To not attend this work meeting?

[Whatdayevenisitt]

Returning to work after 6 weeks tomorrow I had a bit of a mental breakdown at work and now currently on anti-depressants. We have our monthly operational meeting on Wednesday and I haven’t seen everyone since my breakdown.

I feel abit embarrassed and feel it’s to soon to be put in that environment.

AIBU? I want to take it slow and not force myself to soon.

Can you talk to your manager about it? Are you needed at the meeting to get up to speed? Or is it one you can skip while getting up to speed?

Have you spoken to your Manager or HR about a phased return? You could build up over the new few weeks to working full time again so you would have chance to see colleagues before you see everyone at the next one of these meetings.

What has bee discussed and agreed about your return to work? Were occupational health involved? You should have had a return to work assessment where you could ask for (or they recommend) reasonable adjustments such as a phased return and lighter duties. Your line manager should be arranging/facilitating this, they have a duty of care.
I agree the meeting sounds inappropriate so soon, especially in light of the reasons for your illness.

If you feel it's too soon for that environment then send an email to manager and HR asking for support.

But please don't feel embarrassed. Having a MH breakdown isn't embarrassing. You seen a GP, got some help and started medication. It takes strength to do those things so you should be proud and I'm sure your colleagues are concerned for you and wouldn't want you to feel embarrassed.

Unless of course they are all twats and that's why you had a breakdown at work? In which case get yourself signed off more and look elsewhere!

Your first meeting back should be a return to work meeting. And maybe a phased return too. I went back after a breakdown and met my manager outside the department, and was allowed to work in another area for that first day back. If this hasn’t been arranged that’s a cause for concern.

(I ended up not returning the next day, but that’s another story.)

I’m in a similar position to you. To be fair if that meeting makes you feel anxious are you sure you are ready to go back?

I would suggest a trip to OH and a stress risk assessment is completed to support your return to work. Have you self referred for talking therapy or accessed your workplace EAP?

you shouldn’t be ashamed or embarrassed - these things happen.

one question… what has changed to make you feel it is the right time to go back? It will either have to be you or the employer. But if nothing has changed you will likely be in the same position again

Agree with PP that you should have a return to work meeting and discuss perhaps having a phased return to work over several weeks? My DH was off sick for a few months and had this and still getting support now, from OH and his manager. Please don't throw yourself in at the deep end as it won't give you the best chance of a successful return. Speak to you manager tomorrow or HR.

If you're returning tomorrow won't you see a few people then so it's not like you're straight into the meeting

No we all WFH.

Could you attend online but ask to keep your camera and mic off.