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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I feel dreadful all the time !

16 replies

Hm1987 · 07/01/2025 02:48

Bit of a long one unfortunately i am 37 mother of 3 beautiful children Dd is at uni and i have 2ds at home one is 14 and the other is almost 3 . I work full time and generally well health wise but since April i have had extreme fatigue to the point i just want to cry i have a range of other symptoms that i just can’t figure out whats wrong with me ! I get abdo discomfort but no diarrhoea or constipation and it moves to different areas in my tummy my body aches every gland in my body comes up under my neck between my legs and under my arms i get dizzy and get brain fog and pins and needles in my hands and feet and chest pain when my glands come up and just generally feel crap i have to take paracetamol almost daily just for the aches and pains. The Gp has basically labelled me as anxious he did bloods everything came back ok apart from my folate which was low and was treated . I think it was slightly unfair he’s come to the conclusion its in my head and his reasoning is fair my Dh was diagnosed with cancer in may he had a successful surgery and treatment and is now cured ! And for the last few months i just shrugged it all off as health anxiety because my partner attended the gp a few years back just before covid hit and they fobbed him off that it was just a cyst and he believed them until it started growing so we got a second opinion and he was eventually diagnosed. But since then my gp thinks i am neurotic. As i said i could cry they are not taking me seriously and i have very real symptoms i dont know what else i can do …… has anyone else experienced this? .

OP posts:
EnjoyingTheArmoire · 07/01/2025 02:58

Have your surgery checked your b12 levels?

Sorry that you're going through this.

ThatLimeCat · 07/01/2025 03:16

Agree with B12 check. Got your vitamin d checked?

Can you see a different gp?

Edizzler25 · 07/01/2025 03:25

Similar happened to me a few years ago pre kids when in the office 5 days a week pre covid with a long drive. Had blood tests and nothing showed but looking back I think it was just exhaustion… I never used to eat enough then either and often did a lot of spinning and other gym classes after work but totally crashed and couldn’t sustain it anymore after long days in the office.

if no obvious medical reason could be your body telling you to slow down?

Mumof1andacat · 07/01/2025 03:30

The physical symptoms of anxiety are very real. It's the minds way of signalling for help.

XChrome · 07/01/2025 03:44

Are you talking about your lymph nodes being raised when you talk about glands being up? That usually means an infection. Any possibility it could be Lyme disease? Look into Lupus, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia too.

Many doctors are sexist and routinely dismiss women's health problems as being all in their heads. If your regular GP dismisses your symptoms and won't help you then you need a new one. Raised lymph nodes are not psychosomatic. Pain usually isn't either. Pain is your body's way of signalling there is something wrong.

Journeyintomelody · 07/01/2025 04:25

Definitely check B12. Symptoms are also consistent with some autoimmune conditions, might be worth an investigation if you have any of the other symptoms. Could be a million different things so don't settle for anxiety if this doesn't feel right. Ask for a second opinion.

Zanatdy · 07/01/2025 04:29

Did they check your ferritin? My 16yr old DD has a lot of health issues, exhaustion being a big one, pins and needles too, and dizziness now and then. Hers began when she needed a blood transfusion age 12 when her first period wouldn’t stop (28 days and 3 different meds to stop it). In the early days her ferritin (iron stores) was very low, but it wasn’t even tested for a couple of years, as it’s not part of the standard full blood check. Now her B12 is low, even though she had 4-5 injections in the summer. She has finally been referred somewhere to investigate. The GP we saw yesterday was great, very thorough and I am going to book in with him every time. He was honest and said something clearly going on, but he needs time to think about and discuss with colleagues.

After receiving some terrible news about one of my good friends this week I am pushing and pushing, as all her symptoms were blamed on menopause but just found out it is advanced lung cancer. Women can be fobbed off. It won’t harm to take some vitamins, I take a high dose Vit D daily, but maybe take one with iron too.

whitefluff · 07/01/2025 05:15

This reply has been withdrawn

Withdrawn at OP's request

inkblink · 07/01/2025 05:18

have you been tested for coeliac disease, thyroid disease?

jeaux90 · 07/01/2025 06:57

GP, blood tests and stool samples will be their first recommendation.

Please go OP.

PreferMyAnimals · 07/01/2025 07:18

I've had similar. Took years but I eventually got stool tests and diagnosed with a bowel condition. Before they dismiss it as anxiety, they need to explore other physical options.

ScouserInExile · 07/01/2025 07:36

It sounds like fibromyalgia to me.

876543A · 07/01/2025 07:41

You're life sounds extremely busy and probably has been for a long time given the ages of your children. Probably have all sorts of viruses coming in and out of your house. Its OK to feel exhausted without their being a specific reason for it, when you're a busy mother.

Do you exercise much? Regular exercise is the thing that makes me feel most alive and good - improves sleep and regulates all kinds of hormones in the body. Without exercise I feel shite pretty quickly, so I make sure I give myself time to do that each week. Plus eating regularly and going to bed at 9pm - even if there's washing up on the side or hoovering that needs to be done etc I leave it and go to bed - sleep is the priority!

Consider part time working?

Hm1987 · 07/01/2025 11:07

thank you so much for your responses i managed to get a Gp appointment today spoke with a different doctor he was great really reassuring has ordered some more bloods to see if i have any deficiencies and also stool sample tests and said he Will check everything to make sure i am medically ok and go from there he reassured me i am not crazy or made me feel like a nuisance. He said a number of things could be the cause but also gave me a good wake up call and said i need to stop doing things at a hundred miles an hour and listen to my body …… which i am guilty of . But i am so glad he took me seriously. I will keep you all updated.

OP posts:
Feelingleftoutagain · 07/01/2025 11:15

Have a blood test for underactive thyroid, as your symptoms matched mine before I was diagnosed

Hm1987 · 15/01/2025 11:45

update from my post saw the gp and all my tests came back normal but developed a new symptoms in the last week upper right abdominal pain the gp suspects that i have a gallstone and i am booked for a scan today. Looking at all the symptoms its sounds about right.

OP posts:
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