxia).

Don't let physical attributes of other children be your guide as to which child is deserving of a deferral!

I meant book the 4yp in to your work just on your summer working days, and keep his term time arrangements as is, not a permanent move.

My sister and I went to a primary school with only 6 classes, and most girls repeated a year at some point, but if you didn't, the school spat you out aged 10 and you went to secondary then. Sister and I both started secondary aged 10 (me 10 & 5 months, sister 10 & 3 months). Sister actually turned 17 just after finishing her A levels. This was in England. It caused absolutely no difficulty during school/puberty/etc but did mean a year's delay in going to university - unis in England aren't keen on under 18s.

You do know that not all big kids are thugs right?

Was it somehow surprising to you that you'd have to look after your own children?