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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Argh- df in hospital- dm making it all about her!

30 replies

Stressedgiraffe · 31/12/2024 17:49

Long sorry
My dm phoned me at 12 to tell me df had been taken to hospital. He had a fall and has a utility. Ambulance called at 12am.
She hadn't gone with him but would go later once my aunt and uncle came round and would take her (she doesn't drive)
I immediately got the bus to the hospital ( I medically can't drive). I stayed with him in a&e until he got taken to a ward then came home at 5.
We were waiting for dm to arrive and see him.
We called a couple of times to tell her what was happening
All she did was complain she had been up all night worrying.

They are keeping him in till thu/Fri
We asked when she was coming but she'd gone for a bath.
We had asked her to bring in a phone charger where it was etc but she claimed it was too complicated
I got dh to bring one in (disabled so by bus)
I've called to let her know what ward and told her how he was.
She complained that she now doesn't know how she's going to get to her nye party as df would have driven. She won't be going to the hospital tomorrow as it'll be to difficult to see him In a hospital bed.
Arghh

OP posts:
Wonderi · 31/12/2024 19:20

Unless she’s got form for attention seeking (my mum would be in here wailing as loud as she could)

I would assume that it’s actually her panicking and not wanting to face up to it.

No one wants to think about their loved one being weak or dying one day and if you’ve never thought about it before, it can hit you when they get poorly.

There’s no excuse though and I would tell her she’s being selfish and that it’s not about her right now.

EdgeofSeventy · 31/12/2024 19:38

My mums husband rarely accompanied her in any ambulance admission (there were a lot but not the point) and when he did visit it was for an hour or so. He often fell asleep.
It pissed mum off really.
How old are they @Stressedgiraffe ?

Stressedgiraffe · 31/12/2024 19:44

Update: shes gone out to her party. A friend came and picked her up! Ffs

They are 77/78.

OP posts:
Wonderi · 31/12/2024 19:52

🙄🙄

It’s bad enough to not visit your DH in hospital but to then go out to a party takes the piss!

I bet she’d expect him to visit her in hospital.

Luckily he’s got you.
I’m sure you’d rather be doing anything but seeing your dad looking poorly in hospital but sometimes you have to suck it up and be there for that person.

I’m sorry you’re going through this and I hope he gets better soon 💐

itsjustbiology · 31/12/2024 20:12

I am really sorry OP you have to face this. In my view your mum is a disgrace. I only hope your dad gets well very soon.

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