To think I should be back ‘normal’ by now?

[Newyearsreso]

Fairly lighthearted before anyone comes for me! But also, any advice?! I know I just need to eat less, really!

First DC has just turned one, so I am officially 1 year post partum, and I am still a good stone and a half heavier than I was pre pregnancy.

I was always very slim, below 9 stone my whole life pretty much. Pregnancy I didn’t really put on that much weight, I was ‘all bump’, as people say. The past year of exclusively breastfeeding and being on maternity leave has clearly just played havoc with my weight and I really want to kick my arse into gear and feel better about myself. I’m back at work next month and so I really want to start feeling more ‘me’ by then.

I feel I was told lies about bf making the weight ‘drop off’ as if anything I’ve clung on to weight because of it, I’m sure!

Anyway, has anyone else been in my position at this stage? I’m still bf my DC (but only really morning and evening/night now). Really going to make an effort to cut out snacks, make more sensible choices etc. I don’t really eat that much but hoovering up DC leftovers probably adds calories I don’t need.

I just had this idea that by a year I’d be pretty much back to my normal weight!? I’d love to hear from people who’ve been like me and lost a lot of weight as they reduced bf and went back to work…!

No, the age isn’t relevant. I’m 35 and it still dropped off way too fast while breastfeeding.

I was similar - didn’t gain much when pregnant (hello morning sickness) but then was very much a clinger not a shedder when it came to breastfeeding, even with a baby who would only nap when I was walking with her in a sling. I found once I went back to work and stopped bf (13-18 months depending on the baby) the weight fell off without me really trying. And that was at 35/37/40.

Maybe those women who lose the weight have babies who sleep? I haven't slept more than 4 hours total in one night since before baby was born.

I put on a lot of weight while pregnant because eating was the only way not to feel sick. I bf, but didn’t lose anything. When child was approaching 5 I had to accept that I couldn’t keep blaming my weight on “just having had a baby”.😁
Just had to start eating better and less and the weight gradually came off again….

We get out every day for a walk and activities, but I wouldn’t say we walk for hours or anything, probably average about 8,000 steps which is fewer than I used to do - again hoping once I’m back at work I can make sure to go for a lunchtime walk etc every little helps!

Hi OP. I had an incentive to lose the weight as I got married 7 months after having DD.

I started weight watchers two weeks post partum and personal training/aerobic classes and pilates after 6 weeks. (local leisure centre had a creche).

With DS it was slightly slower but with both DC I was back to pre baby weight in 5 months.

I put on 3/3.5 stone with each baby.

I didn't breast feed so didn't have the hunger that my friends talked about!

Oh and frankly, it was sheer will power. I didn't want to be fat, so I paid very close attention to everything I ate.

Breastfeeding didn't make my weight drop off.

I put on two stones during pregnancy. I ate a lot of biscuits to keep nausea at bay!

I didn't actively try to lose the weight, but I didn't feel like I had my body back for about two years. I also put weight on my stomach now rather than my hips.

I was fairly slim before I got pregnant, lost more weight during pregnancy due to severe HG which lasted up til halfway through the 3rd trimester. After that, because I could (finally!) eat again without throwing up, I ate EVERYTHING. I was like the very hungry caterpillar 🤣 this over eating continued until DD was about 10 months old. After that I started actively trying to lose weight through low calorie diet and 10k steps. It came off agonisingly slowly until she turned 2, after that it seemed to come off a bit quicker. Still not at the weight I want to be, but we have just had Christmas so I’m being kind to myself about it 🤣

edited to say I didn’t breastfeed, dd was formula fed from the get go

Yep, mine both slept 8hrs a night from 7 weeks.

Plus, in my day, you started giving them food at 17 weeks, so they didn't have the regression that people talk about on here. So full of baby rice and banana and Aptamil, it's no wonder they slept from 6pm till 6am at 6 months old!

I think it's not fair to blame bfing entirely. The exhaustion of having a small baby and less time also can lead to poor dietary decisions!

My weight gain was linked to sleep not bf. Once they started sleeping through (about 18m) my weight dropped - because I wasn't reaching for sugary snacks to keep me going.

I do have friends who couldn't keep the weight on while bf - very jealous!

Sadly not true. All of mine were weaned at 16/17 weeks and all had the 4 ninth regression after being amazing sleepers.

PP have made a good point there about sleep too. My DD’s never been a good sleeper, at 2.5 she still wakes multiple times a night. Being tired makes you far more likely to reach for sugary/carby foods for a quick fix. At least that’s the case with me!

@Lobstercrisps someone who is breastfeeding literally can't do that though. Going on a diet in the first few months will dry up your milk supply.

Similar situation to you OP. I did lose lots of weight initially when BF and was back in to my old clothes within a week after giving birth! But carried on feeding DS and I did put a bit of weight up. I was maybe about a stone heavier and one dress size up (size 8/10 to begin with and went to a 10/12)
Literally all I did was intermittent fasting but a very mild version of it - I only ate between the hours of 9am and 7pm most days and on 1 or 2 days between 11am and 7pm. Stopped snacking in the evening and I dropped weight pretty quickly and have kept it off since (7 years now!)
I think your body will carry an extra layer of fat to fuel milk production and when I stopped feeding I dropped a little more again. I don’t think drastic action is needed in your circumstances OP

@BabyShock879 i can only speak for my experience, a friend had her second baby the day before I had mine, she EBF and we started weight watchers together at about 6 weeks. We'd meet in the park and compare points. She got more points than me for the breastfeeding.

Also things were different 16 yrs ago. I was reading a thread about skin to skin contact yesterday, it never occurred to me to do that, the idea of a gunky baby made me feel a bit sick. No one mentioned it to me after delivering.

Baby advice changes so frequently. Mine were on booster seats without sides aged 3/4, which would be child neglect now!

But I think the OP is probably at the point where she wants to make a change and should just knuckle down to it and feel much better once the sun comes out in April and she can feel confident in her clothes.

The longer you hang onto it, the harder it is.

To be honest I had to actively diet to get the last stone off after my second DC, I hoped it’d just drop off but it stubbornly stayed there and I’d never had to diet in the past so i don’t think I was expecting to. I did weight watchers as I found that the easiest and because my weight had been baby related I found that I could eat the same afterwards without regaining. Bring back at work definitely helps with making food into a more routine and more manageable

You need to look at what you’ve changed in your habits. That will be the problem. You needed to maintain the eating and exercising from before in order to bounce back. People always think they have some right to eat what they want etc. and then their habits are ruined. The exhaustion is hard to work around in terms of exercise and snacking but you now need to work hard to get back to where you were and before you have a next one. Many women don’t do that and remain overweight forever after.

I didn't breastfeed either of mine but I'm still carrying an extra stone I gained with my first and he's 7! With my second I went back to my pre pregnancy weight in around 3 months or so without really trying. I think it varies regardless of breast feeding tbh.

I do find it harder to eat healthy when I'm completely exhausted and my second slept waaaaay better than my first so that might have helped.

Don't worry, you are soon going to have a toddler.

Your days of being able to enjoy coffee and cake without sprinting after your DC mid way through are numbered so it's good you enjoyed them 🤣

In terms of body shape, I am a similar weight to you. I found I did drop the weight quite quickly but things didn't feel like things tightened up again until around the year mark so don't panic too much.

You also have to remember your body shape has changed. I have managed a fairly flat stomach but my hips are wider and my ribcage is bigger. Out of interest I tried on an old dress and it fits fine around the waist but there's a whole triangle of skin where the zip should do up the side. I could lose a couple of pounds but I don't really have a lot of fat over my ribs and I don't think any amount of dieting will get that zip up. On the plus side, it gives you a bit more to spread over so you look slim front to back if not side to side!

OP I had the same experience - was very slender pre preg and my body just clung onto the pounds until I stopped bf-ing. I think (cod non scientific theory alert) if you’re quite lean normally perhaps your body hangs onto the extra fat to be able to make milk properly? I just stayed so..soft…until I was done.

It does fix itself eventually, don’t worry!

Nope. My 4 year old has never slept through the night, and neither has my almost 2 year old.