to expect my nearly 4YO DD1 to STOP TALKING just occasionally?

[Pendulum]

She will be 4 in two weeks. Some days, from the moment she wakes until she falls asleep she verbalises her every thought at a pitch that I find hardly bearable. It's a jumble of random observations, questions that I don't understand (e.g. "Does Tommy Zoom like trouble?" and "How do you clear a traffic jam") and general shouting.

I know she is capable of concentrating because she can spend hours on the computer or colouring when the mood takes her. But on her noisy days, God help me I feel as though I have been assaulted by noise and interrogated by Paxman in a foreign language all day. She doesn't listen to me and just talks louder if I try to interrupt the flow. Combine this with a 7 month old who has just learned to shout and I am frazzled.

Does this sound familiar? I do wonder sometimes if she has some kind of attention deficit disorder.

Oh yes. I remember starting a thread about ds at around the same age. His constant talking on public transport nearly drove me mad. 'Are we at the station yet. We're nearly there. We're here. Look the doors are going to open. The doors are opening. The doors have opened. Are they going to close now? The doors are going to close now aren't they? Look, the doors are closing. Now the train's going to go isn't it' and on and on. We could clear carriages .

I think it's a stage. Are you chatty too? We all talk a lot so I guess it's inevitable that the kids are a bit like this too.

I think you learn to tune it out. And also say STOP sometimes. Or 'if I'm going to understand, I need you to say that slowly and clearly'.

foxinsocks I have just winced reading that

you have captured it perfectly.

Yes, I used to be smug feel proud about chatting away to my kids about anything and everything. So I guess I have created the monster. She is really bright and lovely though, she just makes me want to beg for mercy at times. And trying to think about something else at the same time (read a timetable, work out what veg to buy for supper) is a nigh on impossible task.

I have three like this. Albeit the oldest is 13, so it's starting to wear off and be replaced by grunts and shrugs.

Give it 10 years...

my first attempt at strikeout was successful then...

I do sometimes find the phrase, "Shut the f*ck up!" forming in one of the darkest recesses of my mind. Of course I would never say that...

But I do find, "Do you ever worry that you talk too much?" interrupts the flow for a couple of seconds, while they try to work out what you mean. With slightly older children, "Oh, I do love listening to your innocent prattle" has a similar function.

Have sympathy for you Pendulum, one of my mindees doesn't stop talking. He is 5yo and the crap (sorry but it is)that spouts from his mouth drives me potty sometimes. He just doesn't shut up. Like your LO he asks constant questions that make absoloutly no senses and before you've had a chance to answer he's on to the next question/observation. He will ask the same question twice, even though I've already answered the first time and just goes off on complete tangents. I've just given up trying to compete for air space now and only answer if he pauses for breath for at least 5 secs. His biggest problem is not engaging his brain before opening his mouth. I always try and direct silly questions back at him such as 'what do you think?' I've kind of learnt to tune out and just say 'mmmm' and 'ahhh' every so often. On the positive side he can concentrate for ages when is playing with lego etc and is a wonderfully sensitive lad but some days....argh! I think he may be a little highly strung. I know now to avoid foods that contain additives and too much sugar and to make sure he gets plenty of exercise and physical activities! I'm hoping he will grow out of it eventually!

This sounds exactly like my dd2. Her sister says "does she ver stop talking" and it is just prattle all the time just to make a noise. I have learned the art of not really listening but knowing when to give appropriate answers. If it is something that she really needs or wants an answer to then I make her stop talking to listen to me otherwise she can ask the same question 10 times because she doesnt stop to listen, Its such a joy isnt it.

Also we have the 'volume' problem' too. I spend most of my time saying, Beth Volume, we are all in the same room you know. It's great.

it got really bad when both of mine were at school together and would fight about who talked to me first. I could see them starting to talk to me while they were lining up to come out. I couldn't hear them...but they were both so keen to get the first word in they felt they had to start in advance lol. Just wait till your 7 month old can talk .

I am lol at you creating the monster though. LEARN to tune it out. There are all sorts of tactics for diverting them but tbh, if they are the chatty sort, there's really nowt you can do other than, as agonybeetle says, waiting till they hit puberty then coming back to mumsnet and posting 'oh my baby - she used to talk so much and now she doesn't say a thing. Sigh'

I used to make mine take turns in talking and remember who had had the first turn last time.

Also, at 4 she can start doing clubs like ballet, drama, swimming...those are good for chatty ones (you'll probably find she's really quiet in them!)

interesting elliedeb I have noticed that sugary food makes the situation worse almost instantly. I don't ban anything but do try to restrict her intake of ice-cream, biscuits and chocolate. After a birthday party, for example, I sometimes need to push her into the garden for a bit to talk to her imaginary friends (luckily she has plenty of those)

Turniphead I've got to hand it to you, at least DD2 isn't talking yet!

Agonybeetle I have thought similar phrases too, many a time. I hope I have never said it, although I can't be sure it didn't slip out once or twice when I was in the deepest throes of sleep deprivation with DD2.

foxinsocks- she is quiet in club/ playgroup type situations! she is the kid twisting herself around my legs while all the other mums say "Oh how sweet, she's shy"!

Yes, his brother whom I also mind, but on a different day (thank goodness, otherwise I'd be looking for the highest bridge!) gets very black moods I find, when given foods with sugar, so maybe there's something in it? Or certainly it affects some children quite profoundly and others not so much.

oh lostinfrance, I have just lololol. That sounds like hell.

Our car journeys are like that.

Can yours sing? I find this is the only way to escape the car journey hell. Put on tapes that you can all sing to, really really loudly.

Either than or buy them a nintendo each and a really exciting game that takes ages to finish (not nintendogs because that involves talking).

DS2 is like this.

He woke up yesterday at 5.40am and brought Buzz Lightyear into our bed....

...'Look Mummy, see how he lights up, he is my friend, I love Buzz and I love you Mummy, do you love me cos I love you from here to the moon, round Africa and back again, Mummy can you hear me? are you waking yet? is it breakfast? i'm thirsty, are you thirsty? Is Daddy awake? Is my bruvver awake.........'

.....he DID NOT STOP until 7.30pm when he went to bed.

I do love him so much but his drivel drives me crazy. He is 3.6years.

Turniphead my DD has two sets of 'friends'. One are characters from Cbeebies, mainly Stephanie, Finley and Sportacus (I had to pretend to feed Sportacus a boiled egg the other day, but that's another thread.)

The second lot are five imaginary cows. Most of them are called the same name as DD1 and they are good cows. The fifth one is called Poncey and is the bad apple in the barrel. I am often told not to go into a certain corner of the living room because that is where Poncey has been sent for bad behaviour.

Fantastic imagination, or teetering on the brink of madness?

Very reassuring thread for me - thank you all.

We too have the constant chatting - as you say, Pendulum and collision from the moment she wakes right up until going to sleep time (usually delayed by a few sessions "one more thing Mummy").

Also a whole gang of imaginary friends, none of whom have names you've never heard before e.g. Dibby, Kaka, Jaboo.

Dh hears her chuntering along the corridor to our room in the morning and moans "here we go, another day of noisy prattle".

And today I just booked a 5 hour train journey for the two of us. Thought I should avoid booking the "quiet carriage"

I regulary ask my 5.5 yr old if he knows that he will run out of words eventually ....

I am weeping with laughter and recognition at this thread.

When the DCs get going it is like having woodpeckers on my head, one on each side.

"Mummy, what if you were in a car, but you forgot that you were in a car, and then the traffic lights changed colour but you forgot that they had, and then..."

and, at the same time,..

"Mummy, you know that park? That park where we went that day? That park where they had the things? You know, Mummy? BE QUIET DS I AM TALKING!"

cue shouting, pushing and tears all around me.

pendulum

have you been in my house today. well anyday realy.

dd1 (4.3)has a very active imagination and quite often have a houseful of various freinds.

and dd1(8mths) now joins in at every chance she gets.

I have been wishing away the time since 4pm so i can out them to bed. My excuse to day is that i have a cold,earache and a headache and i want quite.