Don't post videos online if you don't want feedback

[Ljcrow]

I don't understand the logic behind posting videos online, e.g. on TikTok, then getting offended when people comment with judgements. In particular I'm thinking of the videos about "controversial parenting techniques" (often they're not that controversial) which are then inevitably followed by a raft of critical comments plus comments criticising the critical ones for being judgemental. The original user will inevitably then say something like "if you don't like it, just scroll on". I would hate to put my family life out there completely openly, real identities on show, to have other people comment their judgements, so I just wouldn't do it! In my opinion, if you're happy to post all that online, you can't then get offended or annoyed if you get negative feedback.
AIBU or if you don't want the opinions of strangers should you just not post videos like these in the first place?

The original user will inevitably then say something like "if you don't like it, just scroll on".

I don't think this means the person is necessarily offended though? It's a valid point - i see stuff online all the time that makes me cringe but I do just scroll past it whilst cringing internally. So it's an option for anyone else to do the same.

That said, I do agree that if you're going to post thing publicly online you are inviting feedback, but equally - the person giving the feedback is then inviting feedback on their feedback 😂 And so the cycle goes on. So it works both ways imo.

Disagree. YABU.

We don't expect to be criticised by strangers in the street who don't like what we're wearing/doing/saying (unless illegal of course) we would expect them to just walk on by. It's considered very rude to even eye roll or huff, let alone for someone to say something.

Same online. People talk of how people "put themselves out there" online but you're also "putting yourself out there" every time you go to a public place. I don't understand how there is a difference. Scroll on by, just as you'd walk on by.

So you could equally say, "don't comment on someone's social media posts if you don't want feedback on your comment" 🤷‍♀️ It's cyclical isn't it.

@Agix
Yes, agreed, and your analogy helps to make my point. I wouldn't post anything online as a comment that I wouldn’t openly say to their face in a room, for example. And there are many, many times I bite my tongue in the real world. I do the same online, otherwise if I choose to comment., I'm fully aware that I'm inviting judgement and feedback on my comment in the same way the OP of the original social media post is.

I suppose the difference is that with these "controversial parenting techniques " videos on TikTok that I'm mainly thinking about, the whole premise is that you're acknowledging that others will disagree, so you're surely inviting critical comment to an extent aren't you? You can't then act surprised or offended if you get what you've asked for, surely.
People walking past me in the street don't get an insight into the workings of my private family life the way these people who post online allow others to get an insight into theirs. It's not the same.

Also, if I see someone doing something I find really unacceptable (e.g. smacking a child or smoking into their baby's pram) I will sometimes eye roll or say something. Yes, I'm aware people will find that rude.

I see the ones that are about fashion or make up and the poster will say "let me know what you think in the comments". Then they complain when they get critical or negative comments. So I think what they actually mean is, "please lick my arse and tell me how amazing and gorgeous I am"