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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WWYD? Christmas bonus

29 replies

Thingsthatgo · 26/12/2024 22:35

I woke in a really small business, just 2 employees.
For the last 4 years my boss has given me a cash bonus at Christmas. He just gave it to me in an envelope on my last working day before Christmas.
This year he didn't. But he is notoriously forgetful, and it's been a good year at work, and I did something pretty spectacular for the business in November.
So I think he just forgot. Can I ask him?
I won't be seeing him again until January. My DM says to just keep using the word 'bonus' when talking to him, in the hope it'll trigger his memory!

The other employee is new, so she is no help to me!

OP posts:
pinksquash13 · 26/12/2024 22:36

Tricky. Probably not. Won't you just get it in January?

fuzzychic · 26/12/2024 22:38

Nah you can't say anything. If he wants to give it to you he will.

MadnessIsMyMiddleName · 26/12/2024 22:38

I'd just ask him if there was any reason you didn't get the bonus this year. If he intended you to get it and has forgotten, it will trigger his memory, and if not, it gives him the opportunity to explain why.

Original poster
Thingsthatgo · 27/12/2024 08:28

Argh. Maybe I could ask why I didn't get it this year. I'm pretty assertive, and I have a reputation for being quite headstrong, so I am trying to back away a bit more.
It's so frustrating for me to think that he might have forgotten.

OP posts:
soupfiend · 27/12/2024 08:30

Thingsthatgo · 27/12/2024 08:28

Argh. Maybe I could ask why I didn't get it this year. I'm pretty assertive, and I have a reputation for being quite headstrong, so I am trying to back away a bit more.
It's so frustrating for me to think that he might have forgotten.

Why is that frustrating, people do forget things and I would imagine its less frustrating than the reason being that you're not going to get it at all?

ChristmasPudd1990 · 27/12/2024 08:58

I would ask and asky why not? What can be improved etc?

Amba1998 · 27/12/2024 09:21

What makes you think he’s forgotten over you not actually getting one? This year has been tough on businesses and next year is going to get even more so. Perhaps he can’t give one

Original poster
Thingsthatgo · 27/12/2024 09:29

He would talk to me if we couldn't afford one. I am sure if that. One year we weren't doing so well and I was offered an alternative instead, which was very generous.
However, I have an overview of the business accounts and we are doing better than ever.

OP posts:
Mill3nniel · 27/12/2024 09:41

Unless he's ever said you'll be getting a bonus this year I think it's hard to ask for it.

Ifailed · 27/12/2024 09:43

I trust you are declaring this additional income to HMRC?

TheMamaYo · 27/12/2024 09:45

Ifailed · 27/12/2024 09:43

I trust you are declaring this additional income to HMRC?

😆 What's it got to do with you, really? Why do you need to 'trust' that OP is doing that?
Such a weird comment.

Mirrorxxx · 27/12/2024 09:51

@TheMamaYo tax evasion is to do with everyone. If someone is evading tax then everyone else has to pay more

Dozycuntlaters · 27/12/2024 09:53

A bonus is at his discretion and no I don't think you should ask why you didnt get one. Never rely on a bonus or presume you are going to get one, it should just be...well, a bonus

I get a bonus every July, one year I didn't get one, I never mentioned it, didn't ask why I didn't get one and I got it in the August. I think my boss was appreciative I didn't ask about it, and it probably would have got his back up had I queried it.

Your boss runs a company, I am sure he wouldn't forget about your bonus so maybe he's waiting until the new year or maybe there's stuff going on which means this year he just can't offer one.

Evaka · 27/12/2024 09:57

Absolutely ask OP. Not like wtf happened to my bonus, more like 'did you decide against bonuses this year?', nice and neutral.

Doesn't matter that it's not 'owed' per se, if you've had it in the past there's a vague expectation and your leader should communicate and manage expectations.

Mindymomo · 27/12/2024 10:00

If you have a good relationship with your boss, then I would say something, along the lines of “sorry to mention it, but have you forgotten my bonus”. I was always able to speak to my old boss about anything, he was always busy running around, so would welcome me reminding him.

TheMamaYo · 27/12/2024 10:02

Mirrorxxx · 27/12/2024 09:51

@TheMamaYo tax evasion is to do with everyone. If someone is evading tax then everyone else has to pay more

Sure, but this post has nothing to do with tax evasion.

JMSA · 27/12/2024 10:05

I would definitely query it, in a gentle and concerned way.
He shouldn't just randomly change the goalposts one year without prior explanation.

Lurkingandlearning · 27/12/2024 10:10

MadnessIsMyMiddleName · 26/12/2024 22:38

I'd just ask him if there was any reason you didn't get the bonus this year. If he intended you to get it and has forgotten, it will trigger his memory, and if not, it gives him the opportunity to explain why.

This. Definitely this

mewkins · 27/12/2024 10:12

Evaka · 27/12/2024 09:57

Absolutely ask OP. Not like wtf happened to my bonus, more like 'did you decide against bonuses this year?', nice and neutral.

Doesn't matter that it's not 'owed' per se, if you've had it in the past there's a vague expectation and your leader should communicate and manage expectations.

I agree. You can ask in a very reasonable way. It's a small business and you contribute massively. I'm sure your boss would prefer to keep you rather than you grow resentful and look for a new job so an open and honest conversation is the way to go, whether you end up with a bonus or not.

Lurkingandlearning · 27/12/2024 10:14

Ifailed · 27/12/2024 09:43

I trust you are declaring this additional income to HMRC?

She’s an employee. It will be accounted for in payroll.

Penguinmouse · 27/12/2024 10:15

Lurkingandlearning · 27/12/2024 10:14

She’s an employee. It will be accounted for in payroll.

Show quote history

Not if it’s just handed to her in cash as her original post suggests. Find it unlikely that this is being declared.

BleachedJumper · 27/12/2024 10:15

Lurkingandlearning · 27/12/2024 10:14

She’s an employee. It will be accounted for in payroll.

Show quote history

I do wonder if the envelope of cash suggests it’s maybe ‘under the table’ as it were.

Although I have had jobs in the past that physically paid me in cash, but I also had my paye advice slip in the envelope and it was accounted for legitimately.

mickandrorty · 27/12/2024 10:50

Ifailed · 27/12/2024 09:43

I trust you are declaring this additional income to HMRC?

Why should they declare a gift for working hard? If their boss gave them some chocolates as a bonus should they be sending some of them to HMRC?

Littletreefrog · 27/12/2024 10:55

Lurkingandlearning · 27/12/2024 10:14

She’s an employee. It will be accounted for in payroll.

Show quote history

Not necessarily. If it's paid in cash and put in the accounts as miscellaneous it might not go through payroll and therefore not be subject to tax and NI. This is the reason many employees give vouchers of £50 or less rather than cash as that can be treated as a "trivial benefit" and not taxed.

Littletreefrog · 27/12/2024 10:56

mickandrorty · 27/12/2024 10:50

Why should they declare a gift for working hard? If their boss gave them some chocolates as a bonus should they be sending some of them to HMRC?

Show quote history

Not the same thing at all. Any cash given should be treated and taxed the same as wages. The cash in an envelope rather than an addition to their normal pay suggests that isn't happening. Anyway that wasn't even the point of the thread so we are getting a bit off track here.