19 year old DD sleeping all day

[shonapop]

Hi, I'm looking for advice on what to do with my 19 year old. She works about 20-30 hours per week in a pub, mostly evenings. Comes home and games and chats to friends all night online. She is, for the most part, considerate about keeping the noise down. My problem is she then sleeps all day, doesn't properly see daylight, then goes and does it all again. I can see it's affecting her moods. I've made gentle recommendations and explained it could lead to depression/low mood. Any suggestions what to say? I mean, she's an adult, so do I just zip it and watch her mood drop?

She works nights/late evenings, this is what happens.

Think about your day (if you work a 9-5), you have a good 2-3 hours before work and 4-7 after work to do whatever you want, before sleep. She also needs that time, coming straight in from work and going straight to sleep isn't sustainable.

get her some Vitamin D tablets, one of the sunrise alarm clocks and see if she wants to talk about anything

I think this is pretty normal if you work in hospitality. My husband and sons do the same.

I mean, that's what happens when you work evenings.

I'm not a night owl at all, but when I finished at 11pm I couldn't sleep til 3 or 4am - some people need process time after work or their brains can't wind down. Just imagine her whole day has shifted by 8 hours, instead of getting up at 7, she gets up at 3.

Try and coax her out a bit, but ultimately she'll figure it out on her own.

Sounds pretty normal tome OP given her age and job choice

Sounds absolutely right. I did a short period of working nights in my early 20s and I would get home at 7am but wouldn't actually go to bed until early afternoon, up at 10pm for the night shift. It's not great as a long-term strategy but that's just how the body works. You don't immediately go to bed after your work day ends either. Short of changing the job, I don't see what she can do.

Shes not exactly working night shifts she could be in bed by midnight, of course she should get up, she needs to cut down on her gaming

Make sure she takes a Vitamin D supplement, it's the daylight boost vitamin, one of the few they recommend we all take.

If she works 8 hours, 4pm to midnight, she's not going to want to get straight into bed and jump out at 8am, do a whole day and then go to work. That's like expecting someone who works a 9-5 to get into bed at 6pm, wake up at 2am, do 6 hours worth of stuff, go to work and get straight into bed.

Do you not come home, eat, do something to switch off?

I had this when I lived at home.
I work full rotating shifts and my mum worked part time. She would wake me at 1pm after a night shift and also be annoyed that I was still awake (reading in my room) at 2am when I finished at midnight.
It led to some very heated arguments and I moved out.
@AvidBee gets it. I think if you work office hours or more regular hours it's hard to comprehend staying up "so late" but everyone needs time to switch off and unwind

Is that all she’s going? Pub work? While there’s nothing wrong with it - I’ve worked in them too as a student I’d be encouraging her to look for a better day job.

My brother works in a bar and some nights doesn't get home until 4am, my parents will often be horrified to see him going to bed as we all get up to start our day at 7, until I remind them that we finish our days at 7pm and have.l a good few hours to unwind!