To be really freaked out and scared to go to sleep?

[theresabluebirdinmyheart]

This morning when I went to bring my bin in and put it away I realised the bench in my back garden had been moved. It’s a heavy wooden bench and the wind would not be able to blow it. It had been moved closer to my secure 6ft fence. I have a side gate which was still bolted shut.

the bench was where it usually is when I put the bin out last night so at some point during the night last night it had moved.

The only explanation I can come up with is that someone had climbed over my fence during the night and moved the bench to get a leg up over the fence to get back out again.

I am really really freaked out at the thought of this. I have a ring doorbell camera at the front door but no cameras at the back so haven’t got any evidence to prove anyone was there but I just can’t come up with any other plausible scenario than a prowler or potential burglar moved it to gain access over the fence.
I’ve tried to put it out my mind all day but now it’s dark and time to head to bed I’m feeling really sick and anxious. I’m a single mum with a disabled daughter and feeling really vulnerable. Every noise is creeping me out.

Can anyone think of a plausible and less terrifying scenario of how the bench could have moved? To put my mind at ease? Have ordered a camera for the back garden to be delivered tomorrow but fucking hell I feel really afraid.

TL;DR - heavy wooden garden bench moved during the night last night and am freaked out someone was prowling in my back garden and used it to climb over the fence.

It does seem like someone has had a nosy around but it could have been kids fetching a ball they’d kicked in or a homeless person looking for a safe place to lay their head for the night.

Can you organise a camera for the back to make you feel safer? And double check doors and windows. Hopefully all will be fine but your concern isn’t silly. They’ve gone now if they were there.

Woah. It could easily be the wind. I have a tiny enclosed courtyard out back and just about everything has been moved all over the place.

Including a very heavy bench that takes 2 strong people to move.

Be reassured, you haven't been burgled.

That does sound unnerving, but hopefully just a one off, maybe someone messing about? Sounds like a good thing you’re getting a camera, do you have neighbours nearby? Might be worth a chat if you think someone might have gone over into their garden too?

I don’t think it would have been kids as the gardens either side of mine has young kids and they wouldn’t be out at that time, a homeless person still freaks me out as I’ve had an incident with a drug addict injecting at my front door before trying my door handle which was caught on camera! I live in a bit of a sketchy area, it’s an estate where the only people out in the dead of night are up to no good.
I’ve ordered a camera to be delivered tomorrow to set up at the back, I’m just so unsettled,

Kid getting a lost football.
Pet owner thinking their lost cat was there.
Wrong address (pissed teenager coming back to mates house but realised it was a different one... maybe theyd missed the last bus, forgot house keys, didnt want to wake mates parents up by ringing front doorbell).

IF it was someone up to no good (and I doubt it), then last night they realised it wasn't worth doing anything - breaking in, or playing a dumb prank or whatever. You know that because your own theory says they left last night without doing anything except moving the bench to help them climb back out.

It wasn’t the wind, my son’s slide is plastic and hadn’t moved, it hasn’t been that windy here. The bench had been moved, not blown over.
I know I haven’t been burgled I checked the shed etc, but it’s quite well known people scope out a house beforehand.

I’d leave a downstairs light on and probably wouldn’t get that much sleep.
Is there any damage or anything missing?

Don’t blame you for freaking out but if someone was in your garden last night they presumably would’ve tried your back door then. As long as you’re all bolted and locked I’m sure you’ll be fine.
On our Nextdoor app people often share cctv of those opportunistic youths trying doors etc, they don’t actually break in, they just hope someone’s left a door unlocked.
Good idea about leaving a light on, maybe even leave the tv on or radio just in case?

Leave a speaker downstairs with a long series of podcasts playing, and ideally another one with a radio station on. If you have plugs with timers, set lamps in downstairs rooms so they are on and off through the night.
Do you get on with a neighbour well enough to phone them?

i checked the shed and it’s all secure. There’s nothing out there to steal so nothing is taken. I spoke to my neighbours, one of whom has a camera and said nothing was showing up on his but he’s two doors away, he did say I could call him anytime if I feel unsafe though, like I said, it’s not a great area and it’s isolated, nobody would be passing by . I have a large secure fence you’d have to make quite an effort to get over. If it was someone looking for a ball or a cat etc I think it was pretty unreasonable to go climbing into others gardens on the dead of night, surely you’d know it would alarm whoever lives there?

Yeah I think I’ll leave all the lights on downstairs, i don’t know whether to leave the outside lights on like would it make it easier for them to see what they’re doing if they did come back?

If you feel vulnerable could you consider getting a dog in future? One of my neighbours 3 doors down has a (frankly demented and obnoxious out of control, ) poodle and I can't even walk up to my own front door (I don't even have to walk past my neighbours door at all to get to mine) without the dog yapping it's head off. But strangely it does make me feel safer by proxy, even though it's not my dog. Plus I imagine it provides company.

@TightlyLacedCorset i did actually think to myself, I wish I had a dog! I do have a cat and she was meowing like crazy at the back door the other evening (even though she’s an indoor cat) so I’m just thinking the worst of everything now. I’m hoping to move soon to a busier and more brightly lit area where I’m not so isolated.
I never thought I’d be wishing I had a dog and a male partner but here we are 😂

Deffo do this because it would show them you have noticed. Leave it on. Also depending what handle you have on your door, you could put a cup (preferably one you're not fond of) and if the handle went down, it would make a noise or smash.

Don't over think this too much.
Maybe sleep downstairs for the night till your camera comes.

A reasonable person wouldn’t climb into anyone’s garden, but a kid/teen - they won’t care.

Personally I would leave the outside light on and the downstairs. Two ways to look at it, lights are a deterrent, but yes they’ll be able to see very well. I just know I wouldn’t get any sleep and I’d like it lit up like Blackpool.
We live in a wooded area and have cctv and external lights I can switch on if spooked.
If it was a person and they were up to no good, it’s doubtful they’ll be back the following night.

I don't blame you for feeling a bit freaked out but it's good that you've alerted your neighbour and can call on him if need be! Have you got secure locks on back doors and windows? I would probably put something heavy in front of the back door so it can't be opened without you hearing it! Keep your phone by the bed and call 999 if you hear any suspicious noises! Hopefully once you've got your camera up at the back, you'll feel more reassured

We were burgled once and police said you can turn lights off but leave tv on low or mute. The flickering of the tv is more of a deterrent than just lights.

Oh op, sorry how unsettling. If it helps, a lot of mumsnetters are night owls so at least a bit of online company throughout the night if you can't sleep.

I would leave the outside lights on, a brightly lit garden is a deterrent.

I would also leave a downstairs light on but be mindful of any gaps in curtains or blinds which may allow a view into your property. Check and lock all windows and doors.

Hope you get some rest tonight OP. As another single parent I know what this sort of anxiety feels like.

Leave all the lights on downstairs. Get some very bright outdoor security lighting as soon as you can back there. And some trellis for the fence.

Sorry OP you must be feeling very vulnerable. Try and make your home as secure as possible.

I wouldn't leave the outside lights on, personally.
Don't make it easier for them to get up to mischief.
I'd take comfort in the fact that nothing's been nicked, nothing has been broken into so logically means not worth their while coming back to your place.
Sleep with your radio on - that way, you won't hear any of the "noises".

I live alone too OP.
It's not nice being spooked - you have my sympathies.

My neighbour found some random chap asleep one morning, in front on my garage door, several weeks ago.
Garage is a long way from the house (long, thin garden) and I started Googling cameras but then thought, quite honestly, I don't want to know what's going on in the wee small hours. I've enough to worry over with stuff I do know about.

Thanks everyone, it’ll be all lights on inside and out, TV on, luckily my door handles don’t move when they are locked and are heavy duty locks. I think I’ll just stay up tonight and watch TV, any movement at the front and the ring camera will alert me and I’ll keep an eye on the back every so often. if I do see anyone I’ll call my neighbour. Fucking horrible feeling to be scared in your own home, I’ve got PTSD anyway, i don’t need this!

Yes home security is key and especially as a single parent OP if you can, please look into ways to secure your home.

A camera is great but a home security specialist once told me they are not much or a deterrent these days. I have instead a folding security gate on my back door.

It’s worse with the dark mornings, I hope you manage to get some rest.

OP, I'm sorry you're feeling scared. Bastards pissing about in YOUR garden.

Watch something gentle and funny on tv, bring a blanket and pillows downstairs and try to rest.