To ask PIL for money

[Nc54684]

PIL have offered to pay some money for our eldest child to do some activity camp in the summer holiday according to my DH.
His parents are v wealthy (millions) but very careful with money.
Ive booked a camp at £230 on my credit card (early bird discount) and mentioned to DH who’s told me to text them and ask for the money.
He has on off relationship with them, sometimes close sometimes falling out. I get on okay with them but also don’t really trust FIL for a number of reasons (he’s a slippery two faced fucker) but I’m nice to his face. I like MIL.

Anyway, I don’t really want to text them asking for money, I think DH should as he had the agreement with them?

AIBU

No, your husband should do it.

I agree your DH should be approaching them as it was a conversation with him and that they are his parents!

Yes I agree, it should be your husband.

This is definitely something your DH should be doing, rather than you

OF COURSE it should be their son who they spoke to offer it in the first place that texts them.

It would be literally absurd to come from you.

How is this even a question?

He thinks because I’ve booked it and put it on my credit card I should message them.

i think he’s nervous because his dad wanted to take our son to their house for the week instead (6 hours drive away) and I said I wasn’t comfortable I want him at our house for overnights this summer holidays, he’s nervous to ask them. If the PIL lived nearby and asked to have eldest child for 1 night that would be more okay.
FIL said misogynistic crap to our child eg women always moan, men are tough and strong, women need looking after and cry all the time, ignore nagging women and do what you want. Our child is 4 btw. So yeah I don’t want him spending long periods of time unsupervised with FIL.

WHY is he suggesting you ask them? That’s so weird in the circumstances.

Tbh they are a weird family. Often DH falls out with them (they are both to blame) and they all go no contact for a year or so. Then best friends again. Then no contact.

I never fall out or go no contact, I just lie low and stay civilised and normal

I would cancel and ask for a refund before approaching them myself.

Crikey you are right to keep your son far away as possible from him. Sounds awful.

Given that, I probably wouldn't have wanted his money either, but it's done now.

'Hi dad, thanks for the offer of paying for the summer activity. It's all booked and £x. Please could you transfer it to me. Thanks, Bob'

THIS
Seems sad that they are not offering money if they are wealthy and know you are struggling!

The OP hasn't said they are struggling, just that the ILs offered to pay for an activity.

I understand where you are coming from however I do want to state some of my best memories growing up were staying with my grandparents.
I would definitely make husband sort the money out though.

I'd not ask. Tell dh when your credit card is due and ask him to transfer the money in time.
It's up to him as to where he gets the money.
If PIL is an arsehole, do not be beholden to him for a couple of hundred quid.

It is up to your DH to ask. Sounds like too much drama overall.

It was always my DIL asking me, not my son ,when they needed money . They have offered, so prompt them .

My parents pay for one of my DC activities and I can't imagine a situation where my DH was the one asking for reimbursement and we have a fairly normal straightforward relationship.

TBH I always feel a bit ill comfortable when it comes to the time to tell them I've paid so they can reimburse, but they insist and I'm grateful (& DC probably wouldn't get to do it if we had to pay)

I think @HellofromJohnCraven has the right idea.

Their relationship seems so unstable I wouldn’t trust any offers made now to be stood by in the future.

Doesn’t MIL have any say in this?