To worry about my husband?

backawayfatty1 · 05/01/2025 02:17

For me, it was suspected ceoliac disease. Also have ME & IBS - usually d type but more c recently which was unusual for me. Having to wait for follow up blood work then endoscopy to follow

YouTellEmBigD · 05/01/2025 04:26

Oh gosh! I know you said you're anxious, and that's perfectly understandable, and I don't want to distress you, but, with my dad, he'd been overweight more or less all his life, has several heart attacks, and been constantly nagged to lose weight.
Anyway, he lost a lot, very quickly, without trying, and the doctor just kept saying it was a good thing, and basically fobbed him off. By the time he eventually got them to listen and do tests, it was too late and he had terminal bowel cancer.
please make your dh go to the doctor and insist on tests! Don't let them for him off, stand firm, make a fuss of you have to, but get them to investigate.
They're so bloody focussed on "lose weight" they ignore the why, and what it could mean!
I'm so sorry if I'm adding to your worry, but, if they'd just bloody listened, my dad might have been treated and still be here! He was just in his 60s so not exactly old!

Happyinarcon · 05/01/2025 04:31

As a side note, chronic fatigue is associated with trauma. Get your hubby into some trauma therapy when you have time

AngelicKaty · 05/01/2025 05:09

@YouTellEmBigD I'm sure you didn't mean any harm, but I really wish you'd paid a bit more attention to OP's post before posting your anecdote:
"I need a hand hold and some positive vibes", "I am a terrible worrier and don't need help envisaging the worst" and "please tell me your stories of sudden, unexplained weight loss that turned out to be something benign or at least manageable".
@Frettingwife I'm so sorry OP that you're awake at stupid o'clock worrying about this. I don't have any personal anecdotes, but from a quick google search, there are a number of conditions that can cause sudden weight loss in men (Type 2 Diabetes and IBS being two of them) and most of them do seem to be benign or manageable e.g. coeliac disease, overactive thyroid gland, stress and side-effects of medications. I hope your worries prove to be unfounded and you and your DH can get back to enjoying life. 🤗

Nocheezesforusmeesez · 05/01/2025 05:45

FIL lost a lot of weight last year which was a real worry. Losts of tears later it turned out to be a bug he picked up on holiday. He's fine now.

I hope your DH is ok

Onlycoffee · 05/01/2025 05:52

Happyinarcon · 05/01/2025 04:31

As a side note, chronic fatigue is associated with trauma. Get your hubby into some trauma therapy when you have time

This simply isn't true.

In-depth study finds brain, immune, and metabolic abnormalities linked to debilitating chronic disease.

www.nih.gov/news-events/news-releases/depth-study-finds-brain-immune-metabolic-abnormalities-linked-debilitating-chronic-disease

tuvamoodyson · 05/01/2025 05:54

YouTellEmBigD · 05/01/2025 04:26

Oh gosh! I know you said you're anxious, and that's perfectly understandable, and I don't want to distress you, but, with my dad, he'd been overweight more or less all his life, has several heart attacks, and been constantly nagged to lose weight.
Anyway, he lost a lot, very quickly, without trying, and the doctor just kept saying it was a good thing, and basically fobbed him off. By the time he eventually got them to listen and do tests, it was too late and he had terminal bowel cancer.
please make your dh go to the doctor and insist on tests! Don't let them for him off, stand firm, make a fuss of you have to, but get them to investigate.
They're so bloody focussed on "lose weight" they ignore the why, and what it could mean!
I'm so sorry if I'm adding to your worry, but, if they'd just bloody listened, my dad might have been treated and still be here! He was just in his 60s so not exactly old!

Well, I’m sure the OP is feeling very reassured after reading that…🙈

tweddler · 05/01/2025 05:56

Not very reassuring, but might save her husband's life.

Onlycoffee · 05/01/2025 05:58

Op I understand your concerns. I've recently had a mystery illness for 4 months which included weight loss. I had a lot of tests until eventually saw a neurologist and was diagnosed with chronic continual migraines.

Has your DH been more active recently? Could it be any diabetes medication? My DM lost weight on new medication.

I know it's hard not to worry, do you have anything nice planned for today to help take your mind off things?

AngelicKaty · 05/01/2025 06:01

tweddler · 05/01/2025 05:56

Not very reassuring, but might save her husband's life.

How? OP wrote: "..... he will be straight off to the doctor to get it investigated on Monday." They're not exactly dragging their feet, are they?

tuvamoodyson · 05/01/2025 06:02

tweddler · 05/01/2025 05:56

Not very reassuring, but might save her husband's life.

And, to be fair, this is why it’s NEVER a good idea to ask for advice re medical conditions on here. There’s always someone comes along to give the worst case scenario, always stating ‘I don’t want to alarm you, but…’ and proceed to make them worry even more!

Tutorpuzzle · 05/01/2025 06:07

Yep, terrible worrier here too! And it doesn’t help that it’s not going to get light for another 6 hours…or at least that’s what it feels like.

It is a lot of weight to lose, but there could be many explanations for this.

I would suggest sitting down with him and going over in great detail what he’s been eating, doing, how he’s been feeling over the last month or so. At the very least it will be info that the gp asks for and you may find a revelation or two in there. It will also give you something to focus on until you get to the doc.

Don’t forget men generally find it easier to lose weight than women, especially if very overweight to start.

Sending all good thoughts to you. 😊

tweddler · 05/01/2025 07:30

AngelicKaty · 05/01/2025 06:01

How? OP wrote: "..... he will be straight off to the doctor to get it investigated on Monday." They're not exactly dragging their feet, are they?

Show quote history

The subject of the anecdote also went to the doctor, but was not taken sufficiently seriously until it was too late. Being aware that this is a possibility could be helpful.

Catza · 05/01/2025 10:03

Happyinarcon · 05/01/2025 04:31

As a side note, chronic fatigue is associated with trauma. Get your hubby into some trauma therapy when you have time

It can be but it often isn't at all. In many cases it is post-vital. In fact we would probably not diagnose ME/CFS if there are clear signs of active trauma as one of the diagnostic criteria is that symptoms cannot be explained by any other condition.

Mitzuko · 05/01/2025 10:18

The best positive thing to do is seeing a doctor and push to having tests done in order to investigate .

Worrying and asking for opinions can only trigger more anxiety, moreover whenever you look on the internet or ask for an opinion more often than not the worst comes out.

Call your Gp

Original poster

Frettingwife · 05/01/2025 12:28

YouTellEmBigD · 05/01/2025 04:26

Oh gosh! I know you said you're anxious, and that's perfectly understandable, and I don't want to distress you, but, with my dad, he'd been overweight more or less all his life, has several heart attacks, and been constantly nagged to lose weight.
Anyway, he lost a lot, very quickly, without trying, and the doctor just kept saying it was a good thing, and basically fobbed him off. By the time he eventually got them to listen and do tests, it was too late and he had terminal bowel cancer.
please make your dh go to the doctor and insist on tests! Don't let them for him off, stand firm, make a fuss of you have to, but get them to investigate.
They're so bloody focussed on "lose weight" they ignore the why, and what it could mean!
I'm so sorry if I'm adding to your worry, but, if they'd just bloody listened, my dad might have been treated and still be here! He was just in his 60s so not exactly old!

He is going tomorrow and is good at advocating for himself. 😊

OP posts:

Original poster

Frettingwife · 05/01/2025 12:32

AngelicKaty · 05/01/2025 05:09

@YouTellEmBigD I'm sure you didn't mean any harm, but I really wish you'd paid a bit more attention to OP's post before posting your anecdote:
"I need a hand hold and some positive vibes", "I am a terrible worrier and don't need help envisaging the worst" and "please tell me your stories of sudden, unexplained weight loss that turned out to be something benign or at least manageable".
@Frettingwife I'm so sorry OP that you're awake at stupid o'clock worrying about this. I don't have any personal anecdotes, but from a quick google search, there are a number of conditions that can cause sudden weight loss in men (Type 2 Diabetes and IBS being two of them) and most of them do seem to be benign or manageable e.g. coeliac disease, overactive thyroid gland, stress and side-effects of medications. I hope your worries prove to be unfounded and you and your DH can get back to enjoying life. 🤗

Thank you - we found the same Google results! 😊

OP posts:

Knittedfairies2 · 05/01/2025 12:39

My husband had an unexplained weight loss and had various tests to find the cause. It seems his pancreas doesn't have enough of the enzyme necessary to digest food so that he gets the nutrients from it. He has to take a couple of capsules after every meal which seems to have sorted the issue. I wish your husband well - and stop Googling because it doesn't help until there is a diagnosis and it won't help your anxiety one bit.

Original poster

Frettingwife · 05/01/2025 12:42

Finally, got to sleep about 4 am. Yes, I knew I was risking getting the exact opposite of what I asked for! Also very clear that others anecdotes have no diagnostic value! I might be a worrier but am fairly rational all the same and not feeling too bad today. Will post an update after the GP visit although I expect it will start with blood tests as the first move. We are going to insist on a same day appointment - I know he is entitled to be fast tracked.

OP posts:

AngelicKaty · 05/01/2025 12:54

@Frettingwife Great to hear you got some sleep OP and are feeling better this morning. You and your DH sound perfectly capable of advocating for him and ensuring you receive appropriate responses from the NHS. Best of luck and looking forward to hearing your update in due course. 🤗

achangeofusername · 05/01/2025 12:55

Keep us posted OP. This sounds like me a couple of years ago. Turns out it was a milk allergy causing the diahreah and constipation... and the diahreah caused the weight loss. You will need to push for the tests. They'll do blood and stool tests. If he's constipated may be worth taking something like dulcoease or fybogel to move things along.

Thelnebriati · 05/01/2025 13:09

In my case sudden weight loss turned out to be an early warning sign of a stomach ulcer, which was diagnosed with a simple blood test and treated at home with strong antibiotics.
Fingers crossed its something simple and easy to treat.

etonmessedup · 05/01/2025 17:04

It could be a thyroid issue, that can cause sudden weight gain/loss and is fairly easily treatable.

Everything crossed that you get some answers soon!

HotelDuVine · 05/01/2025 17:08

YouTellEmBigD · 05/01/2025 04:26

Oh gosh! I know you said you're anxious, and that's perfectly understandable, and I don't want to distress you, but, with my dad, he'd been overweight more or less all his life, has several heart attacks, and been constantly nagged to lose weight.
Anyway, he lost a lot, very quickly, without trying, and the doctor just kept saying it was a good thing, and basically fobbed him off. By the time he eventually got them to listen and do tests, it was too late and he had terminal bowel cancer.
please make your dh go to the doctor and insist on tests! Don't let them for him off, stand firm, make a fuss of you have to, but get them to investigate.
They're so bloody focussed on "lose weight" they ignore the why, and what it could mean!
I'm so sorry if I'm adding to your worry, but, if they'd just bloody listened, my dad might have been treated and still be here! He was just in his 60s so not exactly old!

What a thing to post. V lacking in emotional intelligence. Awful.

BrassyLocks · 05/01/2025 17:20

@YouTellEmBigD I'm sorry for your loss 💐

@Frettingwife A whole range of conditions can cause weight loss, as people's replies demonstrate. Wishing all the best for your husband's tests.