I have been living with my partner for just over 4 years now. At the beginning of the relationship he was quite helpful with housework. He would see me cleaning etc and he would join in-happy life. Fast forward one year, I had to ask him for help with housework- this would result in him moaning and saying I was taking his day off away from him, that he needed to rest, not a child to be told what to do , that I have OCD etc etc . I have pointed out many times that we are both FT workers and we BOTH need to rest but his selfishness is blinding; will always find a way of turning the argument against me labelling me as a moaner and the selfish one.
Fast forward 4 years, argument after argument over this as I became less tolerant of it, he will wash the dishes after eating and change the odd bulb...will cook sometimes and wants praise each time he does it. He does not see a relationship as a partnership and I think that's where the problem starts. I can tell he is confused as to the little work he does should be seen as a BIG help, a favor he does to me whereas I think it's only 10% of the work to be done...I don't get any praise for the 90% I do day in and day out. There is an imbalance in how the roles for each person are perceived in the relationship but it is pointless as he won't acknowledged it. He mentions that the previous generation of women were " the real women" and didn't moan.
As much as I don't like to be by myself and need company in my life, this situation is taking my peace away. I find myself having sleepless nights over this as I am so annoyed at his laziness. I now leave his washing for him to do which he called me selfish for; I cook what I want, which he called selfish for; and I am cleaning less which I hate as I cannot cope with a dirty house; he would live in a zoo and wouldn't notice.
I am slowly detaching (85% I would say) from this relationship. I had more rest and was happier single....even looked younger. Anyone in similar situation? Were you happier single?