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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to not move house during GCSE’s (y1)

2 replies

superfragilisticwineistasty · 11/01/2025 01:03

Hi mums. Hope you can help me a bit as I am in two minds on this. We moved to an area about 8 years ago at the start of the redevelopment of it thinking it would improve as time went on. That’s not been the case though so we decided that once DD is done with GCSE’s and off to college next year (none local to us and her school doesn’t have a sixth form) we’d move somewhere where we could have more of a community, walking distance to a nice high street etc and with a college near by for DD1. Also places she could get a weekend job etc.

We like new builds so have been scouting locations with the idea to put our house on the market towards the end of this year and to move in Summer 2026 (after DD has finished GCSE’s)

Problem is that during our scouting we’ve found a perfect house is an amazing location but it’s ready THIS summer! It’s only 25 min (drive) from where we currently live and a 2 train stops. My husband is retired so would do the school run and can help DD with seeing friends and they are of course still welcome at ours etc BIT I just don’t feel it’s fair to take DD away from her friends and relative freedom (we live walkable distance to school and a couple of her friends and they will go for walks or visit each other etc) at this stage in her school career.

Hubby says I’m being too soft and we will be mad to miss out on this house. DD just wants to make everyone happy - likes the house but says she’ll miss her friends. And I’m torn between what to do.

DH is not DD’s dad btw so I can’t “share” responsibility for her unhappiness if it doesn’t work out. And DD’s dad will grumble whatever I do (ever!) so no help there.

What do you think:

YANBU - these are important formative years for DD, let her have some consistency and stick to the original plan

YABU - stop being so sensitive about it, kids deal with worse things and this is a good choice for everyone’s future.

OP posts:
NarNarGoon · 11/01/2025 01:17

Move.

It’s 25mins, accessible by public transport and DH has agreed to do school runs - it’s hardly a life changing move and it’s what’s best for the whole family, not just DD.

XiomarasHandbag · 11/01/2025 02:20

Definitely move if you (and DD) love the house. 25 mins is nothing, and being able to use public transport too is such a bonus. My kids travel more than that one way each day for school and to see their friends (secondary age) at weekends - their friends still come over to ours as well, and it has also worked out OK with joining new clubs locally for the DC to make some new friends.

It does sound like the best move for you if DD is on board, best of luck.

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