To return to teaching when I found it so stressful.

[Glitterpantsarebestinpurple]

I left teaching after 2 small children a few years ago and felt instant relief and a sense of calm . Mental health hugely improved.

All I had done was teach . So I found it hard to get a new role . My current job pays 30k . Been there 2 years . Every job I look at is a similar salary . I feel super stuck . I need more money.

My teaching salary was 39k. That is now 47k. When I looked at take home for 47k it is £900 more than I earn a month !’ That is once moreeverything has been taken out ( pension /tax)

£900 pcm is over 10k a year ! It would be massive to my family . Teaching pay is going up and my role has gone up £500 in the last two years !

Plus obviously I’d have the holidays which would be useful when my children go to
l school!

Am I crazy to go back to a carer which I found so stressful ?

The job is a lot harder than it was a few years ago.

If it was impacting your mental health so much then it probably would again, it could be more disruptive to your finances to go back in, and then come back out if you can’t manage it

As a former teacher who left before having kids and has a DC now, I would not even consider going back. At least, not until my DC is older. As a teacher I had to work every evening and for a chunk of each weekend. No matter how well I did my job, I always felt inadequate and lived in fear. I now have a job that is in some ways actually more stressful but I am able to dedicate evenings and weekends to family and personal life at least 75 percent of the time. That is life-changing for me.

On the other hand, I've managed to work my way up to a similar salary to the one I was on as a teacher (UPS-3) so that makes the choice easier.

Will the extra money be worth the cost for you? Only you can know.

One thing I wonder about is whether you would definitely get another UPS job role though. I don't think schools necessarily have to honour the fact that you used to be on this. They might use your career break as an excuse to pay less.

My DH did the same- left teaching (he needed to at the time, he was heading to a very dark place with the stress) and has now returned. He had the same concerns, but did some supply work (although apparently it's hard to come by some areas now?) to get an insight into some of the different local schools, and went for a perm job at his favourite when it came up.

He enjoys it now- sure I'm sure he'd rather a lottery win and not having to work, but he's miles away from the shell teaching had him in before. He also drew boundaries early on and is very strict on the times he does work at home.

That said, any scope in your current role to unskill or sideways step into an area with better progression? It's unlikely to be wildly different.

Well, teaching is definitely not getting any easier or less stressful. Obviously, schools vary but the pressures of behaviour, lack of mental health support for pupils, SEND processes in crisis, exam accountability for teachers are very real.

Having said that, when things are going well it’s the best thing in the world, and you’ll certainly never be bored.

I think you need to consider the impact on your family. Which will impact your family more? The extra money you have from teaching but being in a desperate mood with little extra time during the week, or less money to spend on family but a better mood and more time to spend during the week? My mood gets so bad because of how stressful teaching is that it is hugely impacting my family. It's not fair on them, and I have to change! No money is worth it for me, but it depends just how stressed you were.

I'd go back to it, can you try to get less emotionally involved? Not in a "I don't care about the kids" sort of way, but in a "I'm doing my best, if the kids are struggling with behaviour I'll do what I can and just accept I'm doing the best I can, I can't change the situation and can only do my best in the situation" kind of way.

I think a lot of jobs are stressful. If you earn a high ish salary there’s usually an element of stress that goes with it.

Some professions expect more resilience than others.

Theres also a lot of stress that goes with not feeling you’re compensated for the work you do - perhaps how you’re feeling now OP.

Teaching is well paid with a good holiday allowance. A lot of working professionals
would consider this a good deal for some stress.
Unfortunately, there is a very fast bandwagon that keeps on rolling.

I expect I’ll get flamed. I work 50hrs a week, my boss is a bully, I get 20 days holiday a year (plus BH). University educated. I’m paid well so I stick at it as I won’t earn the same elsewhere. My choice.

Are you secondary or primary? Could you go back 4 days a week? Whatever the answers are, it boils down to picking the right school with a good SLT who genuinely want to support teachers and reduce work load. They need to walk the walk, not just talk the talk. My own secondary school has been relatively good at that, although the mental health support for teachers is still a bollocksy helpline.

They won’t necessarily employ you on the same scale you left at which is something to bear in mind

If you could go back three or four days a week then it might work out well.
my friend is a primary school teacher and has gone from full time to three days - she says she actually enjoys her job now.
she spend a half day of her ‘day off’ on prep then has a whole day plus weekend completely free.

DH is a teacher, he quit a year ago but has recently gone back because his alumni school needed help - he’ll leave again soon. He only teaches now, used to be lead Prac and head of ks4. He doesn’t find the job stressful. The main reason is his alumni school is a very amazing school with well behaved children and parents who care.

Forgive me if I sound dramatic, but it's taken five years out of teaching for the nightmares to stop. I don't wake up in the night anymore seized with choking anxiety that I'm back there. I left without working my notice - literally walked out one day and never went back, and kept dreaming they would make me work another term. To me, leaving like that was preferable to following through on the suicide plan I'd worked out and leaving my children with no mother.

And I got out before Covid and the associated ongoing nightmares that has built up in schools. From what I hear, it's got so much worse than it ever was.

So personally, no money would get me back into teaching unless and until the entire educational system has had a massive overhaul. I don't think any salary is worth your mental health, having come so close to losing mine entirely.

If money and holidays are your only motivators, the job isn't worth it.

It's still stressful, more so now than it has ever been. You will be competing with people who are freshly trained and those with recent experience. I can almost guarantee that you will not be employed at the same salary you were at, to compensate for that (and because schools are broke).

It will be harder for you to readjust. If stress was an issue before, it will be again.

These days I'd only recommend teaching to those who have a very thick hide, no children or older children or at the very least a partner who can chip in, and no mental health issues.

Thanks all.

Reading these replies confirms I can’t return. I would be back to the anxiety and constant panic and long hours and fear . No holiday and money is worth that.

I am happy to work hard but teaching burnt me out and I felt constantly on edge.

I need to be happy to be a good mother .

I need to talk to a specialist and work out what carer I would like and how to get there. I am not greedy but I would love to earn £45k. If that takes me 5 /7 years I will accept that . I just hate feeling stuck with no way out or no progression. With teaching I climbed the ladder quickly ( probably as so many people leave !)

Thanks all
for your comments x

What job have you gone into? Is there room for progression? Training to lead to a higher salaried role?

I would never return to teaching. I only left last year after 15 years and the changes in schools is immense. I do however work now as a TA, so rubbish salary but the best bits of being in the classroom!

Don’t do it unless you have an exit strategy. SEN load now is unbelievable. It’s not the job it was so if you found it hard before, you’ll find it a lot harder now.

I suppose this depends on where you taught last time, and the age range. For example, if you were at a big secondary school, you might feel more confident going into a smaller primary school, with smaller and more manageable classes. Or even going into sixth form teaching- kids who have chosen the subjects instead of being forced into them and so are (theoretically at least) more engaged in the topics.

good luck!

If you’re secondary and teach a high demand subject, you can probably afford to be more choosy in terms of where you work?

It’s REALLY changed. If you found it stressful before I’d advise caution

The needs though have increased so much in primary, EHCPs have increased 3 times. Needs are in mainstream that were pre 2020 in specialist provision. This is alongside a reduction in staffing, you can have 3 EHCPs in a class plus another 3 who need one. And one extra adult. And at least one child who can’t even stay in the classroom 20% of the time. It’s unmanageable for anyone, and awful for the children forced into situations with unmet needs. It’s really sad to be confronted with daily frankly, as well as hard. I see classes on teacher 3 or 4 already.
expectations for paperwork are higher too. Progress measures are ridiculous. Complaints are constant at all levels.

It pays so much because no one wants to do it

Firstly a school might not take you. Especially if you are honest about why you left. The behaviour and workload is more than it ever was. I’ve got 8 years left and that maximum.

You could look at a pastoral role instead, TA, attendance officer, pastoral lead, safeguarding lead, exams officer. They are poorly paid and certainly no where near £30k but you would have to pay for no childcare in the holidays and your deductions would be minimal so actually you may well be better off in non-financial terms.

You'd have to put some proper thought into it if you need actual money for bills and mortgage then it's a non -starter but if the benefits of being around during the holidays and not paying ££££ for holiday club work for you then go for it.

Sixth form is also a good option.

Being on £30k isn't about no way out or no progression. Take the easy win at work and be comfortable whist the children are small. Bide your time and then when they are more independent then go for progression or a career change. Being employed at all puts you one step ahead of those mothers who are SAHM as you will have recent work experience when applying for the next level up.

What I noticed about leaving teaching is that any roles above £30k need people management skills and although you have it in bucketfuls being responsible for a class it doesn't always transfer to the adult world. So perhaps look for temporary internal assignments to a leadership role or a course in people management.