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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think i shouldnt have to babysit my next door neighbours babtsitters

26 replies

motherofgood · 05/05/2008 01:29

My neighbour leaves her 3 kids with a local yob whos 14 and he brings all his friends down outside my house, we live in a cul de sac so im her only neighbour really, but im sick of footballs, swearing, gobbing and rubbish and noise really late at night.
I have called into her before about it and she just said "ive told ###(14 yr old yob) if he doesnt want me to go out i wont!! wtf??
its quite a rough estate and shes pretty rough but we get on ok most of the time but this is pissing me off, she says i should ring her if it gets out of hand - i know they will break my windows if i lose them their cushy babysitting job, isnt it up to her to make sure they dont get out of hand?

OP posts:
egypt · 05/05/2008 07:36

gosh, how old are the children he's looking after?

cluckyagain · 05/05/2008 07:40

I thought the minimum age for legal babysitting was 15?

SmugColditz · 05/05/2008 07:49

No, it's 14.

Freckle · 05/05/2008 08:15

Perhaps you should tell your neighbour to inform her b/sitter that, unless he and his mates are more reasonable, the police will be called.

If he's meant to be b/sitting, where are the children when he's outside with his mates?

Iamthedoctor · 05/05/2008 10:03

YANBU

Colditz - am very confused. I was made to understand that it isn't illegal to leave kids on their own in a house? So how is 14 the legal age for babysitting? Surely there wouldn't be a legal age?

Saturn74 · 05/05/2008 10:06

Could you arrange to babysit her children, then she can return the favour for you?

That way, the need for noisy teenage babysitters is removed.

billybass · 05/05/2008 10:07

I don't think there is a legal age. The babysitter just has to be competent.Are they very noisy? Do you have a play area, could they all go there?

SmugColditz · 05/05/2008 10:08

It's not illegal to leave children on their own in a house, it is illegal to leave children in loco parentis for other children.

You can leave your 12 year old and go shopping for 2 hours. You cannot leave your 12 year old and a 3 year old and go shopping for 2 hours, as that is leaving a child with another child who is incapable of being responsible for himself during that time, thereby forcing the older child into a position of responsibility for the younger one.

Iamthedoctor · 05/05/2008 10:09

Humpreys suggestion is great!

CrushWithEyeliner · 05/05/2008 10:09

how can the children sleep if they are so noisy?

Poor things - sounds like an awful situation all round

SmugColditz · 05/05/2008 10:11

I don't think humphreys suggestion is so good, to be honest, if she leaves her children with the local yob and his mates to hang around outside, she's probably not going to look after yours very well.

Iamthedoctor · 05/05/2008 10:11

Cold - ok, so you can leave a 2 year old (or, I am VERY loathed to say it, but I must!), so he can be responsable for himself, but can't leave a 13 year old watching him?

I see.

Sorry to bang on about it - just a subject that I am fascinated with!

SmugColditz · 05/05/2008 10:13

No, you cannot leave a child in a situation which is likely to cause mental or physical or emotional harm. And leaving a 2 year old anywhere on their own is likely to do that - even if they are asleep, if they woke up, and something happened, they wouldn't know what to do, so they would come to harm.

Iamthedoctor · 05/05/2008 10:15

But it's not 'illegal?'.

Sorry, i'll drop it now! (and write to the Government!).

youngbutnotdumb · 05/05/2008 10:27

My mum actually contacted the police to find out about a situation like this as a friend of hers was leaving her son home alone when she went to work, he was 11. The police said there isn't a legal age to leave a child as long as they are deemed responsible enough to look after themselves BUT he couldn't be left in charge of anyone under the age of 8 apparently as they cannot be expected to look afetr themself and another minor. Confused me 2 as I thought there was no legal age? Seems they are contradicting themselves TBH.

Iamthedoctor · 05/05/2008 10:28

8?!!! GOOD LORD.

SmugColditz · 05/05/2008 10:31

It is illegal then, to leave a child under 8.

And do remember, 8 year olds vary. Next door's 8 year old still plays with pushchairs and dollies, although she is so tall she has to use an adult sized one, and her mother has to be VERY careful about the clothes she allows her daughter to wear because she has no sense of 'propriety'.

The 8 year old a few streets down - I'd trust him to run a house for a week! I would do it, I don't think he should do it, but he could.

billybass · 05/05/2008 10:34

My Ds1 could run my house.Probably do a better job than me!

Freckle · 05/05/2008 11:01

There is no legal age at which you can leave a child or indeed an age at which you can't leave a child. It's all to do with risk assessment and potential consequences.

If you left an 8 year old for 2 hours and nothing happened, fine. If you left a 12yo alone and something happened, you could be deemed negligent. Equally you could leave the same 8yo alone for 5 hours every day and would not be found negligent, but, if something happened on one of those days, you might well be.

I think it's right that there isn't a specific age as it forces parents to do a risk assessment and not just leave a child alone simply because the law says you can.

cupsoftea · 05/05/2008 11:05

hopefully he'll get fed up of babysitting soon - it's a difficult situation.

also terrible that we can't say anything because yobs will cause damage.

egypt · 05/05/2008 13:40

so hold old are her kids?

egypt · 05/05/2008 13:41

sorry how old?!

Original poster
motherofgood · 06/05/2008 22:32

sorry I took so long to reply
The kids are 10, 8 and 4, the reason I got so annoyed and posted the other night is because the 4 year old rang my doorbell at 10.30 and asked me to mind him as his "babysitter" was playing football
The 8 year old then used my mobile to ring his mum and ask when she would be home, they went in soon after so I have no idea when she got back
I know social services have been involved in the last few months so i had hoped things would get better - but it seems to be getting worse

OP posts:
HelloThere07 · 11/11/2022 15:39

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

mamabear715 · 11/11/2022 15:42

I'd be temped to anonymously tell SS what's going on..