To ask if anyone has non-related cats who get on?

[Shrunkenwasps]

It just seems impossible unless they came as a bonded pair/from the same litter?
Has anyone got cats who actually like each other and play together rather than just co exist?

My existing cat followed me around everywhere, even to the toilet, and seemed to want a lot of attention despite having outdoor access, toys, cat tv and a cat tree etc.
My boyfriend also gave her plenty of attention when he came over.
I thought about getting her a companion but sadly she isn't taking it well so far. They don't fight but they don't interact either, just avoid each other. They're OK being in the same room but that's all, even though I kept them apart initially.

I feel like I've let both cats down, I give them both equal attention, treats etc.
I thought a kitten might be less threatening to her but I ended up taking in an elderly cat with health problems, because I know they're harder to rehome and I wanted to give him a chance.

No fights between them, but looking back, she didn't need a companion. I'm not intending to rehome him, he deserves to be looked after.

Just curious to know if anyone's got non-related cats who are friendly together?

In hindsight I would get two from the start. Wouldn't get a third now either for all sorts of reasons. I don't know what I would do for the surviving one if one died.

I thought about it for 18 months before getting a 2nd as I kept 'assessing' my cat to see if he was bored and lonely indeed. I do think he was. I'm hoping that once the kitten grows up and their energy levels match better and any tension will ease.

That's why you should always have a minimum of three cats.

Might be a daft question but can cats tell just by scent whether the other is male or female?

It sounds like your girl is making sure newbie knows his place, and it’s great that he’s not challenging her! Once she feels more comfortable after newbie has proved himself to be ok, I bet she’ll relax, but continue to remind him as needed that she’s the boss.

You can maybe try catnip to switch kitten mode on but I’d do this when they are more accustomed to one another.

Also give them treats at the same time, licky licks always make my cats happy and congenial towards their fellow felines.

Yes, pretty sure they can. Maybe neutering changes their scent but I guess the ability to distinguish a male from female is very important to cats, for their safely as well as working out potential mates.

Mine get on perfectly. The older one hissed at the little one when he first saw him, but within twenty minutes the kitten had won him over and they were cuddling and licking eachother. The younger one followed the older one around a lot at first.

Now they're like brothers. Protecting the fort. If one needs something, the other comes to get us to tell us. They playfight quite a bit but never ever hurt eachother. They are about one year in age difference. Both been with me from 9-10 weeks.

No, my old cat hates the young cat and it’s been 2 years now. She swiped and hisses and growls at her. Second cat arrived as a kitten and we took weeks to introduce them, did it by the book etc but the kitten was not welcomed. It’s very sad.

They're sitting on either sides of me on the sofa and my female cat is purring! Wow I didn't think that would happen

@Shrunkenwasps how long have you had the younger one now?

I've had 2 pairs of non related cats and they both got on well with the other. One pair were rehomed from the same "pack" (over crowded accommodation with many other cats) and the other two were from completely different homes and I got them months apart.

My two were 10 years apart in age. A bit of hissing at the start from my older boy, but my girl kitten won him over and they fell in love. Cuddled together all the time and he used to force washes on her constantly. He passed away last year sadly, but they are proof it can work.

Conversely though, my girl seems pretty happy as a singleton and I'll not get another now. She's more affectionate and vocal since he went and seems happy to rule the roost. I think she likes not battling him for attention now.

This is what I think is happening with my two. The older one is curious, but still not quite sure. He's still getting to know the kitten and what to expect in terms of behaviour, so he hisses when the kitten is approaching too fast too close. Occassionally, the older one initiates hide and seek, it is very sweet. And sometimes the kitten doesn't want to. It goes both ways.

They just need a lot of time. I'm giving each all the attention I can.

This was my exact experience. Got a second unrelated male cat when my first female cat was around 2 years old also. She absolutely despised him. He was so lovely a gentle and wanted nothing more than validation/affection from her but she was utterly livid with him. 7 years on and she still hates everything about him and he has to be on edge around her so much. I should have just got the original brother and sister when I was offered them but it was my first ever pet and so I wanted to start off with just one.

Sounds like my Cat2 and Cat3 to start with. Cat2 is the dominant one in the house. When Cat3 arrived, she growled every time she saw him. When she realised that he backed off every time she did, she realised he wasn't a threat, and they'd started bonding within a few days! They groom each other and play together. It's so lovely!

However, Cat1 hates both of them and we have to keep them separate! I've had Cat1 and Cat3 for nearly 3 years and Cat3 for a year, and she ain't budging!

Yay!! That’s really good progress, I think they will be pals given a bit of time.

I have two male kittens, non siblings, who get on like a house on fire. They are playful and affectionate with each other and you wouldn’t know they were not biological siblings.

It took about a month of hissing and scrapping to get there though.

I think it’s mainly luck. But you have to let them get on with it.

Well it seems I might have taken on rather more than I expected..... little girl has filled out quite rapidly around the middle this week and consulting with my friend who is a bit of an expert, we suspect she's carrying passengers....

This could be interesting on several levels🤣 but it might explain why she settled in very quickly, has been remarkably loving and has an extra healthy appetite, and why boy cat is more confused and curious than territorial. Guess I'll know for sure in 4 - 6 weeks!!! She was checked by a vet about two weeks ago and is otherwise healthy, and I've had kittens before so I'm not too phased.

I'm possibly going to be a Grandma 🤣🤣🤣

I have two non related cats and they play with each other all the time now. It took a little while though. Then I introduced a puppy which they both hated but now all of them play and interact with each other.

@Shrunkenwasps May I ask how long you waited until introducing them? Was there much hissing/growling from resident cat?

We've just don't the same and I'm keen on just getting on with it and introducing them to one another. I know the guidelines can vary and we've been told to keep them separate for 3 weeks! Our house isn't really geared up for keeping two cats separate, let alone for that long.

I hope you don't mind me asking. It seems as though your two are now in a place of mutual respect and are tolerating one another which sounds like a very positive step.

Thanks for your msg. I introduced mine right away, I know the guidelines say weeks but I live in a small 1-bed flat, really not realistic to keep them apart for weeks!
Resident female cat only hisses now if male cat is right next to her, otherwise after a couple of days she was OK sitting near him which was good. I'm hoping eventually they'll be getting on.
Male cat is trying and wants to be friends with her I think.

Good luck with yours! I'm sure it'll be fine. Are they same sex/similar ages etc?

Thank you for your response! It's encouraging to know you introduced straight away.

They are both females, resident cat almost 2 and new one is 1 so both still young.

My main concern is fights!! I just couldn't bear it if that happened. I can put up with hissing etc but I hate the thought of anything physical between them.

Did you just allow them to see each other in the same room? How did it go initially?

Apologies for all the questions and sorry to hijack your thread!

Could I suggest you find your way over to the Mumsnet Litter Tray - loads of good advice from experienced cat owns, plus plenty of social chat :)

We have three unrelated, neutered males who get on very well. They're currently 8, 4 and 1.

They curl up and sleep together, play together, share food and happily hang out when they're roaming outdoors.