Let’s do family holidays while we still can?

[Letlooseonthedanse]

DP isn’t keen for family holidays this year. Travels for work. Wants to spend money on more house stuff, DIY etc

I’m FT work WFH and when the kids are off the burden of looking after or organising them falls to me. It’s can get very samey. They’re better when we’re away. Anyone there’s a lot of banging around getting in my way! They’re too old for most holiday camps.

Kids are 15 and 13 and I just think we realistically only have a few years left of them wanting to go away just the 4 of us. I’m not talking about extravagant spends - we’d be happy with a week in a Eurocamp. We just always have a lovely time away together.

Nothing in the house ‘needs’ fixing/doing. We have a large income so £ not an issue.

YANBU - you’re right, when the eldest is 17/18 they’ll be off doing their own thing.

YABU - Time to get that new washer and curtains instead.!

Don’t replace white good which aren’t broken!

Get a holiday booked. DH and go with you or not.

Depends what you mean by "house stuff".

After Covid and wfh, we realised our house wasn't big enough for 2 adults and 2 teens and ended up building an extension so that everyone had space to work/study and the teens had somewhere to bring their friends. This means the DC spend more time around the house rather than being perpetually out, so we see more of them day to day, and that we can still accommodate them now they are young adults no sign of them ever moving out

The trouble with holidaying with teens is that they tend to cost more than you want them too. Gone are the days of them being happy with bucket and spade on the beach :)

(But I do agree to go on holiday while you can. Just offering a different perspective).

This!

Go with them on your own if he won’t come.

Im a single parent and holidays with just my two kids (currently 16 and 10) have been brilliant for the last few years - 16 yo is getting to the age where she doesn’t want to come on a family holiday for the sake of it, so the time when they want to do it really does go quickly!

Covid took several holidaying years away too.

The three of you can go on holiday if he wants to stay home. Also don’t bank on the DC not wanting to go with you in the future. Mine are mid 20’s and despite having a few years off while they were at uni they are very much back into family holidays if it’s to somewhere good.

No one knows whats around the corner in terms of health wealth or anything else we had a last family holiday booked for summer 2020 but then covid struck and we never got the final last two family holidays abroad. Go and create memories.

Yes exactly!

Always go for experiences rather than stuff in my view. Memories of holidays last forever.

I think this is the key bit - if it’s to somewhere good!

The thing that ends at about 16 ish is wanting to go away just anywhere with you - or having to go even if they’re not that fussed!

I can understand him wanting some time at home if he’s away a lot. It’s the same feeling as you wanting to go away because you’re always at home.

I would book something and let him decide whether he wants to come closer to the time.

I have 17 and 15 year olds and we are planning a 2.5-3 week holiday this summer. A celebration for us all after getting through GCSE and A-level. So I def say holiday. If you want your teens to be more engaged with the holiday ask them to look into where or what they'd like to do.
Although I think of he wants to stay home and crack in with DIY let him. He'll soon get fomo!

Go on the holidays. Ds was 15 when Covid hit, so was 18 by the time everything had settled and you could go away properly. By then he wanted to go with his mates and off he went. And I feel cheated for those holidays we missed. So do it, don’t have regrets.

You go travelling with them, if DH doesn't want to go then go alone with them. If money is no object you could also look into one of those package holidays where you have a two week bus tour through Asia or South America. They'll never forget it and there might be other teens on the bus to talk yo.

Honestly, as a young woman, I'd say that it's better to go away when your kids are older.

I'm in my mid-20s and I prefer going away with them now than when we were teenagers. Granted, I make a contribution to the trips, but it's a different kind of fun.

I'm in my mid-20s and I prefer going away with them now than when we were teenagers. Granted, I make a contribution to the trips, but it's a different kind of fun.

That is what my DC say, they really enjoy all the planning and research now.

I feel like we can do more.

My parents still enjoy their beach holidays, which they go on without us. But we have shared interests now. We're going to Rome, and instead of it being a drag for me and my brother, we're planning all sorts of activities that all four of us will enjoy. It's nice to have more grown up fun.

My DD25 and DS20 came on holiday with us last year, first time we'd been away as a 4 since 2018! It was very different from teen years (in a good way!) - they were both completely engaged in planning activities/choosing restaurants, it was great. Cost a fortune but I don't care, we had a blast and it will probably be our last as a 4, as DD is now engaged 😊. Don't miss the chance for holidays as your children get older, they really do remember those much more than a fancier fridge!

Definitely holiday. Although I must say I wouldn’t be too sure about them not coming with you when 17. Mine are roughly a decade older and we still do a family holiday.

Definitely a holiday!

Although if you were extending the house or doing something huge that would really make an impact on your day to day life that would be different, but still camping to get out of the house would still be fun! (If you’re campers!)

My DD (age 18) has made it clear she’s always available to travel with me! I clarified that it was because I was paying 😖

This , I took my two 11 and 13 alone last year for similar reasons just wanted to get something fun in before DD turned 13 and DS had only just started secondary. Just felt like a cusp moment in time, I'm glad I did!

100% use some for a holiday

My mental health would not be the same without a break - I also wfh full time so a change of scenery is important and we always do a few short breaks as well as main family holiday

Mine are 16 & 18, 18 yo went away with friends last year but came with us too (like a pp, I think as long as we are paying they will come!)

Past few years though we did some big memory making holidays and I don't regret a penny or a minute

Go on the holiday. All i’ve had this year so far is bad news. Life is short, who cares about the things he wants to do instead. Holidays and precious time spent together is what is important.

And the good news is … DS was stomping around being a moody teenager and being really unpleasant….
After that was dealt with and kids were in bed, I brought up holidays and DW was all OMG let’s do it, they’re changing so fast and we won’t have many more summers when we can do stuff just the 4 of us

In short, DS being as arse has made DW realise how fast they’re growing up! Who would have thought a teenage temper tantrum could have made a parent want to spend more time with teenagers 😅

Is it the cost? If so, sit down and work the budget out?

or is it the travel ? Does not not like flying, the fuss if of it all etc? If so, maybe even consider not going so far. Maybe even just to Jersey for a break.