Why do i feel like reporting was wrong

[Strawberryshortcake28]

Long story short my ex husband blackmailed me via voice note he threatened to post sex tapes and indecent images of myself online if I took him for child support

I contacted the police for advice they listened to the voice notes and as they were so abusive they had to arrest him as a safe guarding measure and sieze his devices.

Why do I feel so bad I just want him to move on and be happy I can take abuse but I can't have that threat over my head. He's never been in trouble before I'm scared for him I'm afraid of what it will do to his mental health or if social services get involved I don't want him to stop contact with our child but will be difficult without a phone

Why on earth would you waste a single second of your life caring about his wellbeing when he just rode the shite over yours?

Stuff his mental health and find your anger! He sure as hell didn't care one damn about your mental health when he did what he did, and is still doing!

Your parents are mad to even speak to him - if you were my daughter, the fucker would be blocked!

His crying down the phone to your family is just another part of him manipulating you. He did this to himself.

Imagine what your mental health would be like after he released all your pictures.

Imagine your mental health if you'd given in to his threat, then struggled to afford your joint children.

Imagine what your mental health has been all the time he's been abusing you.

Those are the things you should worry about, because he sure as hell isn't bothered about ruining you.

What about your mental health OP?

Fuck him and the horse he came in on, and congratulations on having him out your life.

I do hope your parents gave him short shrift when he phoned them up. Jeez if someone did that to my daughter and then had to cheek to phone me up, I'd bloody call the police and get him done for harassment.

He brought this all on himself!

Social services would not stop all contact. The tactics he is trying on you to get you on his side to manipulate your feelings and to make you feel guilty or feel sorry for him. He will try in different ways to do the same on future meetings with your child but be prepared for that. Write down and date anything unacceptable the child tells you he says to manipulate or cause emotional upset and make the social workers aware. He might try for full custody or a retaliatory behaviour as he seems to have form for that.

Reprehensible bastard. I'd be devastated that my child had to spend any time at all with someone who thinks that's OK.

He deserves everything he gets. Why would you want a monster like that around your child?

Well done for reporting him op - you did absolutely the right thing.

Look at it this way - if you hadn’t reported him he’d be pulling shit like this all the time. You’ve simply said “no, that’s not happening”.

You’ve gotta love these men who go to the mattresses when they’ve lost control and think they’ll get away with continuing to abuse the mother of their children. It’s like a 6ft toddler having a tantrum on the floor and tearing at their hair.

Well done for getting away ❤️

Oh, and to answer your question - you feel like you’re wrong bc you are probably a very nice empath type - the type these men latch onto - who has been bullied and manipulated for years into thinking you are wrong to react to his abuse. You’re still letting your heart catch up with your head, but you’ll get there.

You did the right thing. He was threatening you and trying to blackmail you.
Hopefully this will be a wake up call for your ex and he will be more aware of his potential to cause and get into trouble.

So your ex husband threatened to blackmail you with indecent images of his child's mother because he didn't want to financially support his own child? That's a lot of very, very fucked up stuff in one sentence. And you're sorry in case he can't see your child?! He doesn't sound fit to be within 5 miles of your child - or any child. Dear god. Do you really want your child to be under the care and influence of anyone capable of this vile and criminal activity? I'd be worried to death in case he actually obtained access.

He'll get his devices back once they've got the evidence. He did this to himself with his awful behaviour - you didn't do it to him. It's a crime. You did the right thing. But when he sees that this attempt at manipulation and getting his way hasn't worked, he'll try another. And probably another after that. He may go to the other end of the scale and beg and cry and act vulnerable and pathetic etc. Don't be taken in.