Pregnant after being in a job for 9 months

[ShakingThatPeach]

I’m 32 and desperate to get pregnant. I made a poor career move last year that’s now put me in a difficult situation.

In 2023 I thought I’d found a dream job in a dream sector but it very quickly became apparent the environment was toxic and my manager wasn’t competent. I left the role after only 9 months and landed a slightly lower paid role with less responsibility in an organisation I really love.

I really panicked last year when I realised I needed to find a new job and that I’d be ttc while new to a role and could potentially get pregnant less than 9 months into the job.

My new job has enhanced maternity has the same criteria as statutory maternity pay (for at least 26 weeks continuing into the 15th week before the expected week of childbirth) but I didn’t know this until I started.

I really like the people I work with and worry that if I do get pregnant they’ll just think I just got the job for the maternity package and was always planning to do the job for a bit and then have a baby! My ideal would have been to have been in a role at least two years before having a baby but my plans just didn’t work out that way.

If you were a colleague, manager or exec member and an employee did this, would you think badly of them? Or is this more normal than I think?

Basically: am I being unreasonable to get pregnant 9 months into a job?

You can't live your life worrying about what other people will think, especially with such a momentous decision as having a baby. They have a maternity package, you're entitled to it, that's it.

No not unreasonable but depending on the type of organisation it might affect your prospects for promotion for a period of time. Larger orgs can cope with leave because they have lots of staff and policies to deal with it however smaller orgs can really struggle and thus your workload falls on the remaining team members not making you popular.

Remember the law is on your side, so it has nothing to do with that, but you ask what others would think, this isn't the same as the legal position.

Crack on love! I got a new job at 5 months pregnant. N it was all fine ( I was made redundant from previous workplace)

Honestly OP who cares? If they think oh she did this on purpose so what? Pregnancy is protected and they would get over it by the time you went on maternity. If it’s time to TTC then crack on, I recon it’s way more normal than you think. Even if it did briefly reduce your chances of a promotion unfairly, would you really rather than perfect record over a baby?

*edit to clarify I meant who cares what they think. Just realise it could read that I was saying ‘nobody cares about your thread’ and that’s not what I meant 😅

How long do you have to be with the company to get mat leave?

regardless, its a much wanted baby, keep the baby!

hopefully, if your workplace value you, they might make an exception in your case to give you mat leave package to ensure you return??

whatever happens, you can find another job, keep your baby 👶

If it’s a decent organisation you will be fine. I started a new role within my organisation the month before I found out I was pregnant and I’ve been promoted whilst on maternity leave. These things happen. Once you have the baby you’ll be glad you didn’t wait.

Have the baby and don’t think twice about it. You are irreplaceable at home but completely one cog in a machine at work. Having a baby made me see that more than ever. Work don’t really care about employees

Well you might not get pregnant straight away. Maybe it will take 6 months or a year

and if you do fall pregnant straight away, you’ll be entitled to the maternity package per their terms and conditions, as is everyone else

She isn’t pregnant

I had a colleague who got pregnant for the 2nd time (unplanned) while on mat leave from #1. She felt obliged to come back earlier that planned from mat leave to show her face before heading off again. Everyone just chuckled. These things happen.
It wouldn't occur to me to think that someone had taken a job just for the maternity package, but then I've been fortunate to work in an industry where it seems to be standard to pay full salary for several months then a reduced rate out to around a year. It's a staff retention thing.

I really don’t think people will care. I started my old job in the January and got pregnant early June. Didn’t cause any issues. No one acted like it was weird in any way.
I think it’s pretty common to be honest. I also know quite a few people who came back from maternity leave already pregnant again or who got pregnant not long after returning.
Companies are set up to deal with people becoming pregnant. Don’t worry about it!

This and I think you are overthinking OP
Do what is right for you and you don't know how long it may take you to conceive
Best wishes with it all

And people who announced they were pregnant on their 1st day of commencing employment. It's not against the law

This all over. It's your life, not theirs. Who give a flying fuck what they think.

It's nothing to do with anyone else you are way overthinking. I employed a woman at 14 weeks (didn't know, obvs). One of my best recruits ever.

Don’t overthink it- just live your life!

I just have to have to meet the requirements for smp, so have to have worked there for at least 26 weeks before the 15th week before the expected week of childbirth. I’ve been there for around 5 months now so in any case would qualify whenever I got pregnant.

Thanks everyone! This has been really helpful and the reality check I think I needed 😂I do really need to stop overthinking this!

Honestly stop worrying. When your kids are grown up will you care?

there is a never a good time to get pregnant. Some people get pregnant immediately, some people take years and you can’t always work the timing for everything to fall into place.

I was once such person who took several years to get pregnant- it obviously had to happen when I had moved jobs a month before and I didn’t even qualify for their maternity benefits! It was, of course, a conversation I was dreading telling my work but all was absolutely fine.

one lady who joined just before me was 4 months pregnant when she started!

have the baby when you are ready- don’t worry about your work. It is far less important in the long run.

I've been in that situation where a new colleague fell pregnant shortly after joining the company I was working with.

I was delighted for her. In truth I also was a little like urgh more changes within the team - but only because our company were very slow to hire and I knew I'd end up covering her work. As a reasonable person I knew that was nothing to do with her though and it didn't make me think less of her at all. In fact I was really glad she'd just been there long enough too qualify for their maternity package.

If people think badly of you then they're not great colleagues.

YANBU. Have your babies on the timeline that works for you and don’t worry about anything else at all.

Your responsibility to your job is to do the work you were hired to do, competently and reliably. Your responsibility absolutely is not to make decisions about your family planning based on what works for your employer rather than what works for you.

Any colleague or manager who has an issue with that is wildly out of touch and you can disregard their opinion. Anyone sensible would urge you to prioritise your family, not your employer.

Honestly one of the main things I moved jobs for was maternity packages. I have been there longer though. Remember maternity is such a small period of time and presumably you’ll be there for years after. Don’t feel bad in planning well and making use of what’s on offer

Most people will be happy for you and if they are not then they are dickheads who you should ignore.

congratulations

I ended up having to tell my new employer that I was pregnant at the end of my first week, because I had an appointment the following week. I was absolutely dreading it but told myself that if they were the sort of people to make me feel bad about it, then it probably isn’t the sort of place I want to be working long term.

Everyone has been delightful to my face, although I’m sure the leadership time weren’t thrilled when I told them! Good luck!

you are massively overthinking this. Live your life! I got pregnant a few weeks into a new job (not planned) and stayed there for many years. You also have no idea how easy it will be fid your to fall pregnant. It may be years or never happen. You are massively overthinking this.