To not say when I know the answer?

[GreyBlackBay]

I have a close friend who I also work with. We've known each other for years and he has a fair few MH problems and leans on me heavily.

He's always been a bit useless in the memory and organisation department and I have often had to prod him to remind on work stuff.

I feel it has gone far too far now and that he's not even making an effort himself. Today I have had work related WhatsApp :
What were my actions from that meeting before Christmas?
What is the cost centre code?
When do we have to do this by?

And easily googleable non work :
When is this event?
Is this a good price for this product?
Is the weather supposed to be bad this week?

Plus various requests for my thoughts on the economy, house prices, whether he'd be better moving or staying where he is.

I am ASD and I find it nearly painful to not answer a question once asked. I definitely can't ignore a text so today I've been replying with 'don't know' but I do know the answers for the questions and could just tell him with no effort at all.

It feels petty to not tell him when I do know the answer. I think telling him to not ask me would be seen by him as a lack of support since it costs me nothing to tell him what I already know. I can't see what else I can do other than say I dont know or continue to answer.

Anyone else successfully dealt with this type of behaviour?

AIBU to keep saying I don't know?

I think that you have already found the solution

Instead of giving the answer to a question, you could give him a task to do.

Q What's the weather this week?
A My favourite weather app is the Met Office one. Just download that and you can see the weather this week and the long range forecast.

If he asks you how to do it, ignore!

But for the work stuff you have absolutely the right idea. Either say don't know or don't answer at all.

I suspect his questions aren't all genuine. He's desperate to get your attention. You aren't obliged to give it.

Thank you, you're both right, I will try to continue with the I dont know routine.

I do think it is a contact thing, he's bored maybe. If he was sat next to someone at work he'd just ask them which is faster than looking it up yourself. I think he's transferring that to me.

I just feel it's so petty to say I don't know when I do. There's probably not many questions where he knows for sure I'd know it off the top of my head though, and I'm sure he wouldn't expect me to look it up.

Tell him to ask Alexa or ChatGPT instead!

He sounds like an annoying small child who's just learnt to say "why". Carry on with your strategy until he grows TF up.

If he's a close friend, why don't you tell him to act more like an adult and stop using you as his unpaid secretary?

You're enabling his pathetic behaviour.

If you left the company tomorrow, he'd have to act like an adult.