Red flag?!

[Manderin97]

Not sure if this is a red flag on its own as I've only been getting to know this man recently. He said via text message earlier that he's been trying to find out if we have any mutuals and if we do, hes going to ask them to find out 'if I'm a good egg or not' in those words. I found this a bit weird? Anyone else?!

It's weird to announce it. I suppose asking mutual friends if they think you might be a good fit wouldn't be so unusual? Then again, I have no idea about the modern dating scene.

I'd block him.

If you're going to online date you need to stop second guessing yourself. If someone is giving you a bad feeling just block and move on.

Is he a tweedy sort of country folk, wellies and labradors sort of man? Does he have a butler called Jeeves?

I suppose so but he's trying to find out if anyone has any gossip or knows anything bad about me! Which I don't really like that he's telling me that

Social media stalking is not only 'normal' on Mumsnet, it's positively encouraged.

Do some digging of your own and see what you come up with.

Before OLD became a thing, you'd meet someone in a social circle/work setting and could verbally ask about.

I suppose looking at a person's SM is the modern equivalent.

I’d find it patronising and rude.

Dump this weirdo at once.

It’s a power play. It puts you on the back foot: he is checking on you, and you have to wait and see what he decides.

Yeah he’s being a dick.

Ask him if he wants references.

Then ditch him. He has no filter. That’ll get annoying quickly.

I would assume he has some dirt that could come out

He sounds weird tbh, move on girl x

My rule is that if you’re having to post on here for confirmation then it’s probably a red flag. If it’s not and it’s your insecurity then that itself is a red flag that you shouldn’t be getting into a relationship. So whichever way you look at it, it’s a red flag.