To ask if this is normal …

[stopthewater]

Two kids, aged 4 and one and a half.

My younger one wants everything the older one has and screams until she gets it but then doesn’t want it at all.

sigh.

When apart they are delightful but the squabbles are something else and exhausting.

until she gets it

The crux of your problem in 4 words.

Very normal

Normal.

I’d say it’s pretty normal but you shouldn’t let her get her way by screaming. She needs to learn that does not work. A firm no and try and distract her with something else.

Sounds pretty normal to me but you need to stop indulging her throwing a tantrum

She doesn’t always get her way but she will literally cry and kick off until DS gets bored of the toy anyway. Hard to deal with.

What @FrannyScraps said.

Very normal for little one to want whatever older child has, what you as a parent have to consider is how you respond to that, and if you want to teach the little one that screaming gets them their way.

Remove her from the situation and take her away from him so her tantrum doesn't upset him

She needs to learn to play nicely and share toys. You can play with them both and show them how it's done.

My youngest used to try this, if older child finished with the toy it was put away until the younger calmed down, stopped stropping and asked for it nicely.

yes thats normal.

Completely normal.